Triggering (ED): 2 free-verse poems. Opinions?

[Aintzane411]

So there's an open mic at my school this Friday and I'm trying to decide between these two poems. Please let me know what you think! ;D

My Friends, Ana and Mia
Kneel down, hair back, fingers down throat. Dinner comes rushing out the wrong end. The thoughts rush through her head, "Fat. Ugly. Fat. Gross. Fat. Fat. Fat! Not good eough! Not enough!" Society chants, "Thin-thin. Thin-thin," the sickly heartbeat of the young women of the world.

Kneeling in front of her porcelain shrine, she makes her daily offering of whatever mom cooked that night. With her stomach empty once more, she stands, wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, and flushes her sorrow and misery down the drain.

Looking in the mirror, she sees her two best friends standing next to her. On her left stands Anorexia, a tall, thin girl with sharp angles and pale skin. On her right stands Bulimia, also a thin girl, and with the same insecurities that haunt Anorexia.

Anorexia leans close to the girl and begins to speak. "Thin," whispers Ana, "Collarbone. Hipbones. Ribs. Beauty. 96 pounds isn't good enough. Thinner. Thinner!"

Bulimia leans close to the girl and begins to speak. "Fat," whispers Mia, "Purge. Think of the calories. Don't eat that, you fat pig!"

"Please," begs the girl whom they have worn down with their snide comments and bitter commands. "No more. Leave me alone!"

The images of Ana and Mia disappear from the mirror, but their voices will forever more linger in the minds of the girls who were broken by society's cruel opinion of what beauty truly is.

With a sigh, she splashes water on her face, digs up a smile to show everyone that no, nothing is wrong, and slowly turns the bathroom doorknob. Voices echo in her ears and in her heart.

Mia chants, "Fat. Fat. Disgusting."
Ana whispers, "Thin. Thin. Beautiful."

Butterflies
What is it like to be a butterfly? I've often pondered upon this subject and have yet to come up with a response that satisfies my curiosity. What is it like to float on a spring breeze that tastes like flower blossoms and looks like the gentle tendrils of ivy scaling a brick wall? It must be very freeing, no doubt. Not a single care in the world, the only worry being what type of flower should you drink sunlight from.

Yes, a butterfly's life sounds nice compared to the complicated and polluted lives that homo sapiens lead. A butterfly doesn't have to worry about money or grades or if they'll still have a roof over their head next week. They don't care for war or violence, nor do they aspire to anything more than just being.

They just are.

When I was little, I was fascinated with butterflies, especially watching the soothing way they flit about the world. Their bright colors held my eye as they winked at me in the sunlight. I would observe them closely and wonder, "What is it like to be a butterfly?"

The answer to this question lies only in our imagination. Maybe one day we will truly know what it's like to float along a spring breeze that tastes like flower blossoms, but for now, I'll have to settle with sailing through the night wind as I lie safely asleep in my own bed.

[sassygurlone]

Honestly, I like the first one the best because I can relate to it so much but school may not be the best place to read that poem. It could stir up a lot of drama and give away some of your privacy. The second one is more appropriate for a high school open mic.

[Aintzane411]

Yeah, I thought that too, but I went to the last open mic and it wasn't just people reading about school or boys or whatnot. There were a few really good poems that went into deeper topics. Hmm. I'll have to think some more I guess.

[colie18]

I really like both of these. I however can relate much much more to the first one. I do think that you should read the second one at school because reading the first one can stir up a lot of drama and you could regret it later. But it is your choice which ever one you decide to read people will still love it. I love both of them!

[Aintzane411]

Thank you! ;D I actually ended up reading the first one, and the audience seemed to really like it. I was REALLY nervous though!