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Sex and Puberty For questions related to sex, puberty, and similar topics, ask here!

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Question about female masturbation. - April 5th 2011, 04:35 PM

Hi guys and girls

I have a question about female masturbation. I am curious to know if it hurts you during the first time you finger yourself?

I've recently made myself a new girlfriend and we've both the same age. She is from China and I guess over there they don't teach much about sex because there is an awful negative stigma when having sex while still in high school, plus sex isn't glorified in their media compared to the NA/EU. So sex is apparently not taught very very because it is assumed that most teenagers won't even bother with it.

Last night we were making out/cuddling for about 5 hours and it eventually got further into a messaging and some sexual acts. She had told me that she has never placed anything inside of her, even her fingers(she is a virgin). At one point I had tried to place my index finger inside of her, but as soon as her vagina opened a little, she said it started to hurt. Was it because her body has never had anything in there? Or maybe it was because I rubbed her clitoris too hard before hand(which I don't believe I have)?

We both don't regret anything at all, but with my suggestion we decided to wait awhile before trying anything sexual again. I am a little worried about the pain she experienced, if she could not handle my index finger, she would definitely not handle intercourse.

Since I am not a woman and she has had very little to no experience when it comes to sex and her body, any information or advice would be greatly appreciated.
   
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Re: Question about female masturbation. - April 5th 2011, 04:41 PM

It does hurt a bit, yeah. Well, it did hurt for me. It all depends on the person though. For some people it hurts, others are fine with it.

I don't think the fact you rubbed her clit too hard could cause fingering her to hurt though, they're two separate things.

Perhaps try it again but use lube, it helps and make sure to go slow.

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Re: Question about female masturbation. - April 5th 2011, 04:45 PM

Since she's never had sex before, it's possible that her hymen is still intact with could cause pain during foreplay and intercourse. She obviously hasn't used a tampon since she's never 'inserted anything in there' before, and lot's of girl's break their hymen's by just using a tampon. So I'm just gunna say that her's is probably still intact.

The next time you do try something, go very slow and use some lube. It will make it easier to insert and ease her pain a little bit. Eventually, it will become painless and more enjoyable to her.











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Re: Question about female masturbation. - April 5th 2011, 06:52 PM

I would say that it's a fair assumption that her hymen would still be intact, she told me that she has never been in any physical activities since middle school because she'd spend all of that time studying, that and she's never touched herself in a sexual manner.

I can't believe I hadn't thought of lube.. I just assumed that her bodily fluids would be good enough. Lesson learned I guess. lol

Would her feeling relaxed help as well?


Oh and thanks for your replies.
   
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Re: Question about female masturbation. - April 5th 2011, 07:03 PM

Yes, her being more relaxed will deff. help If she's anxious/nervous about it she will tense up and it will hurt. Also, try some more foreplay before fingering her (kissing and stuff)


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Re: Question about female masturbation. - April 5th 2011, 07:39 PM

For some people it does hurt, personally it did not. yes keeping her relaxed will be helpful
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Re: Question about female masturbation. - April 6th 2011, 01:45 PM

Definately. Relaxation relaxes the muscles. If she's tensed up/anxious/nervous (or all of the above) it will be painful for her.

As for physical activities, then it is a good assumption that her hymen is still intact. Physical activities such as sports, horseback riding etc, have been known to break the hymen without anyone else's knowledge. Sexual activity is also a main one here as well. So, just assume that it's there, and you'll be the one to officially "pop her cherry" (if it ever gets to that point).

However, I do wish you the best of luck in your life and relationship and if you ever any advice or questions, feel free to PM!











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Re: Question about female masturbation. - April 6th 2011, 01:57 PM

If she hasn't done anything like that before then I imagine it would hurt because she could be tight and what not. As suggested, make sure she's relaxed rather then tensed up, plenty of foreplay beforehand and lube may also help & just take it slow.
   
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