he is so out of my league, but what i'd give to have a guy like him...

[ghostflowers]

after being pretty much used by my ex i've managed to collect myself, and i've been liking a new guy. we've been talking almost daily on myspace for a few months, we like the same music and everything, and he's in a couple of my classes. but we only occasionally talk in person and it's just that joking around insulting kind of stuff and he actually gets mean sometimes. he's really handsome, but he's really shy i think, and way out of my league. he isn't a manwhore or a flirt, however, there are other girls he could go after that are so much better than me. nevertheless i can't help but like him, and i want to tell him how i feel somehow but i have no idea how to go about this. i was thinking about having one of my friends or one of his friends (i'm fond of a few of his guy friends) try to hook us up, but i don't think that would work because i want it to sound like i have no involvement whatsoever, you know? should i be this embarassed about having a crush on him? how should i express my feelings? please help me.

[iDream]

How is he out of your league? If you want to actually start dating him then you're going to have to make a move eventually. So many times I've been too shy to do anything, so I miss my chance. You can ask if he wants to hang out after school sometime just as friends. Nothing to lose there. :] Good luck!

[PurpleMustang]

Hi there,

Relationships are certainly not easy to deal with - especially when it's up to you to make the first move. I would try to avoid getting a third party involved with your relationship but ultimately, it's up to you. You need to do what you feel most comfortable doing - even if that means bringing a friend into the situation to try and help you out.

It seems like you have become close friends over the months that you have been talking, which is a good sign. It also seems like you have quite a bit in common which always helps make things a bit easier on you. Why not asking him to hang out sometime? Perhaps, you could ask him to have lunch with you at school or go to a movie or something - whatever you like.

I think you need to develop more confidence in yourself. I don't know why you think this guy is out of your league but in my opinion, no one is out of your league unless you think they are. All you need to do is realize that you are a good person and that any guy would be lucky to have you, and you won't feel inferior for much longer. I understand that is easier said than done, especially when it comes to relationships and dating, but try.

If you don't bring up this courage and confidence that we all know you have, you may lose him as a potential partner. In addition, if you keep all of the courage and confidence you have deep inside you and disallow it to shine, you may lose out on a lot of things in life. You need to believe in yourself. You need to love yourself before anyone can love you, as cheesy as that sounds.

Good luck.

[ghostflowers]

thanks guys (:

[DegReg]

Don't worry about the other girls. He talks to you, not them (as far as I know). Some people, especially if he's shy, find it easier to talk in an online or texting format. He may just be so nervous in real life that he defaults to that meanness and insult humor because he doesn't know what else to say and doesn't want to look like an embarrassed idiot in front of you.

[losing touch.]

try and have a bit more confidence in yourself. stop telling yourself that he's out of your league [why do you think that he is, out of interest?] just because there are other girls out there that he could like doesn't mean that he doesn't like you. if you talk daily then i'd say that's a pretty good sign that he at least likes you as a close friend. talk to him more and be a bit flirty, see how reacts to it. maybe arrange to meet up? go to the movies or bowling or something -- something relaxed, nothing too serious. maybe even make it a group thing with a few other friends.

[anarchy_07]

You know, nobody is out of anyone's league. That's your insecurity talking. To be honest, I think you should just be upfront with him. Let him know you like him. If you're afraid of his reactions, try flirting a little and see how he reacts. I personally don't like getting friend involved. That tends to make things awkard. Anyways, go with your gut instinct. If you feel having friend get involved is the way to go, then go for it. I hope things work out .