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LGBT, Sexuality and Gender Identity Whether you're LGBT, questioning, have gender identity issues, or have entirely unrelated feelings, this forum is here to help with your questions.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Nina Twin Offline
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Unhappy Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 03:43 AM

You know what the worst argument against homosexuals/bisexuals is? That it's a choice. No way in HELL it's a choice. If I could have chosen my sexuality, I would not have chosen to feel inferior to other people. I would not have chosen to have spent a great deal of my high school and college years hating myself for being attracted to girls.

I don't know if this is a rant or what, but I just wish I could be straight. My parents don't know, very few of my friends know that I'm bisexual. Even those who do know, I'm constantly paranoid are judging me - judging everything I say, fishing for reasons why I'm "weird" because I like girls. Even though they say they're okay with it, I feel like they really don't think so. And I'm afraid. What if I fall in love with a girl again? What if I want to be in a relationship with a girl? How could I even tolerate the disgusting bigotry and hatred out there that's directed toward homosexuals?

It's not fair. Life isn't fair, though, so whatever.


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 04:33 AM

Even I know it's not a choice, it is a genetic mix-up when your DNA is combined between your parents, just a genetic issue like a lot of other things such as Huntington's Disease and Sickle Cell Anemia.


   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 07:10 AM

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Originally Posted by Guile View Post
Even I know it's not a choice, it is a genetic mix-up when your DNA is combined between your parents, just a genetic issue like a lot of other things such as Huntington's Disease and Sickle Cell Anemia.
You sound like you are implying being bi/gay is a sickness... It isn't so please don't imply so.

to the OP, I know how you feel. Just forget what others think about you or if they are judging you. Embrace your sexuality!!


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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 01:50 PM

There is nothing wrong with being gay or bi. Stop fighting it and just embrace the idea?
The more you go against yourself the more you will hate yourself. Don't do that!
There is nothing wrong with it at all!
I know there are very judgemental people out there about it, but don't listen. It's your choice to love it or hate it.
If you are attracted to girls then don't fight it, just take a deep breath and tell yourself it's okay, it's who you are.
Don't stress yourself out over fighting it trying to be straight.
Or hate yourself for not being straight.
It's who you are, be happy you are you. =)


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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 01:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by cuttingsolitude View Post
You sound like you are implying being bi/gay is a sickness... It isn't so please don't imply so.

to the OP, I know how you feel. Just forget what others think about you or if they are judging you. Embrace your sexuality!!
He isnt. Thats what it is, a genetic mix up.

Dont feel bad, atleast your bisexual so you can still go for guys, just think, theres people out there who are either lesbians or gay who would wanna be straight..

It seems to me you only want to be straight to save the hassle of having to tell people, dont worry. You'll be able to 'come out' one day and you'll realise its no big deal.

Im straight - but I do have gay friends and well, this is just my take on it
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 02:50 PM

Considering I care a lot about what people think about me I've never cared about people looking at me differently for being bisexual. Maybe because I know full well it's who I am and there's a full on LGBT community out there. I don't want to change, I'm not the one with a problem, the ignorant assholes out there who discriminate against gays/bis have the problem.




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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 04:11 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Guile View Post
Even I know it's not a choice, it is a genetic mix-up when your DNA is combined between your parents, just a genetic issue like a lot of other things such as Huntington's Disease and Sickle Cell Anemia.

Are you serious? NO ITS NOT.


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  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 05:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by cuttingsolitude View Post
You sound like you are implying being bi/gay is a sickness... It isn't so please don't imply so.

to the OP, I know how you feel. Just forget what others think about you or if they are judging you. Embrace your sexuality!!
That's the way you see it, he's just trying to say It's genetic. It's up to you if you view it that way. I didn't view it that way, I'm I don't believe in homosexuality.

Hey, It sounds tough for you. I can understand that you are attracted to girls and It's not your fault. Maybe you just shouldn't care what other people think about you, you know? If you have confidence, less people are going to bother you. If you hide it, then people are probably going to pick on you and discriminate.


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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 5th 2010, 06:18 PM

I say go someplace with open minded people- new york, san fransisco ect. if u can. also read books and watch movies where there are gay/ lesbian characters. there are plenty of those these days and they portray gay women as strong, confident and classy- the way you should feel about urself
ps- no one has any real prof to suport their theorys about homosexuality... all the studies are foggy and poorly done but its not in anyway a disease anymore than having black skin or blonde hair is
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 7th 2010, 06:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by xHolyValorx View Post
That's the way you see it, he's just trying to say It's genetic. It's up to you if you view it that way. I didn't view it that way, I'm I don't believe in homosexuality.
He used illnesses to compare to homosexuality implying that it is a sickness. It is not. You not believing in homosexuality is like me not believing in heterosexuality. Its ignorant and a form of discrimination.


