SHY?!?

[soccerchick16]

So, my ex and I are best friends. We're always texting and he loves talking to me on the phone (he finds it hard talking on the phone with any other person). We tell each other everything. I love him very much, and I want to get back with him. He just recently got out of a 9 month relationship and I have been there for him the whole time. Whenever he couldn't sleep I'd be there, when he needed someone, I'd be there. I also go to see him at his house and we love each other's company one on one. It's just I find myself so shy around him at school! Idk why! I want to talk to him and mess around with him like I do with every other person there but it's hard with him. I told him and he said I shouldn't be shy! And he doesn't mind me talking or flirting at school but I get so SHY! I seem all ready but then I just can't do it. His birthday is Monday and I have bracelets to give him as a present that I wanna give at school but I don't want to screw that up either.
Another thing is he told me we would never get back but just recently he said give me some time and we'll talk about "us" soon I was so happy, I don't want my shyness ruining anything, I want him to like me more in person. He might date one girl as a rebound, he isn't sure yet, but until he decides I have time to strengthen what he feels for me.

Please help.

[niente_]

Well in my opinion he doesn't have any feelings for you. By saying he might date another girl for a rebound, he's saying he's putting you on a back bench. As in, lining up girls he feels like he'll go out with just for the sake of it. You don't want that type of guy.

You need to get over him. Because if you don't he will use you. How can he still have feelings for you if he's dated another girl for nine months? And then he is willing to date a different girl just for the sake of a rebound? He knows your have feelings for him and he is willing to use you. Do you really want a guy who does that? If he really loved you, he'd tell you, and he'd date you, and for a better reason than using you as a rebound. You even said it yourself "USING another girl". And he's already told you nothing will happen. He's getting your hopes up. Actually, he's ALREADY got your hopes up by telling you he'll talk about "us." Look what it did to you. What's gonna happen if he says no? You'll be gutted. And that's what will keep happening if you stay best friends.

Like I said before, you need to get over him. And I swear, the only way to do that is to stay away from him. I've been through it, and I know that this is the best way. I was friends with one of my ex's for months, and the more I talked to him the more I gave him an opportunity to get my hopes up, only to crush them and hurt me. I'd hate for you to experience the same. You may not want to get over him, or stop seeing him, but this is the best way. I swear by it.

Don't talk to him. Don't see him. If he asks why, say you're busy. No calling him. No going on any social network profiles that he has. Hide anything that reminds you of him. It'll hurt at first, but it works. It'll be the best thing for you. If you don't do it, you'll feel horrible for a long time. Please, for your own sake, get away from him and get over him. He's not interested in you, you'll get used and get hurt if not.

[RedJames]

ok first off the whole he might date someone else as a rebound is crap, if thats what he is thinking and feeling then he might not be as into you again as you think. IKt sounds more like a case of "if i can't find anyone better i'll come back to you" and yes i am a guy and yes i've done that very same thing before so i do know a thing or two about it. (not proud of it now, but i was back then) Its your life and thats something you'll have to decide and figure out if you wanna jump on that boat again or not, b ut i just figured i'd give you the heads up on that.
Now about your shyness, you shouldnt be shy, you've already dated once, your best friends no reason for shyness around him. Sounds more like your worried what other ppl with say and think about it then anything. And you know what don't worry about what other ppl at school think, does it really matter? Naw, what the hell do they know? Why should their judgement mean or effect anything in your life? You know what your doing, you know what you want, you know who you want to be and how you what to be it, not them. Bleh forget them and just go with your gut and let the real you out and free.

[soccerchick16]

So I talked to him last night, and he got upset telling me that he isn't trying to keep me like a back bench. I was on the phone with him and he was upset with me, ugh. He cares a lot, but I'd like him to like me again. Ever since he and his gf broke up he isn't sure how he feels about anything. (He still loved me while with his ex and we things we weren't supposed to). I wanna try to get him to find those feelings. I want to be "his girl" again. He said we'll talk about us, and ugh! I'm so confused! I ask him about it and he thinks I'm meaning something else! I talked to him at school today (Yay!) cuz I was trying to give him his birthday present. He was being rude and I said I have something to give you! Can I give it to you? - No. - Why? - *shrugs* - Well then I'll just put it in your backpack. - Go for it. - So when he was getting ready to leave while he was holding his backpack I put it in there. Ugh, we're great friends, and I'm trying to get us to be great friends around other people as well, because I really want him back, I haven't given up since last year and i got so close, and I don't want to drift away now. I love my ex.

