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  (#41 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 21st 2011, 01:24 PM

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Originally Posted by God. View Post

But the double standards women face won't get them put in prison for a long time.
Oh no, just raped, much better.

I had to say it. I know what you mean though. I think we can all agree that there are gross double standards on both sides and it sucks that we can't do anything about them.

However, I don't really think it's only the double standard that gets men put in prison for a long time; it may be what keeps women out, but generally I'd say it's the violence that puts them there. Just because women should have the same penalty and do not does not mean that the penalty for males isn't justified. It's not fair that both sides are not equal, but as with any equality issue, the answer is not to lower penalties/privileges for both sides in order to create "equality;" true equality can only be achieved by bringing the lower side up to the other.

A man murders someone and a woman murders someone else and the two cases are very similar. The man goes to jail but the woman does not, presumably because female violence is perceived as more socially acceptable. The gross inequality here is only solved by the woman also going to jail; letting them both off and saying "Look, no double standard" isn't going to fix anything.

CLIFFNOTES OF THIS POST: Double standards don't send people to jail; crime and violence send people to jail. Double standards create inequality in who gets sent to jail and they should die.



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  (#42 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 21st 2011, 05:14 PM

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Originally Posted by Allons-y! View Post

Oh no, just raped, much better.

I had to say it. I know what you mean though. I think we can all agree that there are gross double standards on both sides and it sucks that we can't do anything about them.

However, I don't really think it's only the double standard that gets men put in prison for a long time; it may be what keeps women out, but generally I'd say it's the violence that puts them there. Just because women should have the same penalty and do not does not mean that the penalty for males isn't justified. It's not fair that both sides are not equal, but as with any equality issue, the answer is not to lower penalties/privileges for both sides in order to create "equality;" true equality can only be achieved by bringing the lower side up to the other.

A man murders someone and a woman murders someone else and the two cases are very similar. The man goes to jail but the woman does not, presumably because female violence is perceived as more socially acceptable. The gross inequality here is only solved by the woman also going to jail; letting them both off and saying "Look, no double standard" isn't going to fix anything.

CLIFFNOTES OF THIS POST: Double standards don't send people to jail; crime and violence send people to jail. Double standards create inequality in who gets sent to jail and they should die.
I don't think anyone was advocating lessening the sentences, we just need to address the issue that women can basically get away scot free for a crime that a man would be in prison over by, and most would agree, making women have the same sentences as men, and stopping them getting lesser ones for the same crimes.
   
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  (#43 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 21st 2011, 06:02 PM

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Originally Posted by MonsterCosmonaut View Post


I don't think anyone was advocating lessening the sentences, we just need to address the issue that women can basically get away scot free for a crime that a man would be in prison over by, and most would agree, making women have the same sentences as men, and stopping them getting lesser ones for the same crimes.
Well, I don't think all women necessarily get away "scot free," but I understand what you're saying. I was basically just picking away at the "but the double standards women face won't get them put into prison for a long time" comment, because it's not the literal double standard that puts men in prison.
Picky, I know. Don't know why I had to make a big deal of it, but I did, so there you go.



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  (#44 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 23rd 2011, 02:07 AM

Painfully sucks.


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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 24th 2011, 09:05 AM

Firstly, random ad about pizza popped up....

Second, DAMN THOSE ARE NASTY TALONS! I feel really sorry for the poor guy, and one of the comments says about doing the same to a vagina...

Well, I hope no woman has a buldge to grab.




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  (#46 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 24th 2011, 04:34 PM

You know why people are probably making jokes about the women in such events? Because as a society, we see women as harmless, weak and soft. Even when a woman does something horrendous, we just laugh at it, because the idea of a woman doing it doesn't really click. I'm not sure who people are blaming for the double stand, but I think its important to highlight the double standard comes out of the same traditional sexism that oppresses women. And it goes to show, as I've said before, traditional sexism effects everyone, and to change this, we all need to get involved. Or men will continue to suffer in silence. The problem of course needs to be addressed, but with more than just equal sentencing. Being more harsh in sentencing will not bring many more men forward, because men will still be scared people will think they are a wimp.

