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Neararrgivi Offline
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School project problem (guilt-ish) - December 10th 2011, 03:18 AM

Hi so I had a big project due today in my math class (Algebra 2- Junior in high school). So my classmate bailed on me for the project. some background information. 3 classmates and myself were assigned this big project (separate from the one i will be talking about) and 3 of us did all the work. we did out best to get the 4th to but he just didn't do anything. lets call him john (just off the top of my head). so john didn't do anything at all and we complained and he got a lower score then the rest of us. so then for another project, in math, we were told to get into groups of 3-4. well all of the groups were taken by the time i got to class (i was working late on a test the previous period) and i got john as a partner. all other groups were full. so its the two of us and i made it clear what we would do. i chose to do more then half (we had to make a booklet with math stuff in it) and he would do half the work, i would do the other half and the booklet. this was assigned on Monday (this previous one). so anyways, i did my math work on Monday night and asked him if he had done his work. he said no. so i asked him Tuesday in school. still didn't have it. come Thursday and he still doesn't have it. its due Friday (today) so i get home from school and work from 2:00 pm to 11:23 pm working on it (i had other hw too). i spent most of time doing his part and the booklet. it did really take that long because being by myself, i wanted to do a good job. so the next day in class he hands me this paper (after i had already turned in the project) and he said its his work. i didn't put his name on the project, only mine. i was really mad at him. so after class i talk to my teacher and i explain everything (just a bit more detailed then this) and she says that he will either get 5 points or 0 points (out of 60) because of said above. so i get to the next class and i talk to him about it. he looked destroyed, betrayed, and dumbfounded all at once. hes struggling in school and i think has some sort of disorder but he did jackS**t on the project. i did a full write up for my teacher so she could review it. anyways i know he didn't do anything but i feel guilty that his grade (be basically have the same grade in math B+) but from the first project (with 4 people- which we got a D on because a teammate plagiarizer and some other stuff) and and F from this, his grade will drastically drop. i know in some of your eyes i did the wrong thing by not putting his name on it even though he was my partner but he didn't do anything until literally the very last possible second. i feel this weird guilt that he will have a poor grade (also i sit next to him and take partner quizzes and hw with him) so im afraid he inst going to do anymore. he seemed torn up almost. i feel guilty because it was my councious decision to not put his name on and technically sabatauge his grade (but not purposefully). i mean i talked to my parents about it and they both said that he deserves less than nothing (while i was actually working on it) but anyways how can i get rid of this feeling. i already confronted him about it, talked to my closet friend, and both my parents (seperitly and both at a time.)

im just glad to get all this off my chest- even though it was already off really. but i just want some feed back on my decisions on the situation. also mind you, the project was suppose to be done by groups of 3-4 people- i did it entirely by myself.


sorry its so long
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Re: School project problem (guilt-ish) - December 10th 2011, 05:14 AM

I know how that feels but you did the right thing, he didn't contribute and left you hanging. It's not right for him to credit for not helping on what was turned in and it's his own fault that he waited so long to even attempt. I know, I've been in both yours and his shoes at different times. And when I was in a group and I slacked off, my partner wasn't happy and I couldn't blame her. She was a friend who I let down and she did my part the night before so it would be done and I just started the night before. She put my name on the project even though she didn't agree with it since I didn't do any part of the turned in assignment. I ended up telling our science teacher straight up that I had no part in what was turned in and it's my fault for not doing it. Because I stepped up he gave me 3 days to do my part for half credit.

My point in telling that is that you did the right thing. If you had let him get away with doing nothing, he may then think that he can just scoot by on others work and he wouldn't have learned anything. You may feel guilt but in the end, I promise you, you didn't do anything wrong, and maybe when his grade is low he'll realize he can't keep procrastinating like this, and maybe his parents will help him to understand more if he doesn't understand it so well.

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Re: School project problem (guilt-ish) - December 10th 2011, 06:53 AM

You did the right thing. Don't feel bad for it, you did the work and you did the right thing by not slacking so you deserve the credit and the grade. You should not feel bad for him failing the class and getting low grades if he has not done his share in projects.

In eighth grade I had the exact same thing happen for a history project. It was me, *Sara and * Jen and we had a week to do it. *Sara was to get the poster board and do one part of the project, *Jen was supposed to do research for another and I would do the third and fourth part of the project. Tuesday came along and Sara did not get the poster board nor did she do her research. Jenn wasn't even there. Wednesday it was flip flopped where Jenn was there and Sara wasn't. Jenn didn't have any of her research. So I decided to take it upon myself and get the needed materials and do all the research. ( They told me later when they were both there on Thursday they had missed school simply because they did not want to be there, other wise I would have been fine if they were sick. But they werent) Thursday, they bothed showed up and both had maybe two facts for the parts of research they needed to do and they did nothing to help me prepare the project like putting it together on Thursday. They sat there and chit chatted with one another. Friday came along and I turned it in with only my name on it. My teacher asked my why my name was the only one on it and I explained to her that they did maybe 2% of the work and I had to make up for it. They were livid with me when they got their grade back with 0's. They started getting angry with me and almost yelling but my teacher stepped in and basically put them in there place. I did not feel bad because I know I did what I had to do and didn't slack off.

So don't feel guilty whatsoever. It would not have been fair to you for someone else to get credit when they did nothing and it really isn't fair to the other person because then they can think they can do nothing and still get credit, he needs to learn that he needs to do what he is supposed to do, to do well. What happened to me in eighth grade just made me realize that when it comes to your success and your school work you need to look after yourself first. Through out high school and even sometimes now in college (depending on the class) I ask if I can work alone in group projects and I just tell them I prefer it because I want everything to be done and I don't end up getting hurt in the end grade wise. Because I have had one or two smaller situations like that after what happened in middle school and it isn't fair to me to get a low grade due to everyone elses lack of priority or laziness for school.
So that may be something to think about and possibly ask when having to do group work.

Always remember to put your happiness first.
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