[soccerchick16]

Soo, yesterday at school he was laying on this girl's lap (the one he might be considering the rebound) and I was getting so angry!! Finally the bell rang for us to leave the school and I texted him a few minutes later. - Hey - Hiya! - What's up - *No answer* - *I get home* - Are you busy? - Not ATM but I will be soon - Well, until soon comes can I come over or something. - Soon means soon sorry not today - Please, 10 minutes even if it has to be. I feel like there won't be a chance after this (me thinking of the rebound) - I will be home alone in a sec, wanna come by real quick? - Mmkay - Come in 5 to 8 minutes -. I told my mom I'm going to go ride my bike, I rode to his house and when I got to the park I called him and asked him if I can come he said yes and I walked with my bike to his house. After a minute, I was there and I rang the doorbell and he opened the door said hey and went back to the couch, laid down, and he watched TV. I sat inns different sofa (thinking why he wasn't being how he used to be when I came, all passionate) so I said I'm gunna go see your new bed you got and I started walking off to his room, he said hey now you can't just walk in my room (jokingly) and he came. We stayed there for a few minutes and he went back to the couch and I went and then threw a pillow at him and it hit his soda can and we cleaned it up. I sat next to him on the couch and as we were watching TV I started messing with him and punched him and he took his leg and wrapped it around me and I was laying on him sort of. I told him I was gunna go mess up his room and I tried to get up and he grabbed me and I got up and ran and he followed. I went and laid on his bed, and he turned on the TV and laid next to me. I told him he was a jerk for all he had said the past few days, and he said I'm sorry what am I supposed to do? I said I don't even feel special to you. He looked in my eyes and said how am I supposed to make you feel special? I said idk. And he said I'm gunna take a nap and he put his arm around my waist and said you can sleep with me. I turned and looked at him and I laid on him and he said awkward.. I got angry then said fine.. he grabbed me back. And we started holding each other in his bed. My legs wrapped in his, his arms wrapped around me, my head in his shoulder. And I asked if it was awkward, he said no. He put my hair behind my ear and when I turned he kissed me. I asked him why he stopped liking me, he said idk. I asked did I do something, he said no it just happens. Just like my gf got over me. Then I said so you're just doing the same thing to me? - No - Do you like me? - Nuh uh - Why? - Idk. - I don't feel special.. He wraps around me more. I tell him I don't want to regret this.. will this mean anything? - No.. - Ugh. - I move away and he says fine - I go under his blanket and he said what's wrong, I say I'm cold, he comes under the blanket and wraps around me and I fall in his arms and just lay on his chest. I didn't want anything to ruin the moment. And after a while my mom calls. I had to go. I hug him and we laugh and he grabs me and plays around and I ask do you want to like me again? He says idk what type of question is that? - Idk. Then we hug again and I leave. That whole time afterwards I kept replaying everything and thinking how it felt like he still felt for me. The way he held me, looked in my eyes. I just really don't know what to do. I really want to be with him more and maybe he'll feel it. Ugh. Please help, I'm so confused. I was so happy but thinking whether it was out of emotion for him got me thinking and I didn't want to be sad because I loved being in his arms. He can't do this with any other girl, he likes it with me.

[Umberto]

He outright said he didn't like you and that it didn't mean anything - maybe you should take him at his word and move on

[Saracen]

well, sweety.. seems lyk uve been carried away in love thing.. it hurts, but you like it... as our friends james and niente have identified, this relation will wxhaust you.. u'll be drained and will lose trust and faith in others as well...
its hard to move onn, but strong ppl do things hard way.. dont make the ppl your priority for whom you are just another option!!!
the choice is yours.. coz ive seen ppl madly running after their gf's and bf's for nuthing.. there are evidences.. indications, that u better take care of, else it hurts.. imagine a guy who fills you up, enriches you and puts you first on his list.. how wud that feel??
ur still t0o0o0o young.. (as he is just 16), and have a long way to go.. stay positive, stay bright... there are ppl in this world who wud fill you up and you will then feel s0o0o satisfied.. so, take over it.. u can do some visualization exercises as well, it helps.. lil mind sciences therapy..
have a lovely love life ahead!!! (love lives, rather.. :P)

[LovBabBlue]

I think you should see what else is out there and i know thats hard but its worth the wait especially for a guy who with no doubt loves you you don't want to be a maybe to a guy.