Also, on the whole, at least in England, I don't know about America, a lot of DV cases involving male attackers don't get particularly harsh sentences even when charged. It still seems to be dealt with through social services, counsolling and such, more than prison sentences. And many women won't press charges either.

On the topic of gender and DV. Until more recently, study of DV had began and was mostly focusing on women victims of male attackers. Why? Well, its probably because men, on the whole, are far more likely to hospitalise a female partner than the other way round (though this story is an example of where it can happen), and death is more likely too. So people started to notice these women coming into hospitals, and saw a trend. It wasn't all that long ago we even started to notice domestic violence as a society, it was largely a hidden thing. And men, for various reasons, such as fear their masculinity would be questionned, where not really coming forward with it. So it was hidden, as less were turning up in hospitals or what not. So I don't think researchers were being expicitly sexist, they just didn't realise.

However, in recent years, research has started on gender differences in DV, in terms of both victims and perpetrater. It has found that women and men are as likely to be verbally abusive, and in terms of frequency, even physically abusive (in terms of hitting and slapping, etc.). The only real difference there is the severity of physical injuries (emotional harm is about the same). Men still appear to be more sexually abusive.

Now how long will it be before society starts taking female to male abuse seriously? Who knows. History shows can take a long time for society to take on research and recognise problems. I mean, come on, in America, it wasnt considered possible to rape someone you were married to until 1993 . I would assume though, it should be quicker for recognition of this issue, as its got the foundation of all the awareness that has been raised with women so far. We know what domestic violence is, we now just need build on that.


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  (#47 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 24th 2011, 06:25 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post
You know why people are probably making jokes about the women in such events? Because as a society, we see women as harmless, weak and soft. Even when a woman does something horrendous, we just laugh at it, because the idea of a woman doing it doesn't really click. I'm not sure who people are blaming for the double stand, but I think its important to highlight the double standard comes out of the same traditional sexism that oppresses women. And it goes to show, as I've said before, traditional sexism effects everyone, and to change this, we all need to get involved. Or men will continue to suffer in silence. The problem of course needs to be addressed, but with more than just equal sentencing. Being more harsh in sentencing will not bring many more men forward, because men will still be scared people will think they are a wimp.

Also, on the whole, at least in England, I don't know about America, a lot of DV cases involving male attackers don't get particularly harsh sentences even when charged. It still seems to be dealt with through social services, counsolling and such, more than prison sentences. And many women won't press charges either.

On the topic of gender and DV. Until more recently, study of DV had began and was mostly focusing on women victims of male attackers. Why? Well, its probably because men, on the whole, are far more likely to hospitalise a female partner than the other way round (though this story is an example of where it can happen), and death is more likely too. So people started to notice these women coming into hospitals, and saw a trend. It wasn't all that long ago we even started to notice domestic violence as a society, it was largely a hidden thing. And men, for various reasons, such as fear their masculinity would be questionned, where not really coming forward with it. So it was hidden, as less were turning up in hospitals or what not. So I don't think researchers were being expicitly sexist, they just didn't realise.

However, in recent years, research has started on gender differences in DV, in terms of both victims and perpetrater. It has found that women and men are as likely to be verbally abusive, and in terms of frequency, even physically abusive (in terms of hitting and slapping, etc.). The only real difference there is the severity of physical injuries (emotional harm is about the same). Men still appear to be more sexually abusive.

Now how long will it be before society starts taking female to male abuse seriously? Who knows. History shows can take a long time for society to take on research and recognise problems. I mean, come on, in America, it wasnt considered possible to rape someone you were married to until 1993 . I would assume though, it should be quicker for recognition of this issue, as its got the foundation of all the awareness that has been raised with women so far. We know what domestic violence is, we now just need build on that.
I agree with much of your post, however one thing I'd point out with your statistics is this:

Women are much more likely to commit DV on a lower level
Men commit it less frequency but when they do commit it they do far higher levels of damage.

If you imagine the scenario where a woman hits her boyfriend a hundred times before he rips her arms off and beats her to death with it, that'd be along the lines.
Women are also something like 4 times more likely to stalk people online, which I feel is a slightly relevant statistic.

