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Pregnancy and Childcare If you're pregnant, a young parent, or have questions related to either, ask them here!

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Unhappy My Pregnancy is ruining my relationship HELP :( - May 6th 2012, 11:20 PM

Hi i am 9 weeks pregnant and ever since i fould out it has been a living hell. Before i found out me and my boyfriend were great together, we never fought or had an problems. When i found out i was pregnant he right away told me to have an abortion, i did think about it dont get me wrong but i couldnt go through with it. I have been fighting with him and all of his friends telling them i will not have anabortion. My father promised to help me with money as i am not finished college yet. My boyfriend everyday tells me how stupid i am and immature i am for keeping this baby and how he doesnt want it and that im ruining his life. He has been emotionally abusing me and continues to call me a psycho because im scared and im trying to make it work. The other day i told him i needed my space, its weird now because were together but were not. I have been trying to keep calm and not nag him so much with my crazy hormones but he still calls me names and says terrible things to me. He is always partying until late at night because of his job and one night even got too drunk and told me he wanted to kick me in the tummy and kill our baby. He always jokes around about being happy if the baby is still born, and his friends support him in treating me liek this. He is to scared to tell his parents and anytime I say we have to he backs out, we are supposed to tell them this week but we'll see if this happens. I just need some addivce and support im at a loss im on my own working and going to school because the rest of my family live in different provinces or countries same with my close friends. He is all i have and nothing is getting better. He didnt want anyone to no about the pregnancy but i told some people because i needed some sort of support and back up, but it all back fired because they all tell him im crazy for keeping it and im psycho and they feel so bad for him..... i dont no what too doo
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Re: My Pregnancy is ruining my relationship HELP :( - May 6th 2012, 11:34 PM

Honey, hes being abusive to you. NEVER stay with an abuser. He's showing you right now what kind of person he is. You don't want that type of person in your child's life, father or not. I say leave him. I know its a big step, but you are responsible for more than just your life now. You're a mom and being a mom brings on new responsibilities. If you want to keep your child, thats fine. Its really your choice and not his. You're the one carrying the baby for 9 months, not him. Your boyfriend should not be treating you like this for any reason. There's no excuse for it. You deserve a whole lot better. His friends need to stay out of it too, its not their baby. Its fine for them to give you kind advice but it sounds like they aren't doing that ether. Ignore what they say and do what you think is right. I highly advise you though to get rid of this boyfriend. If this is how it is now with him, its only gonna get worse if you stay with him and I dont want to see that happen to you.

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Re: My Pregnancy is ruining my relationship HELP :( - May 7th 2012, 01:01 PM

He is not all you have. Your dad is going to help you with money.

Do you live with your boyfriend or alone? Can you move in with your dad or another family member? How about a friend?

Your boyfriend is not treating you well at all, and you should not be around somebody who is going to cause you stress, especially while you are pregnant.

As much as you want him to be in your life and your baby's, it may be better to not have him there. You don't want him treating your baby like he is you, do you? (this is not accusing, I am just asking and trying to make a point)

Hopefully his parents will be more level-headed and be willing to help. And maybe they will knock some sense into him as well.

If not, keep in mind you have your dad who is going to try and help.
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