Female Advice Preferred: Cheezy relationship..

[zeyn]

Well, I just had a boyfriend... (it's a secret to my family though).. It's my first time but he already had a girlfriend before me so he's experienced. The problem is I can't handle him using cliches and cheezy lines every time he texts and talks to me. I'm a little uncomfortable with it but I'm not saying I don't like it. It just sends chills down my spine and I get flustered so easily. I don't know if he notices it, but I really don't like it even though as a woman I should be happy, right? But why can't I? He's used to it since he already had a relationship before, probably it worked before, but it won't for me.

It puts me off so badly that I just want to tell him to stop it, but I'm a little afraid to hurt his feelings since I like him after all. I just don't like him being that cheezy... Now I feel so awkward around him. When he does it, I always look away and change the topic and I hate doing that. Do guys really enjoy saying stuff like that? What should I do?

[Mel]

I'm a fan of the cheese, personally. If I wasn't, though, I think I'd do one of two things:

1. Talk to my partner about it.
2. Accept that they're cheesy, then embrace how different we are.

If it's getting in the way of your relationship and how you feel around him, though, you should be honest with him. If you don't let him know how you feel, it's quite possible that you'll just continue to get more and more uncomfortable with him. And, well, being very uncomfortable around your partner isn't really too good for the relationship.

In any case, just let him know that while you care about him and like (or love) who he is, that cheesy just isn't what you are about. Let him know that you get flustered and don't know what to say. Be honest and open. I'm sure that he'll appreciate the honesty.

Good luck.

[PSY]

You shouldn't have to pretend that you're okay with it, nor should you have to change the subject every time he drops a cheezy line. =P

Are there any cheezy lines he uses that you DO like? If so, then tell him you'd prefer he stick to those lines, and avoid the others, because they make you uncomfortable/flustered. If you don't like any of them, then let him know. What works in one relationship won't necessarily work in another relationship. Some people, for example, will give their first girlfriend a certain pet name, but their second girlfriend may HATE that name, and want to be called something else instead (or nothing at all).

Like Mel said, it's not good to let this continue, if you're not comfortable with it. Better to tell your boyfriend now than in one year, when you've reached your snapping point. =P Perhaps, with time, you'll become more comfortable with cheezy lines... but this early in the relationship, it'd probably be best to stick with what's most familiar, then ease your way into experimenting with new things.

[BrittanyBoo]

dont act like its nothing, becuase it is something, and just because he used it on other girls..then he uses it on you..tell him how you feel.
if my boyfriend did that to me :/ well, id be pretty upset.

so just talk to him about it & tell him how it makes you feel

-Brittany

[alysaurus]

For some people, if you've already had a relationship, there are some habits that are hard to break. I doubt he's intentionally treating you the way he did his old girlfriend - he's probably just got used to saying whatever he says to you that he doesn't realize he's treating you as if you're the same person as his ex.

Just because you're a girl doesn't mean you should like it. Every person is different, and for that matter, every relationship should be. Don't feel as if you have to conform to the 'perfect girlfriend' who is oh so flattered with everything your boyfriend does. You still have to keep your individuality, right?

If it makes you uncomfortable, bring it up to him. He shouldn't be offended by it. You could even tell him that you dislike it playfully, like replying playfully, "I've heard that before!!" Make sure you don't come off as annoyed when you say this, even if you are. It would be silly to start an argument about this, so keep it casual even when you tell him you wish he wouldn't be so cheesy.

Good luck!