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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Disclosure. Offline
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Smile 2012. - December 30th 2012, 08:42 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So 2012 has been quite a year for me. I met new people, focused on getting fit and healthy, have a full-time job where I get a qualification at the end of my traineeship as well as having colleagues who have supported and believed in me and met my current boyfriend who I love and makes me feel loved.
I've also had my downs too.
What has 2012 brought you?


   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 30th 2012, 09:32 AM

Oh jeez, wow 2012. I can't even believe it happened.
I mean, I started off 2012 with a life changing resolution: stop cutting. I'd think I'd fail, which I did, kinda, but I kinda don't wanna count.
Next month, I found that I could love and be loved and that I'm not a monster and that I could save myself. I found a reason to live and for once in my life, I want to live.
March came with change and risk. It was the month I ran away from my verbally (and sometimes physically) abusive mother and the month I got help for all the crazy things happening in my brain.
April was when I moved in with my dad to escape my mom. That brought a sence of peace, but also extreme uncomfortable weight gain.
School ended in June and I felt freedom, pure freedom. I hate the summer, and that summer was bland, but I felt at peace.
Come September, I moved back with my mom. More change since my mom had reformed her ways and began to actually be nice to me. I started school and actually began to socialize and make friends.
Now it's December and it's the shittiest month of all, but it's made me realize all that I've worked and strived and suffered through this year so much and just ending it now because of the past isn't worth it
2012 is the reason I live. 2012, dispite the fear and joy, the lies and truths, the pain and the love, was my year.


THE POINT OF SINGULARITY IS NOTHING AS NOTHING BEGAN EVERYTHING
PULSING IN THE EXPAND CONSUME WITHOUT BARRIER OR BORDER
IT IS DARK BECAUSE IT IS THE DARKNESS IT IS OVER BECAUSE IT IS THE END
THERE IS NO SENTRY BECAUSE NONE DARE APPROACH
IT HAS NEVER BEEN AND IT IS ALL THAT EVER WAS
AT THE CENTER YOU DO NOT FIND THE ANSWER
YOU DO NOT FIND YOURSELF THERE IS NO CENTER AND THERE IS NO YOU THERE IS ONLY MADNESS
WE ARE ALL HERE NOW.
WE ARE ALL HERE.
WE ARE.

   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 30th 2012, 12:34 PM

It started off with hope and I was tricked into thinking things would magically get better. A guy told me he wanted me to be his girlfriend and I discovered that I was asexual. I didn't believe it for a while- that I actually was. My family always fought a lot and school was hell because for a while I was invisible. Once school let out, things actually got worse, and I started cutting more. I ended up telling my best friend about it and she helped me stop (which took a while). My friends and I went to an amusement park together without having to deal with parents much which was awesome. Then one of my close friends and i got into a fight for a few months. Shortly after, I was going to run away but was stopped. And after that things began to slowly turn around. School started back up and it wasn't half as bad as the year before. I'm basically past the self-harm now. I'm starting to put the past behind me, and not care as much about what people think of me. I've begun to accept myself for who I am and have come out to a few close friends about being asexual. 2012 taught me a lot of lessons, one of the most important being that even when you think no one cares, people actually do and that I shouldn't hate myself for who I am or the mistakes I've made.


"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 30th 2012, 04:09 PM

2012. I attempted suicide, went back to inpatient, fought with friends, almost moved away, failed a class.
I also learned I want to dance. I got a dog, met my amazing boyfriend, refused to touch another drug, stopped cutting.
So, there you go.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 30th 2012, 06:17 PM

I started grad shool and in a few years, unless something goes horribly wrong, I will have the degree that will allow me to do what I've wanted to do since I was 12. Haven't had much time for a life since then though and my family is falling apart, but after 2010, I know it can't get much worse than that.

This year I am eating healthier, period. I am NOT failing more classes, I ended up with a 76 which is low enough that I have to retake one.


Member Since: September 19, 2007
LHO: March 31, 2008- October 13, 2012

"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you." Jean Paul Sarte
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 30th 2012, 07:56 PM

2012 for me has been full of positives mainly everything at work is going well getting a pay rise finally accepting myself for who I am controlling my anger a lot better genuinely positives oh and can't forget getting my first car. I hope 2013 Is just as good
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 30th 2012, 09:02 PM

2012 has been a big year for me and probably one of the more dificult. The beginning of 2012 brought an awesome sense of belonging and respect, Summer made me on top of the world. I was getting heaps of likes of Facebook, I was forgetting about losing my friend and I was just happy.

When I went back to school, I nearly had a heart attack because of the anxiety of losing my friend: it came back. I got therapy and came back. I got over one of the worst times of my life. That's the MAJOR thing. What else?

