My way out of the closet

[SarahsSong]

I am a lesbian. I was so scared,when I told but it is who I am. There is no getting around it. I just turned 17 when everyone found out. I tried to tell myself that I was just making everything up. That I was not attracted to women at all. Then I found out that, I was just denying the truth.

I am growing up in a very conservative Christian household. My step-dad was the youth pastor. My mom and step-dad are on the church's committee. I was the girl on the worship team that sang to God every wednesday. I was the one that everyone said "She is going to make a difference in this world for God". What a difference I made.

I am the church lesbian. I hear them talk about me in their whispering church voices. But I am the person I am and if you have a problem with that then you can answer to me. My mom has told me several times before I told everyone that I was a lesbian that "All gays are going to hell". I was so scared to tell here my sexual orientation. I was her little girl. I was her favorite. I was going to let her down. I was her disappointment.

Why shouldn't I be a lesbian? Every man in my life had hurt me somehow. I have been raped,threatened, emotionally and physically abused. What did they expect?

Women are different. They get me. They held me the way I needed them to. They are gentle and soft with me. Every touch is like magic. No man has ever been like towards me. Yes, men had looked at me with there eyes in that seductive way. Telling me that they wanted me, but I didn't want that. I will NEVER want just sex. I want love,and tenderness. I want someone to look at me with love and not lust.

I wanted to touch and be touched. I am a women that needs love. What was so wrong with that? I do not believe that God is so merciless that he would deny what I needed. I craved love and women gave it to me. I am a lesbian.

[colie18]

I am sooo proud of you!!! You stood up for what you are... you are done denying and that is the truth!!! you are who you are and you are proud!! I couldn't be prouder!!! You are right.. god made every person for a reason... and he made them who they are for a reason... he made you to show people what it is like to be proud of who they are... you are such an inspiration!!! God made you to be you and only you... the real YOU!! <3 I LOVE YOU!!!! NEVER EVER CHANGE!!!

[ChrisB]

As am I proud of you for comming out. I know how hard it can be, I have come out a total of 5 times in this order Bi/Lesbian/Pansexual/Trans/and Trans again after going back on the first one.

I know that it can be scarey especially when you live in a very religious house hold. But I am so proud that you have come out to who you are its a beautiful thing.

God loves everyone....EVERYONE....God doesnt make mistakes so your sexual orianation is not a mistake, you are loved by everyone here at TeenHelp. You may one day change someones life. You are a strong couragious beautiful woman, and keep striving forward in life because you are going to go far.

Our sexual orientation or gender identity is not something that we choose, it chooses us. and some people may never understand that, but just be true to you and everything will be just fine.

again i am so very proud and this makes me so happy

if you ever need anyhting please do not hesitate to ask..ever!

[enfantreve]

Beautiful <3 Amen! :')