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Sex and Puberty For questions related to sex, puberty, and similar topics, ask here!

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Jess~ Offline
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sex with a small penis? - June 22nd 2017, 02:57 AM

my dude friend of like 5+ years has been begging me to have sex with him for like a year straight.
wow that sounded conceited. not exaggerating though. after i was raped, i was obviously fucked up in the head and wanted to make sure i could still be "normal" when it came to sexual activities.
so i ended up giving this guy head. unlike most of my sexual encounters, he didn't send a dick pic before or anything, so i had no idea the actual size of it. i don't want to possibly trigger anyone by using actual inches, but it was probably about an inch smaller than average. you know, definitely not the worst case scenario, but still wayyyy smaller than what i'm used to. he sent a pic a few months afterwards of him holding it, and only the tip was showing past his hand. dude's got pretty large hands, so i'll give him the benefit of the doubt, but that's still a lot smaller than i'm used to.

anyway, i don't know what i thought would happen, but yeah, turns out i could still be normal when it came to giving head. so i was all good, i used him to test something out for myself, everything was great. regretted it deeply but convinced myself that it was something i felt i needed to do to reassure myself.

so i moved on. we occasionally sent nudes over the year. he always initiated it but i really don't give a shit about nudes anymore so i just sent them for him to use. i feel like a slut saying that, but it's crazy how it just doesn't bother me who sees me naked. of course i don't just send them to anyone, but with someone who i know, i'm very open about my body. not sure if that's a good thing, because i don't want to hide it, or a bad thing but eh.

now, at the time i gave him head, he was a virgin. in fact, he didn't lose his virginity until a few weeks ago.
over the past few months we started talking a lot on snapchat, and we're actually decent friends now. (he has just been a family friend this whole time, so it's one of those situations where you're kind of forced to hang around the person because your mom's are best friends. but he's always been super extroverted when i was quiet and shy, so we never really fit.) however, now we're a lot more alike. i actually just found out we're majoring in the same thing, and going to the same community college.
nevertheless, a good majority of the times we talked ended up with him trying to get me to give him head again or have sex with him.

he thinks i only reject him every time because he's white and i've only ever had sex with black guys. but i can honestly say i have never rejected someone simply because of the color of their skin. it's actually mostly because he's so small, and then because he was a virgin/super inexperienced. even when he lost his virginity, it was in a car, and he's super tall so the positions were limited. she was on top the entire time. so he still has pretty much no experience.

however... i haven't had sex in like 2-3 months and i'm dying. plus, he offered to give me weed if i have sex with him. i've recently gotten my heart destroyed, am very sad and fucked up, and weed sounds nice right now.

SO what i'm wondering is if sex with someone with a smaller penis can still be enjoyable? i know people say "size doesn't matter, it depends on how you use it" but for some reason during sex my body seems to go numb. probably because of the rape shit idk. but because of that, i can only really feel anything when a guy is hitting my cervix and there's that pressure and fullness. i do seem to have a "short" vagina though, so i don't know if it would still be fine with him. i know the vagina expands, but i don't know if it only extends just enough to accommodate the object penetrating it, or if it just automatically extends a few inches, regardless of how big the object is. does that make sense?


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Re: sex with a small penis? - June 23rd 2017, 02:27 AM

Hello Jess,

The term you used which many "use, size doesn't matter, it depends on how you use it" this can either be false or true. It sounds like from what your wrote, size does matter for you and you have a preference for the size of penis you like.

Whatever the size of the penis is, it all comes down to a few things: are you comfortable with the person, are you enjoying their time, and are you two communicating.

Being comfortable with someone is really big in being sexually active with, if you aren't comfortable things just don't always work out the way you hoped they would. When you are feeling comfortable, you are more relaxed. Being uncomfortable, you are tense resulting in body areas to be to tense which can be uncomfortable.

Are you genuinely enjoying their time, I don't mean faking that you are having a good time but really enjoying their company and them as a whole. If you aren't enjoying the time with them, it may not end up as being fun, sometimes it can. It all depends on your attitude towards him.

Finally, communicating what you want is key to feeling comfortable and having a good time. If you aren't communicating missed dialog can happen. If you aren't communicating something with him, he won't know you like something. Communicating your needs and wants with him your experience can be very enjoyable.

Having a smaller penis doesn't mean it won't be fun. It all comes down to how your attitude is towards it, if it is positive then it will be a positive experience. If you enjoy using toys, you can always incorporate those into the time speant with him. I would also recommend doing foreplay, lots of foreplay, because foreplay is fun and you can communicate with him. Something that might be helpful is talking to him before, about his expectations and what his needs and wants are, then also share yours with him. This can help things go smoothly.

If at any point you feel uncomfortable, you can tell him that you would like to just sit and talk or ask him to leave/you leave. Feeling uncomfortable before sex won't be pleasant or helpful for you or him.

When you are aroused the vagina wall inside expands and gets longer. So, when you are not aroused your vagina isn't ready and it can be painful or be uncomfortable, as arousal will lubricate and expand which will be more pleasant for you.

I hope this is somewhat helpful for you.


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