Life isnt always the fair for every youth

[just-me]

I dont want to make this to long because i know you wouldnt want to read it if i do. So I will try and make it as short as possible.

When i was born, I was born into a family, two older brothers one twin sister, me the youngestby 5mins. I had mucis around my lungs and at just 2months old i was rushed to hospital nearly died. I now suffer from bronchitus around 2 times a year.
In primary school i had those friends and all but I look back and I wonder if i was ever really happy. I dont think i was. Never felt like i fitted in. High school came and things just got worse, I had average grades and i pressure myself to keep them I was maturing at an alarming rate to everyone else. By the end of year 7, first year my parents were splitting up. It came a huge burden I didnt and still have managed to talk about. So from there i kept going knowing i was strugling, i turned into the cyber bully, throwing away new friends. I was at one stage sent to the principal and asked why, he asked me if everything was okay at home and i started crying. The booked me into the school counsellor, i had one session hated it and never came back for another.
End of year through till start of year 10 I went on a total downhill, drugs cutting, sucide attempts, everything possible to destroy me, becuase i no longer believed i belonged there. Never worked, and as for my parents finding out never did. I hid it all.
I was now 16 when I wrote a letter to my mum to try and get help, we went to a few different physcs but i never connected. At the end of year 10 i lost one of the few people i could talk to but i wouldnt let myself grieve, at this point i was seeing a phsycoligists and phsychatrist on anti depressents, i felt relativly comfortable with the specialists but never fully.
I kept most of it in. I ended up being sexually abused by my best friend of all people and then he booted to other side of the world. Of all people i did talk to and understood. So here i was with no one, I ended up tyring yet again to commit suicide. This time i ended up in hospital and they got me a ward phsyc, then many different other doctors made me feel like a freak, but i began to open up about the assualt atleast. On more medicatoin and starting to develop some great friends some old some new i started getting back on top. Getting okay with school.
Then in christmas last year my old best friend came home, now i go to school to see his face everyday, I am in my final year of schooling and things are improving at an alarming rate.
To this day no one knows I spoke to the girl that passed away about such deep things, she was my bros best friend and i believe he needs the support more then me, i have spoke up about some family problems to my aunty but the pain inside still feels like it happened yesterday.
I live with it knowing that it will get better. My grades are getting back on top, i still see my phsyc i am still on meds but now i feel i survived at two months of age because i am meant to be here, not tht it was a mistake that i survived
My family i love dearly and my friends are now such great support and i love those in my life dearly.

most of all though i still have a few bad days and even when i was last year it was you guys here that i trusted and kept turning to. teenhelp saved me when i was at my worst, there is hope

[Katrina]

Hey just-me. Thank you a billion for sharing your story. I am so pleased to hear that you're doing better, and you know? It's okay to have bad days every once in a while. It doesn't mean that we're not "getting better." In fact, I imagine that bad days are a part of getting better. [: You've been so strong from day one with everything you've been through, so I know that you're going to be as strong from this point forward. Please take care of yourself, and keep us posted on how you're doing. We do care.

[moyshi239]

Hey, thanks for sharing your story of recovery.
You're a strong individual and you've had to deal with things that some people have never dealt with in their life. That being said, i'm sure many people on TH may be able to relate to this in one way or another and hopefully this inspires them to get help. Recovery is possible, as you're finding out for yourself everyday. Take care of yourself, and be proud that you had the courage to get help and follow through with it. :]