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LGBT, Sexuality and Gender Identity Whether you're LGBT, questioning, have gender identity issues, or have entirely unrelated feelings, this forum is here to help.

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Kuraku Offline
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Question Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 15th 2011, 09:45 PM

Hey ppl,

I've got a question for y'all.
So I'm gay, but can I still have crushes on girls every once in a while?
Not anything sexual, but romantic crushes.
   
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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 15th 2011, 09:52 PM

I think so. I mean, in my opinion, love is love. :]

My extreme lesbian friend said this:
"If I fall in love with a guy (unlikely), then I will jump at the chance to be with him. Love is love."

EDIT:
If you fall in love with a girl, then you are bound to think be sexually attracted to her as well. :]


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 16th 2011, 12:22 AM

Hey there.

Yes, I believe that's possible. Just like straight people can have crushes on people of the same gender, same-sex oriented people can have crushes on the opposite gender.

If you want to identify yourself as being gay, that's perfectly fine.

Take care.




   
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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 16th 2011, 12:24 AM

I think you may just be bi-curious like a lot of straight people have crushes on people of the same sex. Either way it doesn't matter if you're gay, bi, straight or whatever. In my experience labeling myself to a certain sexuality makes things a bit messy. I just accept how I feel.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 16th 2011, 05:38 PM

It is not odd for straight people to have small crushes on the same sex just as it is not odd for those that are gay to have a small crush on the opposite crush. I personally think that everyone is bisexual at least a little bit. I think that worrying about fitting into some silly label would limit you. Just like whom you like



   
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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 16th 2011, 09:02 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Avada Kedavra View Post
I think you may just be bi-curious like a lot of straight people have crushes on people of the same sex. Either way it doesn't matter if you're gay, bi, straight or whatever. In my experience labeling myself to a certain sexuality makes things a bit messy. I just accept how I feel.

I agree. If you find your self often times crushing on the opposite gender; then perhaps there still posses the chance of you being bi sexual/curious.

But what like Ceilidh said, labeling your self often times leads to much confusion.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 16th 2011, 09:50 PM

No, you're bi-sexual. Straight means opposite sex, while homosexual means same sex. Heterosexual ≠ Homosexual. But it's okay to be a bi-sexual.



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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 16th 2011, 11:31 PM

I identify as a lesbian, and I find myself having crushes on guys every now and then. =]
It's totally natural, and I always tell myself that if one of my crushes ever turns out to be more, hell, I'd go for it. Happiness is happiness. If you're feeling this way, it's for a reason. You never know.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 17th 2011, 07:35 PM

Yes, most people have crushes on people of both sex's at times in their lives. It's just natural, that's why a lot of people are bisexual/bi-curious. But yes you can be gay and have crushes on girls!


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 19th 2011, 07:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brandon View Post
No, you're bi-sexual. Straight means opposite sex, while homosexual means same sex. Heterosexual ≠ Homosexual. But it's okay to be a bi-sexual.
Umm, im gay but I still have some feelings for girls. Its possible.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 19th 2011, 08:05 AM

I would say it's bi-sexual personally. Because homosexual means to me only liking the same sex such as heterosexual means only liking the opposite sex.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 19th 2011, 08:35 AM

Yes it is totally possible. And as others have suggested you may be more bisexual/bi curious?
Or perhaps that doesn't define you either as sexuality is not something that falls rigidly into a specific category. Sexuality is a very fluid thing.
   
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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 19th 2011, 02:38 PM

I personally believe that at teen stage, you can fall for anyone. And many proved that. As someone above said 'love is love'. This is the time to adjust yourself and follow your heart. Labels are more for adults who know everything. You might be bisexual or just bi-curious. It's yours to choose. No matter what though, love will always be possible towards both genders. Don't think you should skip that.
To answer your concrete question, a gay guy can have crushes on girls, but not sexual attraction.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 19th 2011, 04:44 PM

You could be bi, or you could have exceptions. I have a gay friend who actually fell in love with a girl, he just chose not to put a lable on his sexuality to uncomplicate things.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 22nd 2011, 05:20 AM

As others have said, you could be "bisexual." Personally I range, very fluid from a 2 to a 4 on the kinsey scale. But, you might be a 5: "Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual."I'm internet friends with a guy who identifies as gay but gets turned on by women too. Labels only came into existence recently, ancient times? Labels didn't exist.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 22nd 2011, 07:57 AM

yeaaa you can like theres nothing wrong with that but your probally bi but thats if you like girls and guys and not just only guys you know.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 23rd 2011, 08:10 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sythan View Post
Umm, im gay but I still have some feelings for girls. Its possible.
I'm not sure I understand the concept. I don't have feelings for other men because I'm straight. If I had feelings for other men, I'd be potentially bi-sexual. Why can't you just call yourself bi-sexual because that implies you like both men and women? Doesn't make sense to call yourself gay, liking your own gender, and turning around saying "oh and I have feelings for girls too." The only way it would be possible is if you were bi-sexual.

Quote:
As others have said, you could be "bisexual." Personally I range, very fluid from a 2 to a 4 on the kinsey scale. But, you might be a 5: "Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual."I'm internet friends with a guy who identifies as gay but gets turned on by women too. Labels only came into existence recently, ancient times? Labels didn't exist.
Wait...what? An eye is considered a label. There's labels for everything. Certainly labels have existed in ancient times.



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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 23rd 2011, 11:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brandon View Post
Wait...what? An eye is considered a label. There's labels for everything. Certainly labels have existed in ancient times.
An eye is a label? How? Bisexuality on the kinsey scale is clearly labeled a 3. Whereas there's a lot that fall somewhere else on it and only have a description. Therefore someone could say 'undeclared' and still be right in their own mind or prefer to be undefined. It doesn't fall into a narrowed box. People are who they say they are, not what box society says they should be. In ancient times sexuality wasn't seen the same as it's seen today. If you were to go into ancient greece and ask "are you gay? are you straight?" they'd have no idea what you were talking about.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 25th 2011, 08:57 AM

Quote:
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I'm not sure I understand the concept. I don't have feelings for other men because I'm straight. If I had feelings for other men, I'd be potentially bi-sexual. Why can't you just call yourself bi-sexual because that implies you like both men and women? Doesn't make sense to call yourself gay, liking your own gender, and turning around saying "oh and I have feelings for girls too." The only way it would be possible is if you were bi-sexual.
For 1 or 2 girls do I have feeling for, and they are close friends. I am attracted to my own gender, I have little to no feeling for the opposite gender save for the 1 or 2 girls I mentioned. So yes, its entirely possible to be completely Gay/Lesbian, and still have exceptions.


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Re: Can a gay guy still have crushes on girls? - March 25th 2011, 08:36 PM

There are no guidelines about being gay/lesbian. So yes, you can be a gay guy and have a crush on a girl. Yes, it's normal. No, you don't need to change the sexual orientation you identify with. If you feel comfortable calling yourself a gay man, stay with that, you don't have to call yourself bisexual or bi-curious.
   
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