The High School Experience: Worth It or Not?

[CrusadingAvenger]

This is something that I've been questioning for quite some time already. Coming to almost a close with my high school years, I can say that it was a pretty good experience, but would it be something I'd want to repeat again if I was given the option to? Most likely not, and there are several reasons that validate my answer. The main one being the dynamic social structure. From what I've observed, most teens in high school lack maturity, and are often judgmental of others. Every relationship they engage in, whether it'd be a "love" relationship or a friendship, are not taken seriously and therefore, they end up taking advantage of it. Not that I'm implying that all relationships/friendships are like this, but let's face it: most teens in high school are only in it for themselves. Nothing is meant to be taken seriously, and the sad part about that is some of us do take every relationship/friendship we engage in seriously because it matters to us more than anything. When we end up getting hurt by that person, it tears us apart on the inside and makes us do things that we never thought we were capable of doing. We even begin to question ourselves as to who we are, and if we're doing something wrong, or if there's something wrong about ourselves. That's where some of us feel insecure about ourselves and feel like no one will understand us no matter how hard we try to be our best selves. To make us even feel more insecure and disgusted by ourselves, some of us get bullied and picked on because of reasons that are invalid such as we're "a nobody", we don't have good looks, we're not of "popular reputation", etc. So many high schoolers judge others right away just by what they see, not by getting to know the person. It's these very things that make high school a place full of fake faces, and people only do certain things that show "empathy" if it involves some incentive that will benefit themselves.

Even further, high school attempts to cover its flawed social dynamic by creating these "web of lies" that try to convince us that we have this hint of hope that everything and everyone is great around us. They tell us that we're beautiful no matter what. They tell us that we need to be ourselves, not what others want us to be. They tell us to never give up on anything. Anyone can word anything or say anything to make it sound all soothing and inspiring to the point where we think we are confident within ourselves and with who we are. Then why on earth do these "words of wisdom" so to speak are choked on when it comes to the reality of high school and the people that are part of it? We have these motivational speakers, quotes from well-known people in the world posted around the school, movies/videos we watch, all to teach us a moral lesson and learn from it so those very same mistakes are never made again. Though, the question remains: why don't a vast majority of people follow these examples? It's like where's everyones' sense of empathy these days? Doesn't anyone know the difference between what's wrong and what's right anymore?

Looking back at my high school years up to now, I now realize the truth behind high school. It's not a place nor environment worthy of developing meaningful relationships with others. While there are some exceptions to that, this is what it is for the most part. I used to feel like I was missing out on a lot by not ever dating a girl in high school, not ever going to any of the homecomings, you name it. I felt like I was part of this 5% group in the whole school that wasn't good enough for anyone and was never going to get a chance to be with my special someone. However, now that my maturity has become more advanced and I now remain with my own independence, I now see the clear picture: I wasn't missing much to begin with, nor am I missing much now with my last few months of high school. Most people in high school end their friendships/relationships in the most ridiculous ways possible, and over the most ridiculous reasons. It was only then when I realized this that I found out the reason as to why I never did date a girl in high school in the first place. To be honest, it doesn't matter much to me anymore. I still believe in love, and I figured I'd wait until I come across the right partner to dance with. Besides, why do what everyone else is doing when you can just pave the way to your own path? It doesn't matter what the people think about you; it's what you think of yourself that counts and matters most.

With all that said, this is my personal perspective of the high school experience (I figured that this should've been a blog entry, but oh well ). What's your view on this topic at hand? I'd like to hear a diversity of opinions/views on this as well as personal experiences. So, feel free to share your opinion; I'm all ears. Well, I bet most of us will be anyways since I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one questioning this.

[Rivière]

I agree with you to a point in regards to teenagers not always knowing 'love' and then those who really do want something more, like those like yourself end up getting hurt, however, school is an intended place of learning not a dating outpost. With every place we go to, whether it's school, college, university or work, we're going to meet someone who peaks our interest and we're bound to feel at least 'something' for them in one for or another but there are different levels of this. At school here where I live, my experience of school involved a lot of what you said, people who get together because they 'think' they're in love and then they end up splitting, but the primary reason for this is partially because 1. other people are doing it and 2. because their mind is only young, their hormones are developing and so love isn't as much of an agenda as other things. Once you reach college, this is where things develop, you're treated more like an adult and you have to act like it too, this is where some good decent relationships can emerge, and this is not to say they can't from school because they can, but the majority, at least where I went to school, proper relationship development didn't happen until pupils reached college and met a variety of different people which schools can't necessarily offer. Same with university. Same with work.

My experience of school, I had no time to be forming relationships with people, I wasn't really interested, partially because I was getting bullied lot but because no one ever interested me until I left school and went to college.

[Pirouette]

I absolutely agree with what you said. It's like what we talk about and I too, feel like I'm part of that minority who doesn't fit in with the norm. The social structure of high school- let's face it, its just like a hierarchy! Most of the time, its always the cool and popular kids that everything is centered around. For me, I don't get the specialty of being popular and statistically, most of the popular people are just following the crowd. Like you, I've never had a high school relationship either and yes, I've had some crushes that I never really talked to except my current one. So the relationship part about high school, most people are doing it just for fun and they aren't even serious. At least in my school, I've seen couples that date from the start of freshman year all the way to senior year, then break up after due to college. And this cycle then starts over. I don't get it either but it does indeed hurt the people that truly care about building strong relationships and friendships.

I would say that high school has been quite rough at times, but an interesting experience. I obviously do NOT want to repeat it over again but I will definitely look back on it in the future and reflect on it.

Honestly, if I didn't need to get that stupid piece of paper, I would never had gone, or just dropped out when I turned 18. High School sucked for me. Sometimes I wonder why I had to go through with it. I had few friends, my grades were bad (I think I averaged 58-59%), and it felt like I had no freedom what so ever. Because of my lack of drive, the school thought I had some sort of mental disorder and labeled me a special student. When I told them to take that label off, they wouldn't do it which pissed me off at the time.

Honestly school made me feel like I was a sheep, being herded in the same direction as everyone else. Well school is over now and I'm going to follow my own path, and it's going to be MY decision and no one elses.

Sorry this turned into a little rant, but it's hard not to be one when school is brought up.

[Gingerbread Latte]

I can't say high school was all bad for me but I expect that's due to the differences in between UK schools and the US. There was still the "popular crowd" though and that was hard to deal with as most of them basically got popular through being bullies.

Even so, it's true that most of the friendships I had in high school have long gone now. I only keep in contact with a select few and even then we don't speak often. Teachers in school always told us that university and the work place is where you'll end up making lifelong friends. They usually told us this whenever we had to choose options for classes and they were trying to discourage us from picking classes just because our friends were doing so.

I'd say that high school can teach you valuable lessons though. By the time I got to the end of it I'd stopped caring what other people thought of me and just got on with my work. If I hadn't gone through all the struggles with my friends leaving me and break ups etc. then I don't think I would have turned out to be the same person I am today.

[CrusadingAvenger]

These are some pretty interesting points that those of you who shared your views brought up. Sure, high school is overrated, and it's mostly full of people that don't even care about anyone but themselves, but now that I think about it, all those experiences I went through only made me even stronger, and it changed me for the better. It's kind of strange to say that because even though all the bad experiences I went through brought me down to dark levels, it really taught me something, and I only gained more maturity through that. I believe that all this coincides with almost all of us for the most part. Thanks to all of you for sharing!