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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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  (#41 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 19th 2009, 05:40 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stormofthelightsbane1 View Post
what are you about?

Perhaps a relationship.

Last edited by NuHalo; April 19th 2009 at 06:56 PM. Reason: Rude.
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  (#42 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 19th 2009, 06:39 PM

They will be awesome if I have anything to say about it :P


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  (#43 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 19th 2009, 06:55 PM

Okay first of all, everyone, lets stay on topic and keep the judging to yourselves, he came here for advice on what to do and we should give him advice based on our opinions, not throw the opinions in his face. Alright?

Quote:
Originally Posted by LifeSong View Post
My advice? Wait.

Now, I'm NOT saying you shouldn't be friends! I think you should! You should hang out and be friends with her, but as far as an actual relationship goes, if you really love her you should wait.

If you care about her, give it time. She's young and so are you! Plenty of time in your future to date and be serious. For now? Just be casual with her. Wait a couple years, till shes 14 or 15 and completely ready for a relationship. It'll be worth the wait, trust me. Because if you think shes worth it and you don't wait, there's a much greater chance your relationship will fail until you're both older, more mature, and know what you want.

So... I think you should tell her that you want to have a relationship with her, you really do, but that you think you should just be friends until shes a bit older. If she loves you... she'll wait for you
This was the best peice of advice I saw in this thread, I'm sure alot of people will agree with it and it is a great wording for what I think you should do as well. Ultimately, it is up to you, but this way... you still get to be around her and such, and you won't jeapordize anything in the future if you wait.

Brendan, you're a good guy, I can see that.. I'm sure you would treat her well. But, if you have some patience and she really wants to wait as well, im sure it will all pay off in the end.

Take care, and good luck,

Shaun.


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  (#44 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 19th 2009, 07:28 PM

When I was 13 I was with someone who was 16 and the age gap there's the same if not worse as he was legal. You say you're going to wait for sex and that you wouldn't pressure her into so I honestly don't see a problem with you seeing her.


   
  (#45 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 19th 2009, 08:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by monstermanx View Post
They will be awesome if I have anything to say about it :P
Except a relationship involves two people, so really, you don't have all that much of a say about it.

You came on here for advice, at the very least listen and consider what people are telling you, or next time, don't ask for advice.

I wish I was 15 again, back then I had all the answers too.


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  (#46 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 20th 2009, 09:25 PM

Looks like you would have to wait a little longer because when she's 14 she can only have sex with a 16 year old, you would be 17(Maybe, I think) Just wanted to make sure you don't get into any trouble


Age of Consent Under the Criminal Code of Canada
Age of Consent
The age of consent to engage in sexual activity of any kind is 14. A child under age 12 can never give legal consent to sexual activity. A person between the ages of 12 and 14 can only give consent if:
The other person is 12 or older, but under the age of 16, and is less than two years older than the person giving consent: a 12 year old can consent to sexual activity with someone who is age 14, but not age 15
.
The other person is not in a position of trust, or authority, such as a teacher, a minister, a doctor, a babysitter, a relative.
To engage in anal sex, both people must be 18 years of age or older, or married to one another.


http://www.avaloncentre.ca/ageofconsent.htm
   
  (#47 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 20th 2009, 11:22 PM

Just do whatever makes you happy. =]
I think that the age difference is a bit of a big difference but in like 10 years, she'll be 22 and you'll be 25 ... it really doesn't seem as big a problem.
But i do also agree with most people here, it's probably not love. Not yet anyway.
Wait a few years until you decide you're in love. =]


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  (#48 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 21st 2009, 02:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by wtp View Post
Honestly, screw people online. If it's alright with yours and hers parents, and it's legal, then there's no reason not to.
Agreed!
Its not the most brilliant idea to let people tell u this and that and get in the way of your happiness, honestly-if i were a guy and i liked a younger girl, id talk to her parents and ask the permission to date her, i know it sounds cheesy but its just a respect thing, and then give it a shot if they give you permission--PM if you want any suggestions


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  (#49 (permalink)) Old
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This kind of sucks! - April 23rd 2009, 11:42 AM

Hey,

So... Yeah another relationship thread by me... I know.. I suck at this shit! Well anyways here's what's up. The girl I like, her name is Kaitlyn and I'm going to her house today possibly for the night but I live like five miles away so I have to stay afterschool to get there and I never really hung out with her before. She then tells me "Tell Amanda you and I arn't hanging out anymore she really wants to meet you and it's an early birthday surprise for her I guess to see you!!" So done that and I was kind of looking forward to alone time with just Kaitlyn but that obviously isn't happening. So, now I got to balance the attention between the two and some-how not show one more than the other how I feel :P

Anyways, not where the problem comes in. I was supposed to fight tonight but part of the deal of her going out with me (We're not yet she wants to see if I can commit and change and wants to take it sow, she's for sure worth it!) That I can't do drugs or drink... So I don't do drugs or drink... Then now it's fighting but it's either I don't fight and I'm called a pussy and I get jumped or I do fight and I don't get Kaitlyn.

