how do I tell my parents

[liddy]

So I met my first boyfriend online on tumblr and he's helped me try and recover from self harm and depression and im helping him too.im 14 he's 17 we skype like eveyday and I love him so much how can I tell my parents cos I want to meet him and I know he isnt some kind of paedo how can I tell them because we have been going out for 2 months now its long distance and I just love him so fucking much and this wouldnt be something weird like we wouldn't break the law you know but how can I tell my mum

[Adam the Fish]

Hey Lydia,

I think you definitely need to discuss this with your mum. You also, however, need to respect her decision if she says that you aren't allowed to meet him. Remember that she's doing what she does to protect you (whether that's coming with you first time, or not allowing you to go at all, etc.).
Try just asking her. When you're alone, just explain the situation and ask her about meeting him.

I would personally have to (and sorry, I know you don't want to hear this) question your complete safety. Have you ever used any video calling services such as Skype? That would mean it would be a lot harder to disguise yourself online if he is anything to worry about, because as much as I'd like to fully trust everyone on the internet (and your judgement), there are risks out there and I'd be incredibly concerned about a 14 year old meeting a 17 year old who she met on the Internet two months previously. You can take a look at some good eSafety tips on ThinkUKnow.

Please be careful and keep safe, and definitely discuss this with your mum before making any plans. I would also emphasise the importance of at least having seen this guy on a Skype video call before even considering meeting him in person, which could be dangerous.

[Satine]

I agree with Rachael. It would be great for this to be a completely safe situation where you could meet him without any risk, but there is a possibility he's not who/what he says he is. It makes sense to put some safeguards in, and if he is who you believe him to be then he'll agree to this.

Just in case you feel your mum is unlikely to be as supportive, rational and kind about the relationship as you need, please consider who else you would like to ask for help with this. A teacher, an older sibling, a trusted neighbour, an aunt... Whoever you think.

Take care, and I hope everything goes well.

[liddy]

Yes we do video chat on skype like everyday