I'd also like to add a bit to your last paragraph:

If we expect this issue to change, we need to realise that feminism is not doing anything about it. In fact, I'd say they're the main perpetrators in forming this situation in which men are demonised by the media for being rapists, pedophiles and wife beaters.
   
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 25th 2011, 02:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MonsterCosmonaut View Post

Women are much more likely to commit DV on a lower level
Men commit it less frequency but when they do commit it they do far higher levels of damage.


The research we covered in my degree suggested low level abuse was about the same, maybe a bit more for women, but not far higher. Are you basing this on your opinion or research?

http://lilt.ilstu.edu/mjreese/psy290...her%202000.pdf

For example, this meta-study (it compounds and compares and basically makes averages out of a range of studies and methods, to get a fuller picture of existing research) above, found quote: "women were slightly more likely than men to use one or more acts of agression and to use such more frequently". There is no implication its anything like your example of a woman hits the guy a hundred times, and then he finally snaps.


Quote:
I'd also like to add a bit to your last paragraph:

If we expect this issue to change, we need to realise that feminism is not doing anything about it. In fact, I'd say they're the main perpetrators in forming this situation in which men are demonised by the media for being rapists, pedophiles and wife beaters.
You may would 'like to add a bit to my last paragraph', but no, you can't. You clearly missed the fact my post was a pro-feminist post. Unless the addition you propose is satire?

I wrote a long explanation about the ignorance of your proposed addition, but I figured it wouldn't help. You really need to stop and think this through. Feminism is not the cause of this double standard, the double standard stems from the same strands of traditional sexism that have been opressing women throughout the women's liberation movement. Gender roles set out by the 'paitriarchy' of the past. It's such a cop out to blame feminists, and I am sick of seeing men do it.


The issue is not that men are seen as the only ones who can be violent to their partner, but potentially simply, women are not deemed as threatening. If a men is getting hurt by a female partner, he is 'less of a man', and sympathy won't be given. How is feminism to blame for that? I don't really know of feminists trying to claim women are not capable of violence. If anything, feminists would be saying it more than your average joe?


Also, for the record, if thats what you think we are all like, I would imply you need to stop putting so much faith in that media thats been demonizing men, because they appear to be demonizing everybody (unsuprisingly.).

And if you want someone to blame for the idea all men are rapists, stop shifting the blame. Undeniably society at large plays a large part. Society and the media are the ones the prepetrate this crap that men are unable to help themselves, and they are useless slaves to their penises, exampled by all the excuses and victim blaming in rape cases, or the encouragement and status of being a 'player', or if you are unfaithful ('oh, he was made to spread his seeds'). This is stuff of society and of the media, not the feminists. You are targeting the wrong enemies.

Some feminists are unbelievably crap, man-hating, extreme, and other bad things. But these are mostly just relatively small groups, and are often ostacised from within because that not what most people are about.


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Last edited by Invert; June 25th 2011 at 02:53 AM.
   
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 25th 2011, 07:21 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post


The research we covered in my degree suggested low level abuse was about the same, maybe a bit more for women, but not far higher. Are you basing this on your opinion or research?

http://lilt.ilstu.edu/mjreese/psy290...her%202000.pdf


That's just one. I'm afraid I can't find the one I had saved from a while ago so, as I cannot find it, you might as well pretend I said nothing until I do.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post
You may would 'like to add a bit to my last paragraph', but no, you can't. You clearly missed the fact my post was a pro-feminist post. Unless the addition you propose is satire?
I didn't mean it in the way that it should be added on at the end, I meant it in the way that I would like to add a response to your paragraph.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post
I wrote a long explanation about the ignorance of your proposed addition, but I figured it wouldn't help. You really need to stop and think this through. Feminism is not the cause of this double standard, the double standard stems from the same strands of traditional sexism that have been opressing women throughout the women's liberation movement. Gender roles set out by the 'paitriarchy' of the past. It's such a cop out to blame feminists, and I am sick of seeing men do it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post



