Facebook questions

[himlover2007]

Okay today i went on my facebook and i saw i had a new wall post . It said " Are you gay ? xx" It was from a girl i used to go to school with and we havent really talked or seen each other in about a year . She is bisexual or lesbian (shes dating a girl and has in the past ) And being a closeted lesbian my self i really dont know what to say , not many of my friends know and neither do my parents and they are all on my friends on face book i really dont know what to do i dont know wether to just delete the post or just reply in a private message . im just a bit worried and concerned and i need some advice asap

[LittleFish]

Well, you don't have to tell her at all if you're not comfortable or ready. It's a personal thing, and if you need more time to think about it or prepare yourself, then you don't need to tell anyone else. Maybe ask why she's asking? It seems kind of weird to me that she'd randomly ask you if you're gay when you haven't talked in so long. You could reply via PM, but since she's not a close friend (or is she?), I wouldn't really see the point unless you'd be willing to take the risk of others finding out (though I don't understand why she'd randomly go around telling people about it.) Like I said, do what you're comfortable with. If you don't want to tell her, you can politely explain that you don't disclose information like that over the internet.

[Pelios]

I usually delete the comments I don't want to answer in facebook or just don't answer them. It's up to you if you want to tell her or not leave it like that and if she asks you again than maybe a private message can help if you feel uncomfortable telling her on your wall.

[bitesize]

Unless you don't want to answer, which is fine, I would reply to her in a private message. She should have realsied it can be a bit of a personal question and personal questions should never be asked on facebook walls.

[Invert]

If you aren't out, it might be worth deleting it, unless you think people have already seen the question, in which case, don't delete it, it'd look questionnable. Just be like 'lol, Its nice to talk to you again too'... like something light and comical over her randomness.

If you want to talk to her about it, either coming out, or that you'd prefer she doesn't put that on your facebook, you could facebook message her. Or say hi in Facebook chat. Catch up a bit, ask why she is asking, and if you feel like it, tell her.

Chances are if she's not really in your life anymore (and I assume your friends' lives either), and she's not straight, she's not going to run around telling people. But often some of us are curious about the sexuality of people we've known at school. Like two of my friends and I have sat there, comparing thoughts on who is and isnt gay now. We don't have the guts to ask though

[himlover2007]

Hey everyone i thought it over and i just deleted the post, if i did talk to her on private message it could end up getting complicated and she might tell people who we both knew/know and im not ready for that to happen, i told one of my friends what she put ( some one im not out to) and they thought it was a bit of a strange question to ask some one you havent talk to in forever plus

Thanks for the advice guys much appreciated

[Singing to the starlight]

Delete it and tell her in private quietly. It was quite...odd for her to ask you publicly like that.

[losing touch.]

that's odd. she hasn't spoken to you in forever then posts something like that on your wall? she just sounds really nosey to me. meh, deleting it was the best thing to do.

[Sidhe.]

Since the issue seems to have been resolved, I'm going to close this thread. PM me if you want it reopened.