Becoming a Surrogate Mother

[Jocelyn.]

Whether it be a family member, close friend, or stranger... Would you ever consider it? To give someone the gift of a child who can't achieve their own?

Honestly, I've looked into it. There is a lot involved, and the pay is not that great considering the kind of work you are putting in (about $10,000-$20,000). And I believe this is not a job you should be doing for the possible rewards you would get out of it anyhow.

I'm asking this because my sister may not be able to have kids, and not too long ago she asked it I would one day have a child for her if she were unable to conceive. Right away I said yes, and don't regret my decision at all. I would do this for her in a heartbeat.

But it got me thinking about surrogacy all together... so would you?

[Nicolette]

I'd look into adoption, there's already so many children out there who need a loving family and a home. If I couldn't have children I'd go that route rather than the surrogate.

[losing touch.]

i think that's amazing that you would do that for your sister. :]

i'm not able to have children but if i do decide i want children when i'm older i'll probably adopt rather than go down the surrogacy route. i watched this programme about women in russia i think it was who made a living from having babies for other people which was kinda shocking to me.

[Melody Pond]

I think I would be a surrogate, it would have to be for someone very close to me though.

I would also want to still be a part of the child's life in some way, I understand it wouldn't be my child but I wouldn't be able to just hand the child over and never see it again.
If I was a surrogate for a family member or friend then I would still be able to see the child and be a part in it's life.
I don't think I would really ask for money either, in the UK we have the NHS so there is no medical bills, I would possibly ask for some money for maternity clothes but that wouldn't cost much...

If it was me who couldn't have children I would rather adopt than use surrogacy.

[Little_Miss_Unsure]

Hey Joce

I agree with been a surrogate mother for your sister i think it is really sweet because she can't have kids but would you feel after carrying it around for 9 months and having to go through the labour that you would want to keep and would't it be kind of hard for you to have to see it knowing that it is your child but you have chosen to give it to your sister.Maybe it would be easier for her to adopt a child becuase then it wouldn't affect your feeling and also you wouldn't have to do all this and have only money and a niece or nephew at the end of it

My inbox is always open

Charlotte

[EmisaurusRex]

I'd be a surrogate if someone asked me to.

I'm probably not going to be able to have children of my own, but I want to be a foster parent and adopt.

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

A long time ago I got asked this question and my response was no. However, I have come to meet a lot of great people; people who will not be able to have kids of their own.

Anyway, due to meeting these people and coming to love them and sharing a great bond with them I think I would be able to be a surrogate. I too would still want to be apart of the child's life but I don't think any one would have an issue with that.

As for money and all that. I don't think I would ask for anything. The only thing I would ask for was Medical Bills to be paid for. Which, in my opinion is not that big of a deal. And, depending on the type of insurance I have in the future that might not even be an issue.

I think that being a surrogate is a great idea as long as the person knows what they are getting into and what not.

[iHEAVENn]

No I will never be a surrogate mother.
-My pregnancy with my son was rough, and the delivery was actually a little more nerve racking then the doctors let on.
-I could never carry a child full term then hand it over to someone
-With all the medical risks that are out there for pregnant women, I could never put myself in a position to possibly lose my life and leave my son without a mother.

I understand some people can't have kids, and I feel bad for those. But there are other women out there willing to risk their life to help them, and there are children in adoption agencies waiting for a family.

[bitesize]

I'm not sure. If it was someone very close to me, like if my brother asked me for his partner someday or something, maaaaaybe, but I can't honestly say I'd say yes straight away (although in general pregnancy does NOt appeal to me at all.)

[Jocelyn.]

Originally Posted by iHEAVENn

No I will never be a surrogate mother.
-My pregnancy with my son was rough, and the delivery was actually a little more nerve racking then the doctors let on.
-I could never carry a child full term then hand it over to someone
-With all the medical risks that are out there for pregnant women, I could never put myself in a position to possibly lose my life and leave my son without a mother.

I understand some people can't have kids, and I feel bad for those. But there are other women out there willing to risk their life to help them, and there are children in adoption agencies waiting for a family.

This is true... I guess since my pregnancy was easy for the most part with basically no complications, this didn't really even cross my mind. I would hate for something to happen to my own family while trying to give someone else theirs...

I guess its because women rarely actually die from pregnancy related complications. But things like gestational diabetes, eclampsia and complications while delivering are very serious.

To everyone saying they'd consider adoption, I think thats wonderful! I agree there are so many babies that need wonderful families who want nothing more than a child of their own to love. But... if I were in the situation where I couldn't concieve, I will admit I'd try everything possible to have my own. There is just something about giving birth to your own child (or I guess in the case of surrogacy, someone else giving birth to your child) that I understand why a woman would try everything to experience it. I can't help but look at my son everyday and think WE created YOU, and I grew you for 9 whole months... felt your first kicks... ah I could go on forever hehe. I'll hush now

[J&M's Mommy]

I think it is great that you would do this for your sister.

As for me, I do not think I would be a surrogate. Honestly, I am not a very good pregnant person. It is not that I have had trouble in the past - aside from one miscarriage - but it is hard on me because I stress too much. My son is healthy, and hopefully my next child will be too. But being pregnant brings on a whole new set of worries. And as Amy mentioned, there are risks involved. And I can't take the risk of leaving my children without a mother either.

So, my answer is no to being a surrogate. But then again, no one has ever came to me with that proposition. I have family that has not had successful pregnancies and in fact lost two children they gave birth to. But they adopted 3 children, and I think that is amazing. So, I do not think I would ... but you can never be 100% sure without personal circumstances.

[topov]

Once upon a time I thought I would...
But being pregnant now, I love my baby. I love my bump and I cant imagine not being able to hold my little wriggler.

I never thought I would be effected by pregnancy like this.

I suppose under certain surcumstances (some one I care for being unable to have children) I might, but I would really have to detach myself from everything.

[Nicola]

I would never be able to do it. I just know I couldn't.

And if I were unable to have children, I'd much prefer to adopt than go down the surrogacy route.

[✿ Orchidaceous]

I could never bring myself to hand over a child that has been dependant on myself for such a long time, so no. I've always said that I would adopt.

[Imagine]

I don't think i would either.
Having a child in you for 9 months and not being able to go home with him/her.
Just would be too difficult for me.

[The Kira]

I think giving someone the gift of a child is the most beautiful thing in the world... i cant think of any other word... Beautiful...

[guillotine_blades]

I would. As long as the child was created by the mothers egg, not mine.