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  (#11 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 7th 2010, 07:52 PM

Love is a beautiful thing... something that no-one can ever take away from you or control. There's nothing about that (or anything else) that makes you inferior. Nothing whatsoever. You like girls. It's a fact, and it's certainly not something you can just choose to drop. And you know what? you shouldn't.
It's so important to both face and accept yourself for who you truly are. There are tons of people on this planet who, sadly enough, can manage to hate others just because of something as simple as their sexuality. But homosexuality isn't bad or anyone's fault. We all come in different colors and with different preferences. Anyone who has a problem with that, has got some serious issues to work out within themselves. Don't accept their twisted view though. This is your life, your happiness we're talking about. To be attracted to someone is perfectly natural, so don't waste your own time by denying yourself of / wishing away something as beautiful as love. Count it as a blessing, and roll with it. It's really all you can do, while staying true to yourself <3


if i've ever learned anything, it's to be loved.
funny how accepting and allowing that can be so hard,
when loving someone else can be so easy.
the thing is, we accept exactly what we think we deserve,
no matter what that may be.
so i'm thinking it's time to change our mindsets;
if we haven't yet figured out that we deserve the best,
then it's certainly time.
think about it ;]
<3
love,
Nev
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 7th 2010, 09:00 PM

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with being Bi and nothing wrong with being DIFFERENT in general! If I wasn't different from my friends, life would probably be boring! Unfortunately, people who are different tend to get teased or made fun of about it. However, there are likely many of your friends who will still be willing to accept you as you are. Bisexual/Homesexual, etc. are normal variations of human behavior. They are not "illnesses" and they are not bad.


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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 7th 2010, 09:31 PM

Hey Marlie

The way I see it, whichever gender someone is attracted to is their own busieness. It's not an illness or a choice, It's simply the way they are. ( e.g. I am straight for the same reasons you are bisexual ---whatever the resons are)

You have nothing to be ashamed of. The bigotry and hatred shown by others is a sign of an immature society.

Please stop hateing yourself and wasting your life, make peace with yourself and enjoy your life !!


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Everything is opposite I don't feel like stopping it. So baby tell me what I got to lose
He's into me for everything I'm not..according to you"

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  (#14 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 8th 2010, 11:05 AM

I Know How Feel, I Can't Tell You How Many Times I Wished I Was Straight.
But It Isn't A Choice.
But We Have To Learn To Accept Who We Are


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  (#15 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 8th 2010, 04:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by cuttingsolitude View Post
He used illnesses to compare to homosexuality implying that it is a sickness. It is not. You not believing in homosexuality is like me not believing in heterosexuality. Its ignorant and a form of discrimination.
I don't believe he was doing, just trying to explain it in a scientific manner..

As for the topic, Don't hate yourself for what you are. People are all different and have different personalities, different tastes different everything so why is being bi or gay/lesbian different to that, (thats my opinion)
Just be yourself, if people are your 'true' friends then they will stand by you. if not who needs people like that in your life?

be yourself. x




   
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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 8th 2010, 07:42 PM

i think its wrong that ppl think u chosoe sexuality, its part of u. and its hard to understand fro some ppl. my mum doesnt agree with homosexuality but she doesnt hate ppl. she hates the idea. but to me, love is love. i think ppl just neec to acdept each other/


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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 9th 2010, 07:40 PM

It's a hard thing to come to terms with being bisexual. I started wondering toward the beginning of my freshman year, and I didn't tell a single person until about halfway through my sophomore year. Like you, I really was NOT okay with the idea of being attracted to girls, but now I'm pretty much okay with it, and to be honest, I'm hardly attracted to guys anymore. Not saying that's going to happen to you, but I jsut wanted to let you know that you're not the only one who's felt like this. If you ever need to talk, I'm just a PM away. <3


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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 17th 2010, 07:36 PM

I understand completely. I hate myself. I hate being gay. I didn't actually read this, but from the title. I wish people would understand that it's NOT a choice. I guess we must just be born this way. Trust me, if I had the choice, I would be the straightest girl you ever met. Grrrr


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Re: Wish I were straight. - March 18th 2010, 11:26 PM

I've used that argument for years, whenever someone pointed out that it was a choice - people have been beaten, shunned, abused, and even killed because of their alternative sexuality. Why someone would choose to go through all that is beyond me.

But I can also sympathize, Marlie. I've said the same thing, dozens of times. Or, at least, "I wish I were either gay or straight - but not bi". Regardless, trying to go against who you are is, in the end, only going to cause you more pain and confusion than learning to accept and be proud of something that makes you, if not unique, then a minority.
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