A Few things bundled up into one.

[BabyIndia]

Half of you know I'm with a guy and we are getting married next year, and his mother hates me and all that.


Tbh I'm sick of the arguing over this wedding.

His mam
My mam

It's annoying me so much!!

He's annoying me, never spends any time with me now, always out with freinds.


The other night was my beltaed birthday party, as i wasnt well, we all dressed up as naughty school girls, and I asked him what he thought, he told me i looked like a slut I don't get how I did, Yes i was wearing a shirt with buttons undone, but had a vest underneath it and a big tie, I also had a skirt on but with really thick black tights, and hardly no make up on....

Any way's he was doing the entertainment for this party as he's a dj, we all went to a mates up the road to get ready and have a drink, around 7ish our taxi arrived, and we went to the pub, his ex gf was in there :@ she hates me btw. anyway when we walked in she started laughing at us, i already felt like crap, so asked my boyfreind if i could have the keys so i could get changed into something more comfortable, he argued with me saying no i wasnt allowed i had to stay in the pub looking like a slag

I Stormed out, shortly my freind followed me, and tryed to cheer me up, at this point i just wanted to go home tbh, he came out through a pair of shoes that he'd brought with him at me, and the house key, ,told me he wanted me out.

I stormed off with my freind, she waited downstairs and i went upstairs, he eventually came up and said he was sorry and all that, i got changed was still a school girl but with trousers on so i felt better.

We went down to the pub and had a canny night.

Next day he was like i cant belive you went out looking like that, you looked a mess.

He's really annoying me atm it's doing ym head in, i need space away from him, but everytime i go out he threatens im not allowed to come back ive got nowhere else to go at all and he has to come with me. i only get two nights a week away from him which you'd think is enough but it's just not.

We moved intogether on the understanding that everything would be halved.

I've ended up doing all the house work, looking after the dog, and basically running after him, and he wonders why i get so pissed off.

We waiting on our claim being sorted as we both not working atm, he's going to claim for me, and reckons that the money shouldnt be halved it's all his he will pay all the bills out of it and I'll get 10 a week, that deoesnt even cover my petrol..

Everything should be halved, the bills should be paid out of it, then money for petrol then halved between us both.

He doesnt see my point.

It's really getting me down

Maybe this should be in thew why me section I duno really..

[MacGuffin]

Honestly, youre thinking of marrying this guy? At best, he sounds rude, unsupportive, and lacking in compassion. At worst, he sounds completely controlling. You're only allowed two nights a week away from him? Im sorry, but youre a grown woman. You can make the decisions about where you spend your time, who with, and what money you need in order to get by.

I would really think twice about this relationship and take all the stress coming in from so many sides as a sign. This kind of thing isnt going to magically get better if you get married. In fact, it sounds like it got worse once you moved in together, which is always a bad sign that things are headed on a downhill path. It might serve you well to rethink your priorities in this relationship, and whether this is the kind of behavior you want from a future husband. It sounds like he needs to grow up, and you deserve someone who can treat you better. In the end its your choice, but I would really rethink it .

[PSY]

I completely agree with Jordan!

[Spellbound]

I agree with Jordan. If he's making you unhappy now, then marrying him is not going to make things any better. It is your choice, but think about how he's making you feel. I'm sorry that you're feeling so down lately

[BabyIndia]

Thing is when he's nice, he's really nice and I love being with him.

But when he's nasty I hate him

He's stopped taking tablets so maybe thats it

[PSY]

What kind of tablets, if you don't mind my asking? Because I'd strongly suggest he get his health issues (whether they be physical or mental) sorted out PRIOR to your getting married.

I'm speaking from personal experience here... my father married a woman with bipolar disorder. She went off her medication (without talking to ANYONE about it) two years into their marriage. He considered divorcing her around that time... but convinced himself that the good times were worth sticking around for. Of course, with untreated bipolar disorder, the bad times are REALLY bad... but he was so desperate to hold on to those good times, that he stayed with her for two more years.

I understand that you love him, and I'm not saying that you should leave him just because you're going through a rough patch in your relationship... but I AM saying that you should wait until EVERYTHING is sorted out, before you legally bind yourself to him through marriage. If that means getting him back on his tablets, or seeing a marriage counselor, or writing up a pre-nuptial agreement, or opening up separate bank accounts, then so be it. Don't wait until AFTER you're married to take care of these issues.

[BabyIndia]

It begins with a S but Pronunced Serocat i think.

He says it's for depression but he takes them for issues inside his head..

It's just trying to get him to take his tablets again, everything was fine and dandy when we first started going out cos he was on his tablets.

He stopped taking them because they made his nose bleed, i kept telling him to go see his doc and he would sort it out, but he wouldn't.

He's worse now he twitches and mutters...

I'm having a talk with him later, letting him know I love him but i'm not happy.

[WillO'Wisp]

OK, you cannot marry this guy! He breaks you down and makes you feel like crap, he thinks he can control you and you are not his posession, he cannot control you, you have a mind of your own. This isn't a healthy relationship and you must have family or friends you can move in with. Start saving up money from a job and find your own place, but don't marry him. You always have other options, you don't want to be tied down to someone like this for the rest of your life. You deserve so much better.

[PSY]

Seroquel? That's an antipsychotic, usually used to treat schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. It's usually used along with some kind of antidepressant. If he's not taking this medication, then you could be facing some serious problems. Seroquel is used to help with the chemical imbalances that contribute toward severe mental disorders... so until he finds a medication that works (and that he TAKES AS DIRECTED), I would postpone the wedding. PLEASE don't wait until you're married to him to try and "fix" him.

[ShimmeringFaerie]

I'm sorry, he threw a pair of shoes at you? He told you that you look like a slut? He wouldn't let you get changed? He won't let you go out on your own? He is taking complete control of money that is actually yours? And you are completely unhappy in this relationship at the moment?

You need to get out of there. This guy sounds emotionally abusive and controlling. I don't know if not taking the tablets is the problem, but that's not the point. You say that he is nice sometimes, but I honestly don't think that's worth the extent of the bad times. I am sure that you have other places to go. Your friends sound like nice people, and I'm sure that your family would support you. It's very possible that they already think this guy is treating you horribly, they just haven't wanted to say anything.

I was in a similar situation to you with a controlling guy like that. Let me tell you that it only gets worse, it only gets harder to get out of, and the whole experience stays with you a long time. Please let me know if you need to talk to someone .

[kitt]

Hi again, i think i found what your trying to decribe, its an anti depressant known as paroxatine, look it up on wikipedia x

[BabyIndia]

It's serocat.... it's an antidepressant used for treating nosebleeds and adhd.

I told him i wasnt happy with the way he was treating him and if he kept it up i was going to leave him for good, and i wasnt going to come back.

He got upset and said he was sorry for the way hes making me feel, he said that he was feeling his self the night of the party but still didnt give him any excuse to be like that.

He's now back on the tablets and everything is perfect, i told him if he dint get medication id alos leave him.

Everythings fine now, back to how it was when we were first got together which im really pleased about

Thanks everyone for your help.

[ShimmeringFaerie]

That's really great . But just be careful, okay? If he goes off his medication again or starts treating you badly, make good on your promise, and just leave.

[BabyIndia]

Oh I will, I've told him to postpone the wedding aswell, just incase, and he seems pretty fine with it tbh..

so meh yeah.

Someone on here is messaging me horrible things about him, saying my partner will end up hitting me aswell