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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Jake Offline
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We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 04:32 AM

I'm just gonna copy and paste our arguement, since it was on a social networking site.. I wasn't planning on talking to her, since that's what i said i was going to do.. But yeah she contacted me..

I feel horrible. I'm just going to give her space and when she's ready to talk to me, she will...

But heres how things went..
Quote:
(The start is kind of irrelevant and you probably won't understand it, i just put our whole conversation here.)
Her:


You changed the Muse ship thing


Me:

You need to stalk my profile more often, you would have noticed sooner.

Answer my question which you so ever kindly ignored from last night, I'll consider re-launching the ship (Y)


Her:

Nop.. Its okay nao cause everything is jusht perfectly amazing.. Don't relaunch the ship, just put.. Or Amy shall drown you, after agree..or something. XxX


Me:

Nopeeeeee

Muse - Host

Epic song.


Her:


Yeah, Don't disagree.. Or Amy shall drown yo' cracka ass.. xXx


Me:

Nop.

I just wanna run awayawayeeayeeay

Song is teh epicness.


Her:

WHUT ALBUM. \()/ Tell mehhh. AND DO EHT.


Me:

Newton Abbot Demo.

Song understands me, never really got it before.

Nop.


(Important bit starts here)
Her:

Copy n' paste meh some Lyrics.


Me:

Hurr


Iíve read you well
I just want to get away
Cause you used my love
I just need to get away

My trust in you has been abused
My trust in you has been overused

Sick of this space
Wish we could be far away
Cos I wasted all my youth
Iíll never see it again

My trust in you has been abused
My trust in you has been overused
Kill you everything
Cause you've bled me dry now
I just wanna run awayawayeeayeeay
Cause you've bled me dry now
I just wanna run awayawayeeayeeay

I just wanted too much
I wish we could be far away
And if my wish comes true
Youíll never see me again


Never noticed how deep it was before


Her:

I almost cried


Me:

You cried and you know it.
I probably would too, every time it plays. Triggering.
But for some reason my eyes don't have that feature.

Shame.


Her:

Shup Jake. Ima sorry.. xxx


Me:

Oh yeah?
For what.


Her:

You know why.


Me:

I wanna know exactly what you're apologizing for, bit confused.

Do enlighten me (Y)


Her:

Oh fuck you. You wonder why it didn't work out.


Me:

That makes no sense. Considering the reason it didn't work out, so many times; is related to YOU.

Not my pissy attitude towards your half hearted apologies after wards.
I have every right to be pissed off, considering every time i put my trust into you. I was told "sorry" because something new had come along.

Well I'm sorry for being pissed off, if you feel its unjustified.


Her:

Nothing to do with me babe, all to do with your complete ignorance, rudeness. You're an utter creep. Everytime I talked about one of my boy friends I got "Uhhh uh whats happening with us" Because you just didn't understand they were friends. You reminded me of why I broke up with you! I never had my own time.. And Yeah you're right, they were half hearted.. Look for somebody different Jake. We just aren't supposed to be with eachother. At least i've realised that.. And moved on.


Me:

Oh, well sorry for being paranoid. If you were a boy, you would understand. I really think you would.

If you had a problem with me, you should have brought it up. Instead of letting it progress and probably worsen, but i obviously didn't mean that much to you that you would try to fix things. Positives don't outweigh the negatives, i suppose? Easily replaced, clearly.
Well that's fine, but yeah you're right.
At least now that you've made it clear for me.

Every time something fucked up, i was ready to just quit on you. But i cared, so i gave things another chance. Time and time again, i thought "this isn't worth my time". I really thought you were, but i suppose I've been listening to bullshit.

You really should re-consider your definition of love and really, really think before you go telling people you love them.

You didn't love me, well not how i loved you anyway.

I've had my say, I'm off.


Her:

You don't know how many times I just let things slide and thought It'll get better.. Just let him figure it out.. But you didn't. You meant alot to me.. And you still do, I just got confused..yet again. Because at the end of the day my emotions are fucked enough as it is and I just didn't need the type of relationship you wanted from me. I Love You.. But I Know its only as a friend.. 2 weeks ago you were all I talked about.. Then somebody sat me down and told me what was gonna happen if we got back together & I put it off. Thank Fuck I listened, for the first time in my life I took someone elses advice and it landed me here. I Don't regret that one bit. Because if I had have been stupid again I wouldn't have found who I did.. And they make me happier than i've ever been tbh. Talk to me when you learn to speak to people.. In about 2 years, yeah? I Can't stand rude, ignorant pricks.


Me:

I'm not fighting with you, I don't want to.

Me asking "Whats going on?" That was my way of trying to make sense of things. I guess i was expected to just pick up on everything myself, i don't see why you couldn't have just re-assured me. That's all i needed.

I could say mean stuff too, but really its not gonna get me anywhere.
I don't wanna hear about whoever it is you're talking about, I'll just feel more shitty.