I agree, it is because of sexism. I don't believe we have a patriarchy anymore, but it is definite sexism. However, I don't believe Feminists are going to solve it, because they only care about women. They don't give a shit about the discrimination men go through because, as far as they're concerned, it doesn't matter and certainly doesn't compare to the poor girls in Africa!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post
The issue is not that men are seen as the only ones who can be violent to their partner, but potentially simply, women are not deemed as threatening. If a men is getting hurt by a female partner, he is 'less of a man', and sympathy won't be given. How is feminism to blame for that? I don't really know of feminists trying to claim women are not capable of violence. If anything, feminists would be saying it more than your average joe?
Feminism is not necessarily to blame for this happening, but it is to blame for not doing anything about it. I challenge you to find one feminist rally that was on the topic of the descrimination men go through. ONE MAJOR RALLY. I'd be absolutely shocked if you could find one.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post

Also, for the record, if thats what you think we are all like, I would imply you need to stop putting so much faith in that media thats been demonizing men, because they appear to be demonizing everybody (unsuprisingly.).


Except women. They do a very good job of not demonizing women. Children get away with it pretty much too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post
And if you want someone to blame for the idea all men are rapists, stop shifting the blame. Undeniably society at large plays a large part. Society and the media are the ones the prepetrate this crap that men are unable to help themselves, and they are useless slaves to their penises, exampled by all the excuses and victim blaming in rape cases, or the encouragement and status of being a 'player', or if you are unfaithful ('oh, he was made to spread his seeds'). This is stuff of society and of the media, not the feminists. You are targeting the wrong enemies.
No, on this one I disagree. The idea that all men are rapists is an idea with Feminism at its absolute origins, it's a Feminist ideology. Doesn't saying 'society does it' really shift the blame? 'Society' is just a word for a collective of people, and is influence by a number of things - namely, recently, Feminism. In which we see that they tell women that they have to be very careful on the streets, they should always carry some form of self defence utility, they should always be with a male friend, never let anyone buy you a drink - and the more and more they perpetrate this mass hysteria, the more and more demonized men are as more and more people begin to think every man is a potential rapist.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post
Some feminists are unbelievably crap, man-hating, extreme, and other bad things. But these are mostly just relatively small groups, and are often ostacised from within because that not what most people are about.
I very much agree. However, unfortunately, they're the feminists who are out there changing things. It's alright to sit at home and shout about how horrible they are, proclaiming no true scotsman, but at the end of the day, they're changing things and the other feminists aren't doing much about it.
   
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 25th 2011, 08:03 AM

A.) I find it hilarious that one of the tags is squeezing. Not sure why.

B.) ...Ouch.


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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 27th 2011, 05:19 PM

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Originally Posted by FutureBroadwayStar View Post
A.) I find it hilarious that one of the tags is squeezing. Not sure why.
I probably can guess why you find "squeezing" hilarious.

Maybe you were thinking of these pokeball bras . . . or maybe these NES controller bras?


Not gonna lie: All Most healthy men would agree that playing with real boobs is funnier than playing with the real NES. They do seem to make the "squeezable-ness" increases to over 9000!!!



   
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 27th 2011, 09:01 PM

I watched the video Void linked and one of the things the narrator said was "Will the kick turn his avocados into guacamole." Just felt like I needed to share that funny (funny to me, at least) tidbit. [:

Anywho, I feel bad for the poor guy. He'll probably be terrified of women the rest of his life.


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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 28th 2011, 01:59 AM

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She should be executed. Painfully.

Lol, that’s a little extreme. But if I was in his shoes, I'd hope you where the judge.
   
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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 28th 2011, 10:23 PM

[quote=VoidZN;665621]

If a woman sleeps with a lot of men, then she's a slut or a whore. On the other hand, if a man sleeps with a lot of women, then he's popular or a stud. [/quote]

Actually the term is "Man slag". In any event most people choose not to associate themselves with STD ridden diease.

Anyhow, would you rather be called a bad name like "Whore" or have a sexual part of your body exploded by death grip? I mean really.

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Re: Women are Scary: A Woman was Charged with Domestic Violence After Squeezing Boyfriend's Groin So Hard that He Needed Surgery - June 28th 2011, 10:25 PM

I just feel the need to put this out there, the sexism most certainly does work both ways, although of course that doesn't make either okay.

If a woman sleeps around, she's a whore. If a man sleeps around, he's a stud.
If a woman is a virgin, she's pure and is saving herself. If a man is a virgin, it's because he's a loser who can't get laid.
   
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