Now,
That's not even really the problem. Bigger problem is one) She's 12 and I'm 15 and two) I don't know where to go with all this, do I see other girls (Not that I want too but I mena... Gotta have a little fun) do I have to call her every night?

Ah.. I'm used to getting a girl like the snap of my fingers and the rest is easy as pie... I will admit I like the thrill of the chase!


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  (#50 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 23rd 2009, 05:33 PM

Again.. please just update threads you already have if they pertain to the same subject, kay?

Merging, again.


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  (#51 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 23rd 2009, 06:27 PM

I'd focus on being friends... hang out a lot, go to the movies, go for walks, play games, talk, but because of the age difference and you are the guy and older, you should probably shy away from doing much more than holding hands or putting your arm around her. it might also be an idea to talk to her parents about it and ask their permission??? no sure how you'd approach that, though...



PM me any time, ok? I'm always here to help.



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Just in case the government takes away the first.
   
  (#52 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 23rd 2009, 07:14 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rican Roll View Post
I just wanted to quote this for the TC's benefit, because it is absolutely true.

You're 15, you're not in love, you're infatuated. She's 12, she doesn't love you, she's infatuated. If you really want to enter a relationship with her, go for it, but please keep what Jack and I have said in mind. If you enter a relationship with your current mindset, you're going to be hopelessly crushed when it all comes inevitably crashing down around you.

That is so true. Not trying to be pesimistic but....

I'm not trying to judge. I was 11 and dated a 16 year old. It was great, exept from the reactions of everyone else, which were bad. Then, he said he didnt want sexual, other than hugs and kisses. 6months in...he was telling me he loved me, and touching me. I wasnt sure how to stop him. I was 11...isnt this how relationships are meant to go?

Just a warning really.

Personally, i think its totally wrong, no matter how mature she is. In fact I have to wonder about your maturity to want to date a 12 year old.

One more thing. Is she nearly 13? Have you only just turned 15?
Or is she just turned 12, and you nearly 16?

because that can make a big difference. I mean your talking about the difference between just over 2 years, and nearly 5 years which makes a massive difference



Last edited by Stuckinhell; April 23rd 2009 at 07:21 PM. Reason: Multiple posts have been merged automatically.
   
  (#53 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 23rd 2009, 07:53 PM

I'd say go for it, although even when I was 15 I wasn't even attracted to 12 year old girls... I wouldn't personnally date a 12 year old at any age.

To the above posters, just let him do it. Let him live his life, make his own victories and his own failures. If he wants to date her, and she wants the same, even if she is really just too naive to date, let them! It'll be a life experience for the both of them. Whether it'll be good or bad, she'll find out that it's awesome for a younger girl to date a way older guy, he'll find out that it's "fullfilling" to date a way younger girl. Yes, I put fullfilling is quotation marks, for obvious reasons.

Again, let him make his own victories and failures. His victory, he'll have a girlfriend and experience this important aspect of life, although it's too bad it's not with someone a little older. His failure might end up being ridiculed, or in jail.

Last edited by Work_In_Progress; April 23rd 2009 at 08:03 PM.
   
  (#54 (permalink)) Old
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Re: This kind of sucks! - April 23rd 2009, 08:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by monstermanx View Post
Now,
That's not even really the problem. Bigger problem is one) She's 12 and I'm 15 and two) I don't know where to go with all this, do I see other girls (Not that I want too but I mena... Gotta have a little fun) do I have to call her every night?

Ah.. I'm used to getting a girl like the snap of my fingers and the rest is easy as pie... I will admit I like the thrill of the chase!
1. well i've already said earlier in this thread, that it's not a good idea and you seem to want to go ahead anyway

2. uh so do you like her or don't you?
Kinda lost me when you said "Do i see other girls..i dont want to...but i want to have a little fun.."
um how much exactly do you like this kaitlyn chick? enough to say you ike her and mess around with girls on the side?
If i were you I'd work out if you actually like her before hurting a 12 year old girl .
Personally if a guy told me he liked me and wanted to date me and had been hooking up with a diff few chicks a week ago i'd be v suss, esp if he was in an age diff like yours (considering maturity levels are v different at 12 & 15, then say 40&43). by all means kiss other girls if you want to..let her know though what you're doing, and that you want to have a little fun while you wait around for her, i can assure you she won't react all that positivley.

