TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts


Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr Hotlines

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!



Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Tear Grants Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Tear Grants's Avatar
 
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Posts: 5
Join Date: May 25th 2010

Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 1st 2010, 03:28 PM

So, I've been dating my bf for almost a year now. After the first month or so, he refused to let me "top" and doesn't do blowjobs. I don't wanna sound like all I want is sex, but when we do have it, I would like to feel something. What happens now is either he tops or I blow him and then we're done. His reasons for not letting me do anything is that "he doesn't like it." He says he feels bad about saying no all the time and I've been trying to be patient about it to see if things would change, but they haven't, so I finally just suggested that if he doesn't want to, I could just do that with someone else not because I don't love him or cuz I want to, but also cuz I wouldn't have to bother him about it. It's not like I'd be doing it with random strangers either. A couple people I've done it with before live by me. I just want him to be happy without me having to pretty much live the rest of my life without having sex, but I don't wanna cheat on him or break up with him over this.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
StabMyHeartLover's Avatar
 
Name: Casey
Age: 20
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in my head O_o

Posts: 482
Join Date: January 8th 2009

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 1st 2010, 03:57 PM

If you where to go with other people that would be cheating.
Maybe their's a reason why he doesn't want to do anything or he's just lazy.
To me if your willing to do all the work & he's not theirs kinvda a problem their.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Tear Grants Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Tear Grants's Avatar
 
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Posts: 5
Join Date: May 25th 2010

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 1st 2010, 04:18 PM

Yea, his reason is that he doesn't like it. I don't wanna force it on him, but I don't wanna go the rest of my life without ever getting off either.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Jocelyn. Offline
Now fight.
I've been here a while
********
 
Jocelyn.'s Avatar
 
Name: Joce
Gender: Female
Location: Paradise

Posts: 1,135
Join Date: January 28th 2010

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 1st 2010, 06:10 PM

Hmm that's a tough one... I can definitely see where you are coming from. He's getting all of the pleasure out of sex and not giving in return. Not fair at all. Unfortunately there isn't really much else to do besides tell him how you are feeling :/ I've had a lot of sexual frustrations with mine and I let him know about it lol. I take it he won't even let you penetrate him? I mean... if he doesn't like it then I guess there isn't much you could do. But maybe ask him if he can touch during or something along those lines?

Sorry I couldn't be too much help... Good luck though. You deserve to receive as much as you are giving though...


When reality is a prison, your mind can set you free.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
xxpaigiexx Offline
Up In The Clouds...

I've been here a while
********
 
xxpaigiexx's Avatar
 
Name: Paige
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Location: London

Posts: 1,307
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 1st 2010, 09:57 PM

Hey,
A relationship is about give and take, it does sound like all you're doing is the giving and not getting anything back out of it. I'm sure your boyfriend does OTHER things you appreciate but sex and being sexual with someone is important. I think when someone does all the giving it does get to the point where you're not getting much enjoyment out of what you're doing.
Maybe just try something slightly different, nothing that your boyfriend doesn't want to do, but just try and switch things up a little bit and maybe that could help your boyfriend to become a little bit more confident, or adventurous.
You know your boyfriend better than any of us would so do something different and maybe he'll return the favour?
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
AmberS9109 Offline
I'll Be There For You =)
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
AmberS9109's Avatar
 
Name: Amber
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Location: Wisconsin

Posts: 245
Join Date: June 8th 2010

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 1st 2010, 10:06 PM

Well being with other people IS cheating... but I know how you feel. My boyfriend doesn't like me on top (he said I'm not the greatest at it) and he doesn't like going down on me (but that's only because I don't shave EVERY day). Maybe you should communicate with him more to see if there's something you can do to get him to like it.



Two is better than one.
Amber + Stephen ♥ 11.15.09
  Send a message via AIM to AmberS9109 Send a message via MSN to AmberS9109 Send a message via Yahoo to AmberS9109  
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
ChelseaSmile Offline
They Were Wrong
Average Joe
***
 
ChelseaSmile's Avatar
 
Name: Chelsea
Gender: Female
Location: Somewhere I don't want to be

Posts: 125
Join Date: June 30th 2010

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 1st 2010, 10:18 PM

Hmm,
Well it sounds like a tough situation.
I understand how you don't want to bother him about it, but honestly if I were him and you told me you could do it with other people I would probably be upset about it.
Its a good thing though that you don't want to bother him about it, and that your thinking about what he wants.
Maybe just try talking about it with him more.
-Bryri
  Send a message via Skype™ to ChelseaSmile 
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
PSY Offline
Hugh Jackman ♥

TeenHelp Addict
************
 
PSY's Avatar
 
Name: Robin
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Location: Southern California

Posts: 9,050
Join Date: June 12th 2009

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 2nd 2010, 01:46 AM

Sex isn't everything in a relationship... but if you feel like you're not compatible, and that it's hurting your relationship, then I think you need to either convince him to reconsider his stance and be more open to pleasuring you, or you need to give up and find someone else. I mean, why WOULDN'T he want to make you feel as good as you make him feel when you give him a blowjob? Sounds like he's being rather selfish, and I don't think anything he could say would justify his actions.





   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Tear Grants Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Tear Grants's Avatar
 
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Posts: 5
Join Date: May 25th 2010

Re: Sexual frustration with my bf (gay). - July 2nd 2010, 06:16 AM

Just some notes on the past couple posts:

--Paige--He hates anything abnormal. If you don't learn about it in Health class, he won't do it.

--Amber--I want to tell him how I feel, but I don't wanna make things awkward between us.

--Chelsea--I didn't ACTUALLY come out and say it like that. I kinda brought it up in a joking way to see how he'd react. It's not something I wanna do, but it crosses my mind when I'm in a mood.

--PSY--I don't think sex is everything, but it is something when you're a 19-year-old college male with a hormone disorder. Plus, we're compatible in absolutely every other way, EXCEPT when it comes to this. I'm not saying it's ruining the entire relationship. It's more like I feel like he doesn't care about the way I feel about it, and yes, he is very spoiled, albeit it's mostly because of me. I try to give him everything he wants cuz that's just how I am towards everyone, i hate being an inconvenience and I like making everyone else happy regardless of my feelings, but I just expect SOMETHING from my boyfriend in that department.
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
boyfriend problems, frustration, gay, sex, sex sexual urges cheating, sexual

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off





All material copyright 1998-2014, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.