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katriena99 Offline
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Unhappy Boyfriend and lies - June 24th 2012, 05:49 PM

I've been dating this guy for 7 months now. Both of us love eachother but the problem I have with him is that he's not honest with me. He lies to me frequently with minor things. Like when he's hanging out with his friends, he tells me that he napped all day and that's why he didn't text me back. Or that he was home. I don't know why he lies if he's just hanging out with his friends. And I don't want him to smoke and he even got in trouble for that. But he still does. And finally, yesterday, I went to his house without telling him I was coming to surprise him. I went to his front door and called him and asked him if he was home and he said yes. And then when I told him to open the door, he hesitated and said he's actually at his friend's. I've caught him lying to me like this (minor things) a lot of times but even if all this is minor, I just can't trust him anymore. So I broke up with him for this reason. After that, he said that he can't change what he did in the past but if there is something he can do to change my decision. What should I do? Should I go back to him? Did I make the right decision? Please help me, I'm very helpless right now
   
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Re: Boyfriend and lies - June 24th 2012, 06:50 PM

Hey, i believe you made the right decision. If he was lying to you the relationship wouldnt work. It might be small things now but later it could be worse because it could lead to him cheating as he knows he can get away with it.

Its still your choice, you could try againa and see if you trust him and decide then.


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Memento mori - Remember you must die

Memento Vivere - Remember to live

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Re: Boyfriend and lies - June 24th 2012, 09:01 PM

If it doesn't work the first time, it's not going to work the second time.

You said you don't trust him anymore because he lied about the most simple stuff to you. If you don't trust him, it's going to be hard to be in a relationship again, because relationships build on trust.

He had his chance and he blew it. You'll find someone that won't lie and that deserves your trust.



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Re: Boyfriend and lies - June 26th 2012, 06:17 AM

Hey there,

First of all, I want to tell you that you did the right thing by breaking up with him. I know it might be really difficult because of the fact that you love him, but any relationship that is built on lies is not going to last and is going to end in heartbreak for easily one or both of you. If he only lied once or twice, and you both worked through it, I would say to give him a second chance. But here, he seems to be continually lying to you, and now after he's lost you, he wants you back. There is a good chance that a lot of what he's saying to you now is empty promises and he actually won't stop lying to you. More than likely, the lies will just get worse but on bigger and bigger things.

So I think you made the right decision here, so good job. I know it's going to be really hard for you as you try to move on and heal from his lies. But stay strong, you can do it. If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to PM me.

~ Angelica


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