~I saved someone's life.
~I witnessed me first MAJOR assault.
~I witnesed my first car accident.
~I had my final year of exams.
~I had developed Depression two or three times.
~I JOINED TEENHELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~I turned seventeen.
~I met three of the most beautiful and important peeps in my life.
~And hopefully today, I faced one of my biggest fears LOL. Long story.
~I laughed harder than any other year.
~I discovered my signature Demented face .
~I found a new nickname.
~I found a new favourite show.
~I became more than mildly addicted to music xD.
~I have developed a much bigger understanding of suicide.
~I found my new passion, dream career.
~I wrote my best story yet.
~I survived an apocolypse.
~I loved.
~I won.

Happy New Years, guys <3.

H.


“At times the world may seem an unfriendly and sinister place,
But believe that there is much more good in it than bad.
All you have to do is look hard enough,
And what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the first steps of a journey.”

~My Childhood Friend.
   
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  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 30th 2012, 09:32 PM

From January:

Respite, unable to cope with uni (but luckily didn't get charged fees), hospital, convicted of unlawfully taking motor vehicle, hospital, lose job, move house, hospital, get manic, light fire, paranoid, respite, home, attempt suicide, emergency department/adult short stay, respite, desperately try to do the right thing, last day of 2012.

Positives: I moved into a flat, with my flatmate, who's cool.
Negatives: Everything else except that month (September) that I was manic for the entirety of, and my friend's wedding on December 1.

So . . . yeah . . . 2012, not one of my best years.
   
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 01:56 AM

Ah... 2012. One of my most interesting years, I would say. To start off, my best friend, practically my sister, was killed by a school bus while she was crossing the street. That same week I had mid-terms so I ended up failing every one of them. Then I started seeing a councellor, a few weeks later stopped because I was healed (or so they think). A month after that, I met this guy that I didn't think would be as big of a part in my life than he turned out to be. A few months went by like normal, then summer came along. I got my learner's permit and on that same day, the guy I met a few months before became my first boyfriend (exciting, right?) I JOINED TH The rest of the summer went by with tons of late night phone and Skye calls with my boyfriend. School started up again and I saw my boyfriend for the first time since we had started dating. I had my first kiss I also had my first heartbreak, and the second, and third, oh and the forth. All from the same guy (yea I know I wasn't very smart). I cut (only once). My friend's boyfriend became a big part of my life by helping my through all these heartbreaks (and still does). I was betrayed by my best friend, made lots of new friends, and sent a few pictures I completely regret. Then more guy drama came along, and I met this amazing guy and on 12.12.12 I starting calling him my boyfried
So that about sums up my year. Lots of negatives, but also lots of positives. Hopefully 2013 will bring a lot more positives than negatives
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 02:16 AM

2012...
Competed in Skills USA.
My sister got pregnant.
My dog passed away.
I started therapy.
I met two years on TH and one year on staff.
I turned sixteen!
I completed NaNoWriMo.
I got an A in my first quarter of an AP class. No idea about the next three.
Besides math, maintaining an A average. This first quarter it was an 89 though.


   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 04:34 AM

2012,undoubtedly,it's a year with radical change for me .
2011 is a year when I was a common college student,while I am now a model one in other's eyes when it comes to the year 2012,and I almost cannot believe it myself.I defeated all the others and finally won the opportunity to further my study in NUS on behalf of my college.the winning process was hard ,filled with all kinds of tests and interviews,but the result was brilliant ,totally unexpectedly.But I am now a bit anxious for I always have the feeling that I am not the most excellent and I don't deserve this great chance to study in a universty ranking 28 of all the universities in the world and we all don't.I am afraid I would finally let all the teachers down no matter how hard I was learning .
hope for the best ,plan for the worst
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 06:59 AM

2012....... oh man. It was a bitch, just like karma or fates if they did exist.
I lost two friends. I also lost a best friend, and turned that into just online buddy.
I've gained two acquaintances.
I also guess I was visited with a blast from the past.
And damn, 1997-2011 also was a bitch. It did not leave me with much resources.
I've also watched many new anime. Hellsing, FMA, marvelous things that helped fuel my imagination.
This year... was quite unproductive. I guess I haven't created any works at all this year vs last year.

However, I've gained a year's worth of wisdom, packed I believe [Edited] pounds of muscle, (losing [Edited] pounds in the process, assuming each inch I grow is additional [Edited] pounds.), gained maybe ~200 Chess Elo, (900 --> 1100) and touched many opportunities.
I've always wanted to be 16 so I could get out of the house and get a job. I'm not sure about that anymore, I feel like there is..... a small door of opportunity in my current situation.

I soared my peak elo in LoL from last year. 1550 --> 1890. I began playing Diablo 3, reaching lvl 60 on 2/5 of my characters. I also tried a shooting game.. forgot. I've watched many Epic Rap Battles and AMEN. I've laughed alot this year from youtube. Not friends, just youtube.

