TeenHelp - I feel unloved by my parents

TeenHelp (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/)

- Friends and Family (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f18-friends-family/)

- - I feel unloved by my parents (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f18-friends-family/t153625-i-feel-unloved-my-parents/)

I feel unloved by my parents

Yesterday was pretty horrible.
My dad woke me up at 6 to yell at me about using his phone charger, and he told me to clean my room. I forgot/didnt hear him.
Later that day after having a pretty fun day I came home. He was working on cleaning up the basement since his friend was coming over. My brother and began to help him. And I couldnt hear what he was telling me and so I guessed. He screamed at me because I went upstairs and "hid". Then after doing that he said; "Go and put this away" and I thought I was done, so I went and used my phone. He come upstairs, took it out of the charger and chucked my phone. It currently is shattered and wont work. He screamed at me to go downstairs and help pout more and stop being useless and then screamed more when I began crying because I lost any communication with my friends and getting yelled at for that. Then we yelled because I didn't clean my room, I was confused since I didn't remember hearing that from him. He let me leave and I couldnt even breath correctly and started crying even harder since we live in the country and that phone was the only way I could contact anyone or get help from my friends. When I came home last night after that I was he had come into my room and destroyed it. My closet was empty and everything was scattered into my floor. Mom agreed this was ALL OKAY. I cleaned it all and now my room looks great. He was drunk.

He hasnt talked to me to all day and seems really upset. I am so angry because I have no way of talking to my friends and its just really hard.

Re: I feel unloved by my parents

i can imagine this must be a very difficult situation for you and that it must be very upsetting for you, but it will not always be this way, one day you can move out and no one will be yelling at you anymore. nobody will scatter your things on your floor again. though if things get too violent, then you have to think about yourself and maybe even call the police if necessary.
the important thing is that you don't put yourself in danger and you mentioned you live in the country, so i can understand it's hard to get to phones there. maybe there's a pay phone around you could use to call the police with should things get too hot. another helpful site with numbers to call is our hotlines site.
i don't know how close by people live with you so i don't know if you could not even maybe ask a neighbour to borrow their phone.

like i said already, it's important you're safe and don't put yourself in danger should things get too hot.

if there's no phone around, maybe you could find a place to hide until things cool down and you can come home and calm down too. cry if you want as well, crying releases a lot of emotions and can be helpful in pressure situations.

you also said that your dad doesn't talk with you anymore, maybe your mum could talk to your dad instead and act as a contact person between you and your dad so the issue can be resolved.

being angry is just natural and i can surely understand why you are. maybe some funny youtube videos could distract you? drawing or taking walks are also good techniques to cope with things.

i hope i helped just the least bit and never hesitate to contact me should you ever need someone to talk to! i always have a listening ear. :)

Re: I feel unloved by my parents

Hey,

I can understand why you might be feeling unloved. I can't imagine having a parent do that. I think that what your dad did was wrong and it was, also, wrong of your mom to condone it. Unfortunately, there are people who believe behaving and 'parenting' in that way is the appropriate course of action. I, personally, feel like the behaviors your father exhibit border on emotional abuse.

I am wondering if you have any friend's or other trusted adults you can discuss things with? It might not solve the problems you are having with your parents but it might help to have people to talk to and support you.

Please hang in there and if you would like to chat please feel free to message me.