Always ruin relationships

[bigwheel]

It might help if you read my previous thread here


I have a problem whereby i get what you might call 'jealous'. I've always grew up around a family that were a little bit anti-social. By that, i mean, we don't have a lot of friends and when i have a girlfriend, i hardly speak to any other girls, and i certainly wouldn't invite another girl around because i fear my ex wouldn't be happy and i'm 100% loyal, i don't want to do ANYTHING in the slightest that would cause her to think bad of me.

So i've been speaking to the girl i mentioned in the other thread and within the last week, she's had 2 guy ''friends'' around to her house in the past week!!! I'm freaked out by this. I was considering a serious relationship with this girl and i don't think i could cope with her having all her guy friends over all the time.

I know you will all think i'm crazy but the fact remains, i'm very very uncomfortable with this.

And i'd say, unless you're a gay, male guy, you would, at any given opportunity attempt a kiss or more if the girl was giving signals out - it's in our blood.

I hate that girls can be so nieve and think a guy is just your friend and friend alone. He isn't. He is human, he has insticts and he probably wants to act on them and have sex with you...

Back on subject, i wasn't happy she was seeing a guy friend and it looks like it's all over, she doesn't seem to like me any more.

This problem has broke me up with 2 girlfriends and i've only ever had 2 girlfriends and i'm 21.

I'm a complete f*ck up :-(

I don't think i'll get over it, but it's gonna limit me getting a gf isn't it.

[PSY]

You make it sound as if any single man who is hanging out with any single woman (whom he finds attractive) will have a difficult time restraining himself from kissing her, having sex with her, etc. While we DO have biological urges, we CAN control those urges. Women have those same urges, believe me! Some choose to restrain themselves while others do not. The same goes for men.

So do I think it's wrong for a single person to frequently hang out with friends of the opposite sex, while both people are single? Absolutely not! What WOULD be wrong would be if this girl you're talking about actively flirted with her guy friends. If you have evidence that she is leading them on, encouraging them to make a move, etc. then yes, I think you have every right to be worried about where you stand as a potential boyfriend. If she's not doing any of those things, however, then you HAVE to give her the benefit of the doubt, just as SHE would have to give you the benefit of the doubt if you were hanging out with single female friends.

You aren't doomed to be single for the rest of your life - you just need to change the way you think about these sorts of situations. And maybe, just MAYBE, you've been unlucky so far and keep finding girls who are ridiculously flirty. It's not just the way you think about girls, it's also the way you SELECT girls.