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PureLithium Offline
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First day of schools means a new year and a new me - August 22nd 2009, 01:11 AM

Ok so this year I am going to try to be completely different. I'm so sick of hiding inside my shell and avoiding people. I want to be out there this year, make some new friends, have fun, and possibly get a boyfriend. Of course my main thing is to be confident! I've already gone school shopping and got some new clothes totally different from my usual t-shits. I've gone with a different brand and have decided to start wearing make up this year but I'm not doing it. All I'm using is some cover up, blush, and mascara. I've been using a whitening tooth paste for a brighter smile and so I'm hoping the new smile, new clothes, and attitude will help with my confidence. I'm going into the tenth grade, my second year in high school. Everyone always says high school will be the time of your life and so far it hasn't been but this year I want to change. I'm going to try to be more girly I guess.

Can anyone give me any advice on how to be more outgoing and confident for this new year? Any special routines I should follow? Any advice for a new school year and especially for the first day and how to make this year great would be appreciated. Thanks guys.
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Re: First day of schools means a new year and a new me - August 22nd 2009, 04:27 AM

That's great you're making these changes! Just make sure that you feel like yourself in your new clothes. For me, makeup and clothes I feel good in make me feel confident in myself. I don't know if you have any feelings about your inner self like self doubt, questioning self worth, friend making ability; but you may need to address these as well. Of course, since I don't know you I don't know if you have any of these problems! haha But I do know there are plenty of self help books out there, and tips for making friends/being confident/etc. on wiki answers.

Being more outgoing/making conversation:
-Show of that shiny new smile! A smile tells people you're confident, friendly, and approachable.
-Compliment people. I read a tip in a book saying to use the word "you" in your compliments. "That dress looks great on YOU." It means more than liking the actual dress.
-The same book also gave the tip "use their words" if they say call their "desk" a "seat," the next time you need to say "desk," say "seat" instead. Things like that. "Backpack" and "Bag" If you use the same word, they thing you can relate to them.
-Introduce yourself. I've found an easy way to start a conversation at the start of a school year is "So, what class did you have before this?" or "I think you're in my english class." For electives you could ask "So, did you chose Psychology or did you just get thrown in here?" After you've initiated the conversation, introduce yourself or ask for their name. "I'm sorry, I didn't introduce myself..." Or "What did you say your name was?" If you show an interest in someone and are engaged in the conversation they will like you.
-While talking to someone it's important to give them your FULL ATTENTION. Keep eye contact, and pay attention to what they're saying.

Join a club, sport, volunteer organization, youth group or whatever. You will meet new people this way, and you'll have something fun to do during the school year.

Remember, be persistent, don't feel bad if the first few people you talk to don't respond ideally, don't give up. You have at least one person rooting for you! PM me if you'd like!
   
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Re: First day of schools means a new year and a new me - August 22nd 2009, 10:28 AM

I always have feelings of self doubt and hopelessness but I was hoping my new confident self should change this.

Thanks for the great advice, I will definitely try the compliments and introducing myself. i never really knew how to do that but your advice on asking what classes etc sounds like a great way to kick off a new friendship. I already have at least one club picked out that I want to do this year and it's a community service club so I should meet some new people that way for sure.

Thank you so much for the tips!
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Re: First day of schools means a new year and a new me - August 22nd 2009, 11:42 PM

Hey there,

I think it's great you are trying to make a change. The best advice I can give is when you talk to people try and see what they are interested it. It can be hard at first (because you don't know them ) but as the conversation progresses they will say something and you will kind of figure it out. If you are interested in reading and they bring in a book ask them about it and see if they like to read; do stuff like that to find common interests and to find what they are interested in so if you hear any little snippets about their interests you can pass it along.

For example, say they are interested in sports and you hear something interesting on the news about a sports star you could ask them about it and see what they have to say. People like to know that you are interested in them.

Joining clubs is great and the one you have picked out sounds good. I usually had one or two back up clubs just in case the one didn't work out and it gave me more options.

Best of luck.

Jenna


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