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Sara99 Offline
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Unhappy Overwhelmed, Stressed, Going to Break Down - April 13th 2012, 02:30 PM

Hello, I'm in ninth grade and I am in a need of advice.
I do online-schooling. I've moved a few times so now that my parents and us are able to live out in the country I haven't gone to regular public school since seventh grade. Anyway, the online schooling program that I got involved with in September of 2011 is required for you to stay in the program so I cannot switch to another online program even if I wanted to (is already paid for all high school years, etc.). They send you the materials like workbooks in the mail and you send it back to the teachers at the program to mark and you view some of the stuff online.

So now that I go that out of the way, here's my problem -- the amount of work they give you is absolutely ridiculous. I'm talking about being required to complete 7 courses to consider your grade completed (a.k.a. you complete all 7 grade 9 courses, so you can move on to 10th grade work). To complete a course, they give you 4 workbooks, all have 5 lessons in each and total up to 20 lessons. It may not sound like much, but each lesson is filled with words and questions from bottom to top and total to around 60 whole pagesfor each. Not to mention that you have to do a test to complete your course which is the main percentage of receiving your credit.

Remember how I said I enrolled in September? I haven't even completed one course yet. I have to complete seven courses to pass onto tenth grade. I'm close to finishing up one course (Science) but I still haven't done the Test for that one. Every single day I try to work on my courses but the work is so hard that I try to put it off. I keep procrastinating, too. I often end up being stuck at my desk from 7am in the morning to 11pm at night straight with little to no breaks and even when I do that I don't even finish a lesson. I can't take it anymore. Just an hour ago I could only complete a couple of English questions until I got that jittery feeling again -- feels like I want to scream, my legs become weak, and it feels like my insides are going to explode whenever I think of the schoolwork I have to do.

I'm going to be "in high school" when I'm 20 if I keep it up like this. I'm not going to have a summer. I'm not going to have any free time except schoolwork, schoolwork, schoolwork. It makes my head pound and I feel physically sick when thinking of all the schoolwork I've hardly started. I don't know what to do -- my parents suggested a tutor but I truly do NOT want one because I understand the work, it's just the fact that I don't allow myself to do it. I take one look at it, see the amount of stuff I have to do, and close the book and walk away. It makes me want to throw up. I lay awake at night thinking and thinking of all the work I have to do and the amount of all-nighters I've pulled since September is strange. This honestly makes me sound like I'm being melodramatic, but this is really how I feel about it -- I don't think anyone would understand exactly how this feels unless they were in my shoes.

I've tried talking to my parents about it but all they say is "just organize your time" and nothing else. It's easier said than done but I can't take thinking of all this work I have to do.
Please, someone help me! I feel like I'm stuck! I really don't want to be stuck doing grade 9 work until next year when I finally finish it. I should've been done all my courses by at least July, yet I haven't even completed one because the work just overwhelms me intensely. Any advice would help me a lot, thanks. Sorry for writing so much.
   
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Re: Overwhelmed, Stressed, Going to Break Down - April 13th 2012, 06:07 PM

Sara, it sounds like you and your folks need to have a more in depth conversation about this. The issue isn't 'Time management', but rather the content and the expectations. You need to clarify for them what you're experiencing so they have a more accurate sense of things. From that, you guys might be able to come up with some plan to address this. Of course, if there's a lot of non refundable money involved, or a lack of other options, that might be hard. But, perhaps there's some accommodation that can be worked on, maybe tutors?


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Re: Overwhelmed, Stressed, Going to Break Down - April 14th 2012, 05:49 PM

You didn't write too much at all, I'm sorry to hear that this is so overwhelming for you. As someone who has had this happen in regular school and college I know what it feels like. Time management is a factor here, but you shouldn't be stressed to the point that you're physically ill. You mentioned both the amount of work and how hard it is. If the difficulty is the problem, I would agree with your parents that a tutor might be helpful, even if you don't think it will work, it couldn't hurt to try that.

If the amount of work is the problem, break it down into reasonably sized pieces. Instead of focusing on the 7 complete lessons that aren't even close to finished, focus on one at a time. Do a few pages of it a day until it's done and then take the test. Give yourself breaks during the day so you won't want to throw the book at the wall and try to remove all activites that could lead to procrastinating. Once you've reached a goal you've set for yourself, do something you enjoy as a reward. No one enjoys doing schoolwork, but the more you panic and walk away; the worse you make it for yourself.


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