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johndoe77 Offline
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Shyness - August 29th 2012, 05:27 AM

Hey Everybody I need your advice. You see I used to be best friends with a lot of people but i've sorted drifted away because I just can't talk to anyone like I used to. This year is my senior year and i want it to be memorable. I've tried goin' out but there is that thing inside me that holds me back. I would appreciate it if someone could help me turn this around
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Everglow. Offline
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Re: Shyness - August 29th 2012, 08:06 PM

Hey there,

I totally understand what you're going through and it sounds really similar to what I experience myself. Talking to people is a nerve racking thing, and throwing yourself into social situations in which you don't feel comfortable isn't a good thing to do. Maybe build yourself up to it slowly. Arrange to go out with a small group of maybe 2 or 3 friends and so something small like go to the cinema or do some school work. Don't be afraid to go outside your comfort zone a bit and initiate conversation. It's scary, but it gets easier as you get into it! Try looking towards similar and easy interests that you all share in common, something you feel okay with discussing.

Also, don't be afraid to explain to them what's going on. Chances are they'll be understanding and help you out, and that in turn might actually help you feel more comfortable in yourself when it comes to being social. If this is causing you a bigger problem, however, it;s nothing to be ashamed of if you look towards professional help too. They will be able to help you find methods of gradually becoming used to social situations and coming out of your shell a little bit.

I hope this has helped a bit, and if you need any more help feel free to shoot me a PM and I'll be happy to help you out.

Take care,

A paradox:
The things you donít need to liveó
books, art, cinema, wine, and so onó
are the things you need to live

- Matt Haig

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FallingForGrace Offline
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Re: Shyness - September 1st 2012, 08:14 AM

Well first of all, what do you think is holding you back? Is it fear of something or are you not sure why it is that you've become shy all of a sudden? I used to be very outgoing a few years ago, but when I started realizing that people my age almost never had the same outlook on things as I did (I've always been law abiding and very serious) and often got into really ugly verbal fights with me, I began to become more shy and then almost never expressed my opinion. But now, I've learned to say what I want in a way that doesn't seem confrontational or harmful. If you knew the reason why you've become shy, that would really help with giving you some good advice.
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It's Killing Me Offline
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Re: Shyness - September 1st 2012, 03:31 PM

I agree with Kandi. First try and figure out the reason for your shyness and then tackle it. Was it any particular incident or did it happen gradually that you didnt even notice? Did some words hurt you? There must have been some trigger. If you can't figure it out then I am gonna go with the first poster. Take it slow. Slow and steady wins the race. Good Luck.
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