I don't know.

[craz33me]

I'm just warning you this is probably going to be long and whiny..

Anyways.

So I have this boyfriend/fiancee that I love very very much. We've been perfect until a few weeks ago. One of his best friends (she's a girl) told him she had a crush on him for like ever. He always had one on her. So he was very depressed because he didn't want to hurt her by telling her he was in love with me and he didn't want to hurt me by saying he had a crush on her. So he chose me. I'm glad he did, really I am. But he did try to break up with me about it, because he figured he shouldn't be with either of us and that'd be better. He soon found out he couldn't be without me, and decided to stay with me because he loves me and he doesn't ever want to hurt me again.

But ever since all of this, I haven't been happy. I've been crying every night and the only time I AM happy is when I'm with him or talking to him on the phone. I don't get to see him all the time, or talk to him all the time. He works and goes to school. I go to school, play sports, and I'm on the academics team. So during the week is pretty much a no go. I can't text him all the time like I used to when we didn't have school going on. He's busy and texts when he can. But I don't know it upsets me when he doesn't text back, and I try not to let it. I try very hard but it upsets me a lot. Then like every night when i talk to him on the phone I break down and cry and I don't know why. I absolutely do not know why. I'm happy with him, he's the best thing that's ever happened to me. But I cry every night when I talk to him on the phone. I think too much. I know I do. Maybe that's it, maybe I overthink everything and I cause myself to be upset.

I feel like I'm bringing our relationship down and that I'm ruining it. He tells me I'm not and that nothing is ruining us. Nothing will ever get in between us. That he loves me very much and that he wouldn't change anything about me except my last name and that I could be happy all the time again.

So what the heck is wrong with me?

[Skatergirl]

Are you afraid he might be going out with the other girl behind your back? Is that why you might be crying all the time? Afraid you'll lose him?

[craz33me]

I am afraid I'll lose him.

He says I won't and that I have nothing to worry about. He told me this today, and said what do I have to do to convince you of that.

[craz33me]

I am afraid I'll lose him.

He says I won't and that I have nothing to worry about. He told me this today, and said what do I have to do to convince you of that.