Female Advice Preferred: Takes forever (girls) Help

[MusicFreakCaroline]

So I am a girl and I must say I like playing with myself quite a bit but it takes me forever to get to that moment (like 15 min). I am dating a guy now and he likes fingering me but I can never come. It's annoying and embarrassing that I can't come. I use a taken apart toothbrush for my alone time and I think that may have desensitized me so I have stopped using that but it still takes me forever and I get so self conscious with him. I want to be able to come when he fingers me but I can't any suggestions?

Also when he is fingering me I feel like I have to pee and I dont wanna gross him out It's not like I don't wanna have him finger me cause I really do :/

Gah its just so embarrassing how long it takes me any help would be great guys.

Also any ideas to make it taste better down there.. he says it tastes weird

[Aletheia*]

The peeing sensation is normal; the only thing you can do help that is to use the bathroom before you do any sexual activity, along with afterward. Just because you have that sensation doesn't mean it's going to happen.

Now, don't feel embarrassed. Many woman can't orgasm through intercourse or sexual activity without some other form of stimulation, like clitoral stimulation. Many can't orgasm at all through masturbation or intercourse alone. Only a short percentage of woman can actually orgasm through intercourse alone without any other forms of stimulation. You may achieve orgasm, and you may not. It's just going to take some time and patience for you to get to that point. Nothing to be embarrassed about.

[Acheron]

Originally Posted by MusicFreakCaroline

Also when he is fingering me I feel like I have to pee and I dont wanna gross him out It's not like I don't wanna do that with him cause I really do :/

That can actually be a sign of an oncoming orgasm. In fact, you might well be a squirter. Can't remember exactly what squirting juice is made up of, but it isn't urine. If you're still worried about it, go to the bathroom before sex. Then you can just let go.

[MusicFreakCaroline]

Zelo he makes sure to not leave my clit out but still its impossible for me

[Aletheia*]

It may be impossible, and it may not. It just depends on you. Lot's of time, practice and patience. Also, trying new things will definitely help.

[Verità]

The sensation you have is completely normal, I've heard a lot of people report a similar feeling through similar activities. As for not being able to achieve orgasm, this will sound corny, but if you go in with the mindset that it's not going to happen, it's unlikely it will happen. You have to have a more open mind, and don't worry about not being able to orgasm quickly. It's harder to orgasm with someone else doing the stimulation, because they don't always know what spots work best for you. Relax, be patient, and be sure to communicate with your boyfriend. Let him know what feels good and what doesn't, so that it will be easier to orgasm.

[Revolution]

So you have orgasmed, just not with your boyfriend? I think this is a comfort thing. Just get comfortable. Have you tried clitoral stimulation, or just vaginal? I can't do vaginal stimulation, I don't think I have figured out real g-spot stimulation. Although I can orgasm in sex, I believe it's all clitoral for me. So if that's the case for you, it's not embarrassing. Just make sure he knows that. He wants to please you, so let him try things out. And don't get embarrassed about it taking a while. It does for me too, 15 minutes is pretty usual for me in masturbation, though it varies. You have nothing to worry about. Pee sensation is normal too, I'm raising my hand as one person who also gets this sensation. Don't worry about it.

[Jaguar]

It's nor unusual for a girl to take 15 mins to orgasm, and most people have to be completely relaxed to orgasm with someone else. I have a suggestion though. He undoubtably knows you don't orgasm with him and I'm sure he wants you to, so ask him to hold you while you give yourself an orgasm to get yourself used to having one with him present. Then when you can do that, have him hold his hand on yours as you do it so he learns what work with you. Then when you can to that easily, guide his hand as he fingers you to teach him how to give you an orgasm. It's a slow process so don't try to rush it, and don't get discouraged if it doesn't work right away.

[Sincerely Yours ♥]

I agree that the peeing sensation is normal. As Shannon said, go to the bathroom beforehand so you know later on that it's most likely not pee. Try not to stress too much or it will just make it harder for you to orgasm. Believe me. Just let him know what feels good. He wants to make you feel good, he will have no problem taking suggestions.

[tracey1212]

just try masterbating while he is present.. thats what happened to me when my bf and i first staterd dating. he loves to finger me, but i never orgasemed, but when i did myself with him present he knew exactally what to do. try buying some vibrating toys and let him use that for a while, if he wants to...if all else fails jack him off, or give him head, and you will get horner i promise it works, and then when you are at your honest part let him finger you then...

[DeadlySin]

Consider yourself lucky. It can take up to an hour and a half for me to "get off". None of my boyfriends have been able to get me to orgasm, and they know that. I just explain that I am a bit more complicated, that I enjoy it, and for them to not take it personally. So I wouldn't feel bad about it.

Also, like everyone has said the feeling like you have to pee can mean that you are close to orgasming. That's also normal.

As for tasting better down there, about the only thing I could say is some form of flavoured lube, or have him suck on a mint while he does it. *shrugs*

Good luck.