Is it possible I resent her for these things?

[JakeSim]

Let me first say that I hve anxiety and I obsess about every little thought.

Well she's my ex now but when I was going out with her she did 2 things in the relationship that I really didn't like but they all had reasonable answers.

One was that she went to a sweet 16 and didn't want to invite me even though she wanted me to go because she felt really uncomfortable asking to take me because she only knew one out of the five girls hosting it. She also thought it would be awkward for me because there's a lot of kids I may not know there. I told her how I felt about it and she asked me "do you just not want me to go" I knew she really wanted to go so I couldn't just say "no I don't" to her. The thing that just really bothers me about this is that she grinds with other people when she's dancing and I know it's just dancing but it does bother me. She said she was just going to dance with her guy friends and no one random and that she will tell me everyone she danced with. It still seemed to bother me.

Second is that she didn't want me to sit with her at lunch like 2 times. I told her I don't mind the second time (not sure I did the first time). She didn't want me to because she though it would be uncomfortable for me because I didn't really know any of the girls sitting at her table. I told her it was ok and that I don't care really, but she said she didn't hear me say this. I talked to er about this after and she was just like "oh I didn't hear you say that, sorry" then she said I can sit next to her everytime at lunch after that. I still felt a bit mad.

Is it possible I resent her because of these things. I can't come up with answer of that because of my anxiety and I truly can't tell what I feel about it. I know these 2 things really ticked me off when they happened but we talked about them all.

Would this bother anyone else so much like it did to me? Am I over-exaggerating? Is it possible my anxiety makes it worse than it really is?

Oh and I told her I really wanted to go to the sweet 16 with her, maybe that's why it bothered me. I don't know, I just really don't want to resent her if that's what I'm doing here.

Oh and the type of dancing she did was dirty dancing like I said. I don't believe i said exactly that I don't want her to dance with other people. I said I feel uncomfortable and I don't want you not to go. And she told me a little later into the conversation that she doesn't just want to go to the sweet 16 and not do anything because that's what the sweet 16 is for, dancing. But I told er I didn't want her not to go because I thought that would be controlling.

Should I not be mad because I didnt say that exactly? Or should I be? I do feel mad about it but I really don't know if I should be.

Like she said, she only did with her really good guy friends and she told me there's nothing to worry about because she really likes me ad wants
me and I still felt bad.

I'm sure if I asked her not to go she would agree not to but like I said I didn't want to feel controlling and I know she might be upset or mad possibly. But I'm sure she would understand.

[DanielR]

Dude... she's your ex, GET OVER HER.
You've been posting here since you ditched her, and we've all told you if you love her... get back with her or otherwise move on.

Let her be mate, you're beginning to obsess. As it stands, you are HER ex.. keyword EX. That means that she no longer dates you, you no longer have a right to be jealous.

In the words of beyonce (of all people)... "If you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it"...

[JakeSim]

Originally Posted by DanielR

Dude... she's your ex, GET OVER HER.
You've been posting here since you ditched her, and we've all told you if you love her... get back with her or otherwise move on.

Let her be mate, you're beginning to obsess. As it stands, you are HER ex.. keyword EX. That means that she no longer dates you, you no longer have a right to be jealous.

In the words of beyonce (of all people)... "If you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it"...

Sorry man, and I know I have been posting about this. But I truly do like her but I needed to get out of the relationship to fix myself first. It doesn't mean that I don't like her at all, it means that I need to better my health before I can satisfy us both.

But I am trying to figure things out as time goes and possibly get another shot with her. Of course this is my anxiety kicking in again.

[DanielR]

ASK her if she wants to get back together... if she doesn't... then move on.

Forget anything else (such as silly questions about her dancing with other guys)... just do whats gotta be done.