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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
copland20 Offline
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HELP! CONFUSED! - October 6th 2011, 04:51 AM

okay so heres my dilema.
so i have this girl in my class that i recently starrted talking to a month ago. well in that month she broke a bone in her dominant hand. so one day in class she asks me if i'll write for her. i think she wanted to sit over by me 'cause her friend was near but the teacher made me go to her. so i do and we get to more talking and i pull my phone out 'cause i was texting someone and she grabs it and starts to mess around with it. so i start thinking this is a sign she might be interested but then she brought up the fact that she was wearing her BOYFRIENDS jacket. and starts talking about him saying"i just want to skip and go with my BF next period" and crap like that. so i think that she's about to put my phone down but she unlock it and starts putting her number on my phone. under her full name. she only goes by a part of her name. like say if her full name was alexandria she would go by alex. same thing on my phone. so as she's putting her number in she noticies that she can put a picture of yourself on it she pulls up the camera app. and for some reason i see my pictures popping up. i don't know if she had a chance to look at them as i yanked the phone away. i take it that i yanked it because after i asked her "what are you doing?" she responded with her head looking down as if she was caught. the reason i took it away was because i have pictures of illegal things in there and i don't want word to get out. i think she did see it. and at the HS football game the next day i went up to her and started talking to her. i aksed her "how did you break your hand?" and all i got was a shrug and a "i don't know" as if she was trying to get me away before people see us talking. any advice?


so im in class and we're doing a group project and she suggest i be in her group so i go. and long story short we basically screwed around the whole period and got in trouble. the trouble is we dident do the project and she screwed around with an index card and drew a male genital on it and i playfully added into it. well she thinks it'll be all fun and games and writes "from me" on it and gives it to another person. well the teacher sees and takes it and notices that it has my name. so she calls me outside asking if i did it, i say no and she calls the girl out. she asks her and she said she gave it to the student because she dident want it around her desk. so the teacher dosent know what to believe because we're both telling her diffrent stories. she dismisses us and as we're walking back to our seats we start laughing. then she said .playfully but somehow serious,"we should have said that girl did it" pointing to her friend that they have a love hate relationship if that makes sence. as if it's a joke getting in trouble. and then she randomly and willingly shows me her phone wiith texts from a guy. the gist of the texts is the guy's talking to her and saying he wants to have sex with her and he has a condom and he sends her a picture (keep in mind she has a BF) of the condom and he asks her if she's completly okay with it but in a weird way like "are you sure you're okay with it or do you not want to?) and she says"well i never said i wasent okay with it". so then i saw them making up all these plans to go afterschool and he goes to her house when no ones there.
so i need advice. how should i approach this situation.

p.s. the illegal stuff is marijuana but i don't need a lecture on why it's bad. i just need advice on a girl.

Last edited by copland20; October 7th 2011 at 03:00 AM.
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Re: HELP! CONFUSED! - October 6th 2011, 05:07 AM

I'd say its risky to have those pictures on your phone because of reasons like that. You probably hurt her feelings, I'd be pretty shocked if someone did that to me. Especially if they wernt nice about it. Also there is a chance that whatever she might have saw made her see you in a new and worse light. For example if it was drug related, and perhaps she dislikes drugs, so no longer likes you as much. I'd ttalk to her about it and maybe say your sorry for being so abrupt but that you really would like it if she didn't mess around on your phone.

"Setting boundaries is not a more sophisticated way of manipulation - although some people will say they are setting boundaries, when in fact they are attempting to manipulate. The difference between setting a boundary in a healthy way and manipulating is: when we set a boundary we let go of the outcome."

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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Jaguar Offline
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Re: HELP! CONFUSED! - October 6th 2011, 07:58 AM

She's just playing, and it's not a good game. Put some distance between you.

What just happened?
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: HELP! CONFUSED! - October 7th 2011, 09:52 PM

This girl is Trouble with a capital "T". She has a boyfriend - which means it wouldn't be right for you to make a move. She's also planning to cheat on said boyfriend - which means she isn't trustworthy. Honestly, I wouldn't waste another second on pursuing her. If you managed to get together with her, all she would be good for is sex. You can forget about having a more meaningful relationship with her, if that's what you were aiming for.

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