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Sex and Puberty For questions related to sex, puberty, and similar topics, ask here!

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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I'm a bit concerned, - April 13th 2013, 06:49 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of rape or abuse, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Recently I was in a situation where I almost got raped. It was really very close and pretty much the only thing that prevented it was that he couldnt get my phone from me and I have a 1-button 911 thing on it.
My boyfriend and I have a /more/ than healthy sex life, and we have some kinks that can be on the more extreme side of play. I'm really worried that because of this experience I'm not going to be able to participate in things we both like, or even just regular sex for a while. Does anyone know if theres a way that I can make sure that he's happy while I take time for myself to recover?




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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 13th 2013, 11:24 PM

Just tell him what happened. If he really loves you, he will do anything to make sure you're comfortable in the relationship. Hopefully, he wants to help you and will completely understand that you are currently uncomfortable having a sexual relationship.


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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 14th 2013, 02:00 AM

We've been together for about a year, and he's said he's willing to take a step back from sexual activity for a while. I'm just worried about my uhm... Well I have a really strong need to please. I don't want him to go without just because I'm having a problem.




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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 14th 2013, 02:11 AM

Well, it sounds like he wants to help you and give you the time you need to recover. Don't go out of your way to please him if it will effect your recovery. You need to worry about healing, first, before you can worry about pleasing your boyfriend.

Also, while I'm here, I highly recommend you report the assault to the police. This way, you can get one more criminal off the street. This is a very traumatic experience, I know, and the best way to overcome it is to make sure he can't hurt you, or anyone else, ever again.


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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 14th 2013, 05:44 AM

Last time something like this happened the police didn't believe me and wouldnt pursue my case. I don't want to be embarrassed like that again so I'd rather not report anything.




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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 14th 2013, 01:04 PM

they should follow up a case like that


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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 14th 2013, 01:07 PM

Your boyfriend sounds understanding enough to let you recover before you do anything that might not help your recovery so you shouldn't feel like you need to please him and as for telling the police, I would recommend you do so because they should follow through with cases like that.
   
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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 14th 2013, 01:13 PM

i do belive he will understand you because he loves you. he will be doing it for you


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Re: I'm a bit concerned, - April 15th 2013, 07:43 AM

After talking more with him I'm pretty sure he's gonna give me time. I had a couple days where the thought of kissing him made me feel dirty, cause the last person my lips touched were the guy that was being a dickhole. But he assured me that I was beautiful and not dirty, that that guy was trash and it was just residue I gotta wash off by showing him that its not affecting me.
Although I'd still rather not report it. Apparently because I don't cry or go blank and can talk rationally about something that happened they think I'm lying, so I'd prefer to save the embarrassment.




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