Female Advice Preferred: Painful Masturbation

[RainbowBlaze]

I feel so ashamed to admit this, considering only one person EVER knows this about me, but ever since I was just a little kid (first grade to be exact), I have had 50 Shades of Grey fantasies (before I even knew s&m was a thing. I thought I was crazy until just recently). Since I started having these urges, I have been masturbating in creepy and twisted ways such as pretending I was being tortured in inappropriate ways, using tools such as safety pins or the other end of a sharpie marker on private areas, and forcing myself to hold in a full bladder. A long time has passed, and I've become used to these methods. I've tried new things, like trying to seduce my friends into performing s&m with me (im bisexual and, unfortunately for me, they are not). I want to know some unique and PAINFUL masturbation methods for girls. Nothing too dangerous, though. Thanks... Please don't judge.

[Kyeto-X]

Unfortunately, we cannot give explicit masturbation techniques out.

Also, i would advise being really REALLY careful with anything that you do. There are a lot of nerve endings and sensitive tissue down there. And you do NOT want to cause permanent harm.

Depending on what age you are, you could look into sex toys at a local shop. Tell them the type of sensations you are looking for, and they can direct you to safe toys just for that.

As for judging, as long as you are SAFE and consenting to this, I doubt me or anyone else in this site will judge. We are all open minded.

[cynefin]

Hi there,

I can promise that we won't judge you here. We're all human and TeenHelp is a judge free zone. We can't give you any advice that would allow you to hurt yourself, though. However, I can give you a few things to think about.

You're not crazy for having these fantasies, but it's interesting that you've had them from such a young age. Most first graders do not know about sex, and if they do it is learned. It's often because they have been exposed through the media, but more common that they have been exposed through sexual abuse. Do you know if anything happened to you when you were younger, or if anything could have happened to you? You don't have to answer that if you don't want to, but just think about it.

You shouldn't be ashamed of yourself, but if masturbation is becoming a problem for you (it takes away from daily activities, or you're damaging yourself) I think you should consider seeing a therapist who works with sex and that sort of thing.

[Just Peachy.]

Hey there,

We definitely don't judge here! Masturbation is a very normal act, and what arouses you is more common than you think. We can't actually give masturbation techniques, especially harmful ones. There are (non) pornographic websites out there and books that literally can guide you.

It is interesting you've had these feelings since a very young age, but that also is common. Kids experiment with their bodies, and that's okay! There is the alternative to that, where kids have been sexually abused at a very very young age that could drive the addictive behavior.

Masturbation in itself is a very natural, okay thing to do! You don't have to be ashamed of it. However, like Calico mentioned, if you think it's interfering with your daily life and negatively impacting it, you might want to consider talking to someone.

Best of luck to you

[Coffee.]

There's nothing wrong with the fantasies that you're having! Many people feel the same way-how do you think millions of books were sold? S&M can be safe and consensual in terms of sex, and as long as you're not harming yourself physically, masturbating with these fantasies is perfectly fine! As Will said, we cannot give you explicit masturbation tips, but I can give you a few guidelines to follow and tips to put you in the right direction. I'd recommend keeping any sharp objects and chemicals away from your genitals. This is just a bit dangerous. The end of a sharpie should be fine. If you're of age, I may recommend you go to a sex shop or look online for sex toys that can safely offer rougher stimulation. These can include vibrators, but also things to spice things up such as clamps or other toys-as I said about chemicals, I'd personally stay away from lubes that do heating and such, but you're welcome to experiment if your skin isn't as sensitive as mine. I can't go into too much detail, but I would check out websites or talk to a worker about these types of toys. If you're unable to buy these due to age/money, I'd think of ways to simulate these safer methods, and use fantasies as well. The brain can go a long way!