I don't really see what makes me rude or ignorant, but okay whatever.. and I guess.. I'm sorry for not being good enough.

Don't know what to say anymore.

But that's all i wanted to say, so have fun with life..
Bleh...

Last edited by Jake; April 24th 2009 at 06:01 AM.
   
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star_crossd Offline
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 04:43 AM

Im sorry Jake
Though I am kind of confused with the convo...


Yesterday I saw you kissing tiny flowers
But everything that lives is born to die
And so I say to you that nothing really matters
And all you do is stand and cry.


Music is life. Start living.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Jake Offline
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 04:45 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by star_crossd View Post
Im sorry Jake
Though I am kind of confused with the convo...
What don't you understand? :\
   
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 04:59 AM

Just like the background between you two. Cuz at first in the convo you were just fine and talking about the lyrics and then BAM, fighting. Is it always like that when you guys talk?


Yesterday I saw you kissing tiny flowers
But everything that lives is born to die
And so I say to you that nothing really matters
And all you do is stand and cry.


Music is life. Start living.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Jake Offline
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 05:06 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by star_crossd View Post
Just like the background between you two. Cuz at first in the convo you were just fine and talking about the lyrics and then BAM, fighting. Is it always like that when you guys talk?
No, see the reason i told her about the song is because i was trying to express to her how i was feeling. 2 days ago she told me, yet again she didn't feel the same about me anymore. I decided i wasn't going to talk to her anymore as i was only getting hurt. Today she talked to me.

The song is about someone who is in love with someone and they betray them, time and time again. Eventually, they realize it was a waste of their time and then tries to get over them. But can't seem to do it and just wishes they could be as far as possible from that person because they keep going back and getting themselves hurt and they can't help it.
Showing her the song i meant it in relation to us 2, of course.

That's how i felt, that's how things were and i showed her the song. She's pretty bright, she picked up on what i was saying straight away and understood the lyrics.

She tried to say sorry again, as she always does and i didn't accept it. Went on from there.
   
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 05:09 AM

Oh, okay, I see. Blah, that really sucks. I hope you guys can resolve things some time Do you think you ever will?


Yesterday I saw you kissing tiny flowers
But everything that lives is born to die
And so I say to you that nothing really matters
And all you do is stand and cry.


Music is life. Start living.
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
Jake Offline
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 05:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by star_crossd View Post
Oh, okay, I see. Blah, that really sucks. I hope you guys can resolve things some time Do you think you ever will?
A friendship? I think we'll be friends again.. Eventually. We have a lot in common and we generally really do care about each other.. So its just a matter of time..

A relationship? From what she's saying it seems like a relationship with me was what she wanted, until someone talked her out of it somehow. Now she's met someone new, as far as i know she isn't in a relationship with anyone. But she's obviously found someone who makes her really happy.. and after this? I guess the unspoken problems we had have been spoken about and we both know how the other feels now.. I suppose the foundation is there for a relationship to be built on, but the chances of it happening and whether i think i should/if its a good idea or not?
Kind of slim and i don't really feel like a relationship between us would work right now. At least not until we've sorted out our problems..

So i guess only time can tell.. We have a very weird love/hate relationship which jumps around a lot.. We tend to get to the loving side pretty easily, then the hating side kicks in and stops our relationship from becoming an official "Boyfriend/girlfriend" type thing.. We get tired of each other or whatever don't really talk or have a fight, then for whatever reason we come back to each other.. Every time and the cycle repeats..

I was talking to someone in PM earlier and i realised a good way to explain our relationship.
Quote:
stockholm syndrome -> metaphor for relationship;
The person is treated badly by the friend/lover, but can't stop coming back. could also be a two way thing, both friends/lovers argue with eachother and split up etc. but keep coming back together - something they cannot control.
I don't know if we'll ever have a relationship, or at least a good one. This happens so often.
   
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 05:30 AM

Wow, that sounds crazy, although maybe thats just me cuz I've never dated before...
But if you keep coming back together somehow....maybe one day you'll reach a good balance between the love/hate thing and you can be in a stable relationship.


Yesterday I saw you kissing tiny flowers
But everything that lives is born to die
And so I say to you that nothing really matters
And all you do is stand and cry.


Music is life. Start living.
   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Jake Offline
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Re: We had a fight.. and everything came out.. - April 24th 2009, 05:37 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by star_crossd View Post
Wow, that sounds crazy, although maybe thats just me cuz I've never dated before...
But if you keep coming back together somehow....maybe one day you'll reach a good balance between the love/hate thing and you can be in a stable relationship.
Nah you're right. It is crazy, most relationships aren't like this though luckily. So don't you worry

And yeah, one can always hope.. I suppose maybe one day when we both think we're ready we can come to some kind of agreement and try stop the hate from kicking in or i guess we could just fight through it together rather than constantly 'breaking up' (Although we aren't actually together as such, its the same thing.)

I dunno, but i can always hope so. :\
   
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