3. um no you dont HAVE to call her every night. i'd assume since you want nothing sexual from her thugh, that your relatoinship will involve a lot of talking though, and you should probabaly WANT to call her often. maybe not everynight, but nothing should be a chore that you havet o do.
   
  (#55 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 23rd 2009, 10:54 PM

If you love her this much. go for it. be prepared for the worst though. It may ruin your whole relationship with her. Or you may become the happiest person on earth. you never know until you try though
   
  (#56 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 26th 2009, 04:35 PM

Okay, if you really like her, then just check the laws and, if it's legal, drop everything that has to do with age there. Talk to her a lot and develop a friendship with her. Maybe she likes you, too. I'm 13 and my boyfriend is 17. As long as you are not going to try to rape her, why even think about the age. Of course, you two are going to think about things differently and different things are going to be important to you, but that comes with every relationship; no two people are exactly alike. I guess what I am saying is, if you really like her, go after her. She might like you, too. Maybe, talk to one of her friends about her and you liking her. You might be surprised. Hope that helps! :]
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  (#57 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 26th 2009, 09:48 PM

If she's really the one, just wait until she's at least thirteen or fourteen.
   
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I'm really falling for her =D - April 29th 2009, 02:30 PM

Hey,

So I had to create another topic. Just let this one be, moderators, please.

So, some of you might know this much so far: I'm 15 and I like a girl who is 12! Well, yesterday I hung out with her and her friend and it was actually the best day of my life. It made me do a lot of thinking, and I know I felt a strong connection with her, a real one, like as if all my problems fade away when I'm with her and it's just me her and the world. The only thing that held me back from making a move, was her friend. It's all good, I needed to think some more anyways to see if I'm rushing things.

I'm going to be hanging out with her tonight, after track and field and Sunday I plan on maybe taking her to the beach, holding her hands and telling her how I feel... Sound good?

Here's the situation I'm at now. I'll put it in easier to understand bits:

My good friend doesn't like the girl that I like, and I'm hanging out with that good friend today before I hang out with the girl I like and I'm scared that they'll get into some arguement and I'll have to choose?

Last-night I told her how I felt on MSN, which was a big mistake but she said some good things back that lead to the possibility of her liking me back but I'm just not that sure... And I'm scared if I rush things or anything like that that'll screw it up?

So,
TH, what'ya think? :P

I really love this girl... I don't want to lose her!


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  (#59 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... - April 29th 2009, 02:51 PM

Merged threads again...

Please keep updates to original thread instead of starting another one. Thank you.

If there is an update, try editing the tite with [Updated: XX/XX/XXXX] with the X's representing the date.


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Last edited by NuHalo; April 29th 2009 at 02:59 PM.
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  (#60 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... [updated!] - April 29th 2009, 03:03 PM

Brandon, I've gone ahead and updated the title for now [before I saw Shaun's edit, pfft ]. Before the reset, I'm pretty sure users aren't able to edit their own titles. I'm not sure if that's still the case, but if so, there you go. If not, edit it yourself.

Good thing your best friend isn't dating the girl then, right? Sure, you should take his opinion into consideration, but obviously don't let that be the deciding factor. You need to let your OWN heart decide, becaure you're the one it's going to be affecting if you date her. However, since I haven't given my opinion in this thread, I really don't know how comfortable I'd be dating a twelve year old, myself..I know they say that love knows no age, but in some cases, I think it should. Be careful!



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  (#61 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... [updated!] - April 30th 2009, 01:52 PM

seriously, i think this is a bad idea, i'm sorry i know you love her and everything but she is 12! and you are 15 i was a 12 year old girl (and a mature one at that) and when i was 15 i dated 15 year old boys and trust me mature 12 year olds are not on the same page as 15 year olds.

that and have you thought about both sides of the friends, when i was 16 i was with a 26 year old (okay i was above legal and it was a much bigger age gap but the same basic principle applies) his friends wouldn't accept me because i was just a silly little girl in their eyes and my friends wouldn't accept him because he was a creepy older guy.....just think about it
   
  (#62 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... [updated!] - May 1st 2009, 03:20 AM

Just though I'd say... sophomore in high school dating a sixth grader... doesn't sound particularly right to me...


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  (#63 (permalink)) Old
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Re: She's 12... [updated!] - May 1st 2009, 03:36 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scout View Post
Just though I'd say... sophomore in high school dating a sixth grader... doesn't sound particularly right to me...
Agreed. If it was my little sister dating a sophomore, I'd be infuriated. Looking at how guys act around me (considering I am a sophomore) I would be a little more than suspicious.

However, it sounds like the maker of this thread has made a decision- so more power to you.

Have a happy life.




   
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