A Cutter's Tale

[ScreamingButterFly]

Hey it's Jodie! Altho I am so awesome now I use to be really messed up. I use to S.H. for like 3 years. It was a really hard time in my life when everything when wrong all at the same time. I remember thinking just cut open all the pain and get it out. But it never all came out, not untill I stopped the cutting. I never relized how cutting was the thing that was ruining my life. I had nightmares that people in school would see or find out and i was scared shitless.

I had one friend named mike that helped me the most. He was always so right and smart. He helped me slowely but surley stop cutting. Thank god for mike cause i would have never been able to do it on my own. I dont tihnk anyone can. You gotta have friends and support.

I stand..well sit in my computer chair today going strong. No S.H. in over 2 years. I get a double smile face for that lol.

But all i'm tryin to say here is talk yo. You gotta talk to get over stuff like this and yes it is possible. I had a few relapses and thoes times were the worst when you go all the way back to day 1. But it makes it worth something when you get to day 365 366 367 and on.

[*Jen*]

Hey Jodie :-)
Your thread made me smile. You have come so far and I think you have done amazing, because it can't have been easy at all. It just shows it is possible to stop!

[asyoulikeit]

Hey, Jodie it makes me so happy when people post their success stories on here...it's really encouraging to know that it IS possible to stop, to free yourself of the monster. I agree that having support makes the process easier (monumental as it is), and that's why I love TH cause its a support system where so many ppl otherwise wouldn't have one at all. <3

[ScreamingButterFly]

Thanks yeah its been hell but i'm so glade for what i have been able to get ahold of in my life and stuff so yea i'm preety excited =]

[sphynx]

Hey Jodie. Wow, I'm impressed! Kudos and congratulations for having made it to this point! And thank you for sharing your story with us, too. Reading success stories always brings a smile to my face and inspires me with the sense of hope that maybe, someday, I, too, can reach that point...

xo Claire

[soul]

I love recovery stories . They give me hope and courage. It makes me want to work harder towards my goals to know that yes it really is possible and not some far off dream. I hope you keep up the good work for the rest of your life. If things get bad again remember no matter what happens...no matter what hurts you... it is never okay to hurt yourself. Thanks for sharing your story with us I applaud your strength. I congratulate you on making it this far. May the rest of your days be SH free!

[ScreamingButterFly]

Aw thanks everybody!! Yeah i know its been a long trip but a fun one. Things right now arent really that great but i dont even really have S.H. in my mind at all. When something goes wrong that would be the 1st thing i think to do but now it dont even pop up in my mind, which makes things easier for me. But i found something out the other day.

One of my new really good friends, its been cold so we are always bundeled up but the other day it was warmer. She had cuts all up and down her leg.
It really set me back for a min. I couldnt believe it. I didnt want to say anytihng because... Well i dont like telling people that i am/was a cutter so know onw really knows.

Anyway she kinda jsut laughed about it and said "Ah yeah i use to cut myself" and laughed. I was sad.

[soul]

It is awful to find out someone you care about is SHing (or has ever done it). Let her know you care about her and mean a lot to her. Remind her that if she is ever feeling down or like SHing that she can always come to you (as long as it wouldn't be too triggering to help her). Maybe even recommend a few things she could do to help her quit or recommend her to this site? While telling her you are a former SHer could give her hope and reassure her that she isn't alone with this you don't have to share that info if you aren't comfortable with it. I hope your friend is okay.

[ScreamingButterFly]

Yeah I know but i was jsut like shocked by the whole thing i never would have gussed that. But i dont relaly think we are ever gonna talk about it. She dont know about me and i plan on keeping it that way. Unless she starts again which i really really hope she dont.

[soul]

Well if you don't want to talk about it with her now at least let her know she can come to you if it becomes a problem again. I wouldn't be doing nearly as well without the support of my friends.

[udontno]

Jodie, it's amazing that you've been so long without cutting. You should be really proud of yourself because you've accomplished something that a lot of people struggled to achieve. As for your friend, if I was you I would talk to her about your cutting. It could really help her deal with her past and it would be nice to have an ally for support if you get an urge again.

[xxCookiiexMonsterxx]

How amazing. Well done you, for getting so far. Completely inspirational.

[Gidig]

I'm going to move this to the recovery thread, since I think it's better suited there.
If anyone disagrees, you can move it.

Your story is really inspirational, to hear people who've made it so long without self harm. That's absolutely amazing. Keep going forward. =)

[ScreamingButterFly]

Thanks so much everyone i know its been hard but if i can do it so can you. Anyone can do stop its easy to stop its hard to not start agian tho. But from what i saw on my friend its old scars so i dont tihnk i really have to worry about it unless i see new ones. Than I'll say something.