As for school. Well I guess we can say that my academic future's out the window. But fuck school.

I've reached the peak of sorrow as well as.. idk, rebounding happiness. However, I still am clinging onto mere hope. I would not consider myself happy and the main reason for that is due to uncertainty of a better future. However,
I've got a crazy idea in my mind, a grand story. That is to be worked on... next year. I've also made two acquaintances I'd previously mentioned, which I believe would never have happened.

This year... meh. Definitely not the happiest. However, I've gained a chunk of experience and I intend to use this experience to build on a greater year.


What lies ahead is unknown. However, in some times, I've sighted several smooth pavements. I myself am the mender of roads, and it is with these we work on.

Last edited by LlamaLlamaDuck; January 8th 2013 at 05:07 PM. Reason: Please do not post weight or calorie numbers, they are against the Code of Coduct. :)
   
  (#13 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 09:09 PM

To sum up my year:
-Guy I was dating went psychotic on me
-Broke off relationship
-Ex continued to harass me for several months
-Saw a school therapist for a bit
-Had the cops in our neighborhood often for car thefts
-Wasn't doing so well in school, because I missed a lot
-Could never sleep & got put on sleep medication
-Suicidal for months
-Transferred schools
-Got put on antidepressants & anxiety medication
-Was told I'm probably ADD
-Met new friends
-Got a new job
-Started dating a friend, whom I'm still dating
-Started hanging out with friends more
-Things are finally looking up



   
  (#14 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 10:50 PM

Not much really happened this year
Went through 3 different personal aids.
Lost a friend.
Finally got help for problems.
   
  (#15 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 11:18 PM

Jeez, 2012. Wow.
~Attempted suicide,
~Self harm got worse and more addictive.
~Lost friends.
~Made new friends.
~got my grades back up.
~I told my therapist things that I shouldn't have.
~Cut down on my Xbox usage :/
~Joined TH.
~Got staff twice
~Met some amazing people.
~met him <3
~Fell in love. (now I know why they say FALL in love)
~Helped people.
~made an impact on some people's lives
~Sent a message to my step brother whom I don't know

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
  (#16 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - December 31st 2012, 11:21 PM

In no order...

Crazy amount of school
Started puking up my food
Got majorly depressed
Joined teenhelp
Cut for the first time and many times
Got my first guitar and really started improving
Got my first bf
And bff
Grew closer to my family
My grandpa had a stroke
Moved
Got a dog.. lol
Started hating and loving food..
Found out I probably have ADD
My sister had a baby and got married
Started my sophomore year of high school
Started volunteer work
Started horseback riding
Started playing the violin in a band
Shot my first gun
Turned 16
My aunt died
Mom started new job
Dad moved somewhere..
Found out a lot about my family
Started watching the walking dead.. lol
Good end to the year I must say! <3


<3
   
  (#17 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - January 1st 2013, 10:11 PM

2012 has brought alot of obstacles and stress.

my grandpa passed away, everyone was fighting for his spot as chief, my auntie had to manage the whole reservation for a month, i met new friends, i got more math done than i ever thought i could, my depression got worse, i had more pressure, responsibility, and expectations to bare. and honestly i was dissapointed when the whole 2012 end of the world thing didnt happen, i was hoping that it would so i could just stop trying, im tired. i just want out.


I watch the hope I had disintegrate before my eyes.
I take a minute and reflect on your fucking lies!
Behind the door, you have two choices, but you don't get to choose.
You can survive or you can die - either way you lose!
   
  (#18 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - January 2nd 2013, 01:37 AM

2012 actually sucked for the majority. >_<

- Lost one of my best friends for reasons I never did find out
- lost control of cutting and other forms of self-mutilation
- lost control of my eating disorder
- my brother is falling away from the family
- everything is just falling apart

But on the brighter side of things

- I had the lead in a play
- I had an amazing experience at the World Choir Games with my choir
- I preformed in my first musical


Yea, that's it. Here's to 2013!


wanderer come home
you're not too far
lay down your hurt, lay down your heart
come as you are.

VM | PM
   
  (#19 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 2012. - January 2nd 2013, 03:09 AM

2012 was basically like 2011 for me, which was basically like 2010.

Not a ton really changed for me, I kind of assimilated myself more into geek culture and finally became a gamer. I played a LOT of Skyrim, and kind of kept up my trend of becoming more and more antisocial.

Overall, it was a year like any other, and that's not necessarily a bad thing.
   
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Re: 2012. - January 5th 2013, 05:49 PM

I'm going to go ahead and close this thread because 2013 is underway. Make this year count!



"It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness"-Chinese Proverb



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LiveHelp Operator August 13th, 2012 General Forum ModeratorDecember 22, 2012 Videos Officer March 19th 2013
   
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