TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts


Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr Hotlines

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!



Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
semiller3 Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
semiller3's Avatar
 
Age: 22

Posts: 2
Join Date: August 25th 2010

trust issue? - August 25th 2010, 04:47 AM

okay so i'm in college and my boyfriend is still in highschool so we really don't get to see each other that often. but, when we skype he always wants me to show him my boobs. and i just can't for some reason. he thinks it's because i don't trust him. but i do trust him; i wouldn't be in a semi long distance relationship with him if i didn't trust him. and i don't think it's because i'm like, self conscious or anything. because i like my boobs, haha so idkkkk what's wrong with me. i let him see them when we're together, i just think it's weird over skype. which is dumb, but idkk that's just how i am i guess?
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Member
I've been here a while
********
 
ShimmeringFaerie's Avatar
 
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Posts: 1,990
Join Date: March 22nd 2010

Re: trust issue? - August 25th 2010, 06:13 AM

I don't think it's a trust issue at all. I mean, you would know if it was. I trust my boyfriend completely, but I wouldn't undress for him on webcam. Partly because you never know who could accidently walk in, partly because I would be a little concerned that spyware or something like that could get the footage, and partly because I think it's a little bit degrading.

But really, it shouldn't matter why you think it's weird. The fact is that the idea makes you uncomfortable and that you don't want to do it. You don't need to justify that to anyone. It kinda sounds like your boyfriend is trying to manipulate you into doing it by saying "oh, well, obviously you don't trust me". It's quite childish actually. Next time he asks, I think you should just tell him that you don't want to do it and that he needs to respect your decision. If he asks again or tries to manipulate/pressure you, I would just hang up on him until he realises that he is being ridiculous. It's stupid for him to want you to do something that you are uncomfortable with just to prove that you trust him.



PM me!

Dreaming about the day
When you wake up and find
That what you're looking for
Has been here the whole time.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
DarkSeph Offline
Member
Experienced TeenHelper
******
 
DarkSeph's Avatar
 
Name: Liam
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Location: Ireland

Posts: 623
Join Date: May 28th 2010

Re: trust issue? - August 25th 2010, 06:37 AM

It's perfectly normal. Some people don't even like going on webcam full stop, never mind undressing. Not wanting to do something has absolutely nothing to do with trust issues, it's simply personal preference, and if you don't feel comfortable doing something then your bf should be able to respect that. The fact he's bringing up trust sounds more like a guilt trip in order to manipulate you to do what he wants. I somehow doubt you'd push him to do anything on cam that he didn't want, so don't let him push you either.


Currently inactive...
  Send a message via MSN to DarkSeph  
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Member
Average Joe
***
 
StrigidaeofChrono's Avatar
 
Age: 21
Gender: Female
Location: Washington

Posts: 120
Join Date: March 30th 2010

Re: trust issue? - August 25th 2010, 06:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ShimmeringFaerie View Post
I don't think it's a trust issue at all. I mean, you would know if it was. I trust my boyfriend completely, but I wouldn't undress for him on webcam. Partly because you never know who could accidently walk in, partly because I would be a little concerned that spyware or something like that could get the footage, and partly because I think it's a little bit degrading.

But really, it shouldn't matter why you think it's weird. The fact is that the idea makes you uncomfortable and that you don't want to do it. You don't need to justify that to anyone. It kinda sounds like your boyfriend is trying to manipulate you into doing it by saying "oh, well, obviously you don't trust me". It's quite childish actually. Next time he asks, I think you should just tell him that you don't want to do it and that he needs to respect your decision. If he asks again or tries to manipulate/pressure you, I would just hang up on him until he realises that he is being ridiculous. It's stupid for him to want you to do something that you are uncomfortable with just to prove that you trust him.
I completely agree with this. There is nothing dumb about the way that you feel. I think its important to stand your ground and make your decisions respected.


http://strigidaeofchrono.deviantart.com/
"Setting boundaries is not a more sophisticated way of manipulation - although some people will say they are setting boundaries, when in fact they are attempting to manipulate. The difference between setting a boundary in a healthy way and manipulating is: when we set a boundary we let go of the outcome."

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way
I am Human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

Colonel Meow
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
semiller3 Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
semiller3's Avatar
 
Age: 22

Posts: 2
Join Date: August 25th 2010

Re: trust issue? - August 25th 2010, 06:29 PM

thank yall so much! we've talked about it and he said that he's sorry for pushing it and he respects my decision to do what i feel comfortable doing
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
PSY Offline
Hugh Jackman ♥

TeenHelp Addict
************
 
PSY's Avatar
 
Name: Robin
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Location: Southern California

Posts: 9,096
Join Date: June 12th 2009

Re: trust issue? - August 26th 2010, 01:59 AM

Glad to hear that things worked out! =) I'm closing this thread now, since the issue has been resolved; however, feel free to create another one, or PM me if you would like this particular thread to be re-opened.





   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
boobs, boyfriend, issue, skype, trust

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off





All material copyright 1998-2014, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.