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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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Mercyfall Offline
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She has a bf.. - March 22nd 2012, 03:31 AM

Well, I found out her name, it's Caitlin. Hours later, on FB, I told someone her name, and she said that she has a bf, already. I know that I didn't know her at all and it's strange to cry about someone that you don't know but..it still hurts like hell. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen and I'm so afraid that I won't ever feel that way again. I've never been so infatuated with a girl that she made me quiver uncontrollably, made my heart beat so fast, and lose my better thinking. When I first noticed her, I was checking out at the register. I payed with my card and as I was putting my card away, I looked up as she was handing me the receipt. She looked at me and smiled as I looked into her eyes, then I was struck....I really miss the feeling. I'm so scared that I may never find a girl that does that to me, again. The thought that a girl can make me feel this way, it's just a great thought and a comforting one. Damn, I just wish I had grown a pair and asked her, that way I can at least say that I asked her, instead of figuring it out from someone else. I'm actually considering just going in and telling her that she's beautiful, just for the hell of it, but I don't think that it's a good idea..

Well, I'll be better in time. I don't really blame anyone if they think it strange to be upset about someone that I don't know. I just know, that's how I feel.

I must say, girls with big dark eyes are definitely a weak spot of mine, I just hope I find someone that makes me that weak, at the first sight of her.
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Terry Offline
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Re: She has a bf.. - March 22nd 2012, 03:41 AM

I'm so sorry to hear that!

But yes that is very normal, it's called infatuation, and everyone (or at least most) experience it at one point or another. It's completely normal to have disproportionately strong feelings for some one you barely know, I've been through it many times

If it helps, I always told myself I'd never feel that way again, and it has never been the case yet. There is no single perfect person for you out there, people become perfect for you through spending time with them. So don't ever feel like you've missed your only shot.

If you want to, you can PM me any time, I'm always willing to listen and give it my best shot at making you feel better


Self pity will not rescue you.
Sometimes we have to save our own lives,
not because no one else cares, but because no one else can.

Life for you has been less than kind
So take a number, stand in line
We've all been sorry, we've all been hurt
But how we survive is what makes us who we are.

Dreamed up the maps, give me the charcoal and the paper
We invent paths they cannot see, and they're too scared to walk


Only after disaster can we be resurrected. It's only after you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.
   
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Mercyfall Offline
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Re: She has a bf.. - March 22nd 2012, 03:59 AM

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Originally Posted by Terry View Post
I'm so sorry to hear that!

But yes that is very normal, it's called infatuation, and everyone (or at least most) experience it at one point or another. It's completely normal to have disproportionately strong feelings for some one you barely know, I've been through it many times

If it helps, I always told myself I'd never feel that way again, and it has never been the case yet. There is no single perfect person for you out there, people become perfect for you through spending time with them. So don't ever feel like you've missed your only shot.

If you want to, you can PM me any time, I'm always willing to listen and give it my best shot at making you feel better

Thanks

I don't really feel like I've missed my shot, but I'm just hoping that the girl that is the one, will make me feel like I did with this girl. It just bothers me that I never even had a conversation with this girl. I hate this feeling.
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Re: She has a bf.. - March 22nd 2012, 04:37 AM

First of all, how did the person on Facebook know who you were talking about? Maybe they were thinking of someone else with the same name.

Secondly, even if she is taken, she probably wouldn't mind being told she's beautiful. Of course, there are good and bad ways of delivering that message. For example, simply smiling and saying, "You're beautiful, did you know that?" could come across as an unexpected compliment, whereas giving a small sad smile and saying, "You're beautiful... (emphasis on the "dot dot dot")" could come across as majorly creepy.

Third, there are plenty of fish in the sea. I know that's a horribly cliche phrase, but it's true! You will find another lovely girl someday, and you have the capacity to love, so you WILL love again - it's just a matter of time. When I broke up with my boyfriend of over four years, I thought I was done... I thought I had given up my one chance of ever living happily ever after. Not so! Trust me, if you can fall in love once, you can fall in love again. <3





   
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Re: She has a bf.. - March 22nd 2012, 04:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PSY View Post
First of all, how did the person on Facebook know who you were talking about? Maybe they were thinking of someone else with the same name.

Secondly, even if she is taken, she probably wouldn't mind being told she's beautiful. Of course, there are good and bad ways of delivering that message. For example, simply smiling and saying, "You're beautiful, did you know that?" could come across as an unexpected compliment, whereas giving a small sad smile and saying, "You're beautiful... (emphasis on the "dot dot dot")" could come across as majorly creepy.

Third, there are plenty of fish in the sea. I know that's a horribly cliche phrase, but it's true! You will find another lovely girl someday, and you have the capacity to love, so you WILL love again - it's just a matter of time. When I broke up with my boyfriend of over four years, I thought I was done... I thought I had given up my one chance of ever living happily ever after. Not so! Trust me, if you can fall in love once, you can fall in love again. <3
Well, the person works there. The only explanation that I can come up with is that my sister was the one that found out her name, for me. I told her what she looked like, how she had her hair, and which register she was at. My sister doesn't listen very well, so she may have screwed up, I'm hoping. I don't think I could just randomly go up there and tell her that she is beautiful, without being nervous.

Yeah, I understand. I still really like her and it's tough. I'm also afraid of..idk just never getting over her or actually getting over her. It's like, she's my dream girl and..well I'm sure you know the feeling, except for a guy.
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Re: She has a bf.. - March 22nd 2012, 05:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mercyfall
I'm also afraid of..idk just never getting over her or actually getting over her. It's like, she's my dream girl and..well I'm sure you know the feeling, except for a guy.
That's EXACTLY how I felt with my ex-boyfriend. I invested so much time and effort and love into that relationship, so when I ended it, I felt empty. I was a whole person when I was with him, and suddenly I didn't know what to do with myself. I was a mess. I never thought I could love someone as much as I had loved him, so I figured, "why not have a rebound relationship? I'm never going to find someone worth marrying anyway, since my ex-boyfriend was 'the one.' That was my one chance, and now I've blown it." I couldn't have been more wrong, though. It was impossible to see at the time, because I was hurting so badly and was unable to see things from a different point-of-view... but sure enough, I fell in love again. And you know what? This relationship (NOT the rebound relationship), while it's been far shorter, has been infinitely more fulfilling than my old relationship ever was. I'm not lying to myself (or you) when I say that, and I'm not "settling for less." I genuinely moved on, I became capable of loving again, and my expectations were SURPASSED. That can definitely happen for you as well. It doesn't seem that way right now, but trust me... you'll meet someone new someday. And when you've found "the one," this other girl is going to be erased from your mind. Sure, you may think of her from time to time, but when you look at the girl you're with, there simply won't be any comparison between the two. It will almost be laughable!





   
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