TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives


You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Heathen Offline
Beauty and Bedlam
Jeez, get a life!
***********
 
Heathen's Avatar
 
Name: Jordan
Age: 29
Gender: Female

Posts: 5,431
Blog Entries: 608
Join Date: January 6th 2009

I think I've caught the feels - November 29th 2019, 03:41 AM

I've been sleeping with a friend of mine for about three months now. It was the perfect arrangement, really. We were friends who have sex on occasion. I was a few months out of a significant longterm relationship and didn't want anything to do with attachments or emotions or love. It was simple and nice. But I've realized in the last few days that maybe my heart is ready without my head because I think I have developed feelings for my fwb.

I have no idea how he feels about me. I know he loves me as a friend. We care deeply about each other. But I don't know if there's a romantic component there. He still goes on dates and tells me about them if there's a funny or interesting story so I think I'm still in the friend category because he's never called what we do a date, but I don't know.

I guess my question is: do I say something? I like what we have going (casual, low-key), but I am also an honest, straightforward person and I like to be upfront about what's going on, especially when it comes to relationships. I don't want to risk rejection, but I also kind of want to know where he stands. However, I also lost a friendship recently with someone I used to date (we broke up several months ago) who I was friends with for a long time before we got together. I'd hate to lose this friendship because of something as lame as catching the feels.

So what do I do?



The moon asked the crow
For a little show
In the hazy milk of twilight
No one had to know
The moon asked the crow...
  Send a message via Yahoo to Heathen  
Reply With Quote
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Serendipity. Offline
HelpLINK Mentor

Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
Serendipity.'s Avatar
 
Gender: Female
Location: -

Posts: 359
Join Date: February 11th 2019

Re: I think I've caught the feels - December 2nd 2019, 09:38 PM

Hey Jordan, I am sorry you have not received a reply yet. I don't know much about what's been going on with this new person; but I do know you got out of a long-term relationship a few months ago. Whether or not you're still rebounding from that previous relationship is really something you need to ask yourself. I know you continue to struggle to accept your former partner has moved on, so that is one thing you should consider before speaking to your friend.

You've been through quite a bit in the past few months, breakup with former partner and few hospital visits. The latest was a pretty big one, and you are still in recovery from that even if they aren't helping you as they should. But the point is you've begun to see a bit of clarity, and maybe that post-hospital euphoria of something like "okay, I've got my shit together now" could be having an affect on your thought process. I know you were supposed to hang out with your friend last week but plans fell through, and you were very disappointed; so that could definitely triggered this.

Now, in a more general sense (not just specific to you) it's always tough falling for a FWB; especially if you've communicated about boundaries and expectations. As I said at the very beginning, I would wait it out for a few weeks before approaching them. When you do, ask it in the hypothetical; don't just come out and say it. If he seems inclined for more details, then tell them.

Again, sorry for the delayed response. Best of luck!


HelpLINK Mentor Community Mentor Articles Writer Newsletter Editor

   
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
caught, feels

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.