HELP! fear of pregnancy!

[confused...]

my bestfriends neice is only 13 and fears she may be pregnant...how do we help her? adoption is no option because of how young she is..and how are we supposed to get her an abortion at her age?! we need advice!

[Iris. ♥]

First things first, you need to pick up a pregnancy test. You can get them at CVS, Walgreens, or any other nearby drug store. Before you take any other actions, you need to find out if she really is pregnant.

If it turns out that she is pregnant, it would be best for her to tell her parents and the boy that got her pregnant. If that's really not an option, Planned Parenthood would be her next best bet. If there is a clinic nearby, she should definitely visit it. She'll be paired with a counselor who can help her figure out her options. Depending on what state you live in, she might be able to get an abortion without the knowledge of her parents. I know it's like that in CA, but I'm not sure about other states.

Good luck!

[Angel]

The first thing she needs to do is take a pregnancy test.

If she does happen to be pregnant, there are clinics such as Planned Parenthood that offer pregnancy counseling to those who are in situations such as hers. They'll help walk her through all her options so she can make an informed decision. If she wants to get an abortion, it's likely that she'll have to tell her parents depending on the laws in your state. It may be helpful for your friend to speak to someone older who can help her out, such as a relative or a family friend.

Have her take the test first before she makes any decisions.

[Aletheia*]

As others have said, the first thing to do is to buy a pregnancy test. She says she THINKS she's pregnant, not that she knows. You can find pregnancy tests at any pharmacy, usually near the tampons, pads and condoms.

Once a test has been taken, and it's proven positive, then you can go through the options. She's 13, but adoption IS AN OPTION. There is no age on when you can give up a child for adoption. Planned Parenthood or a doctor can provide more information and counseling services to get more information on the adoption process. She's young, and there is no possible way she'd be able to handle caring for a child at this point in time. Abortions are also an option. She'd need to have parental consent for this one, since she is only 13 years old, so adoption might be the best option for her if an abortion can't be performed.

First things first though, you need to confirm she's pregnant by having her take a pregnancy test. If it comes up positive, then you need to contact a Planned Parenthood in your neighborhood, or nearby, and ask them about their counseling services and what can be done for your best friend's niece. If it comes up negative, she may want to consider having her parents put her on some sort of birth control to keep this from happening again.

[confused...]

the only problem with adoption is she isnt mentally stable to have a child and does not want to have the child in the first place....her mother is dead and father is no where to be found..my bestfriend and her niece are living with their grandparents and if she is pregnant their grandmother will put them on the streets..i dont have a home of my own yet or i would take them in..we will buy pregnancy tests a.s.a.p but honestly dont have many options..she wants to induce a miscarriage and we are trying to talk her out of that because that can seriously hurt her

[Aletheia*]

Yes. Inducing a miscarriage is very dangerous for her, so she needs to watched so she doesn't attempt to do this. She may not even be pregnant, so this may cause more harm than she realizes. She may be experiencing what is called an hysterical pregnancy, which is where they body believes it's pregnant when it truly is not. So, getting a test done soon would be the best bet.

Since she doesn't want the child, abortion's would be the best bet. Planned Parenthood could offer you some services on where they can be performed, and how much they cost. They aren't cheat, or free so this is something else to consider. If she does go along with an abortion, make sure it's by a trusted doctor, and not some random guy saying he can perform them. That would also be dangerous to her health.

Again, after all this is taken care of, you need to consider telling your best friend to get put on some birth control of some kind, like an oral contraceptive or the implant. These can also be acquired through Planned Parenthood. There are ways to prevent this from happening again.

[Angel]

Please warn her that she would be putting her life at risk by attempting to induce a miscarriage on her own. I hardly think facing the consequences with her grandparents is as bad as risking a bad infection that could lead to death, even though they aren't very good options.