Engagement--how early is too early?.

[thinkingandage]

So... basically what it said... Your opinions on engagement because EVERYONE is engaged in high school after like two months =_= My bf proposed me for engagement, You know, we're still young and we only date for 3 month. it's really frickin' annoying. but anywho... your opinions?

[The Goblins Blade]

Three months is obviously too early, i say it would take at least a year or so to propose. It really depends on the couple and when they feel ready, some take a few years whilst some become engaged rather quickly.

Anyway, do you love him? Are you sure you want to be with him?

[Nicole!]

Originally Posted by The Goblins Blade

Three months is obviously too early, i say it would take at least a year or so to propose. It really depends on the couple and when they feel ready, some take a few years whilst some become engaged rather quickly.

Anyway, do you love him? Are you sure you want to be with him?

This. You are still in the honeymoon part of the relationship where you are pretty much blind to any flaws. 3 months is way too soon, its best to wait longer and see if you two really do work well together. There's nothing wrong with waiting, marriage is just some papers and a ring really. Either way you are still together.

[Le bonheur*]

I personally think 3 months is way too soon. My boyfriend proposed on my birthday which was 11 months into the relationship and though I think even that's too early; I said yes because I love him and want to be with him. It all depends on how you feel about your boyfriend/fiancée really, and the future you see with him, not what other people think.

[Maloo]

Originally Posted by thinkingandage

Your opinions on engagement because EVERYONE is engaged in high school after like two months

Yes, but you forgot the part that the vast majority of those couples don't even stay in a relationship, let alone get married.

[Aletheia*]

In my opinion, waiting a year before becoming engaged is pretty much a standard, especially now that I'm older. I used to want to become engaged to everyone I dated, but of course, I was young and naive then.

[Radzie]

I would not like to dissapoint you, but still i think that 3 months is a very less time for this real life proposal. I think that you should not turn him down, but take it real slow and take your time, don't let him down, but think wisely because this decision may change your life..
but the big question is that do you love him...?? If you do, then jump in...and let the destiny decide for you....

i hope you take the right road...good luck for the future...

Radzie

[Smileandstaystrongx3]

I would wait til after college.

[JessJ]

3 months is way too soon. If you want a solid marriage that will stand the test of time, please spend more time getting to know each other.

[LostAngels]

Of course it varies from person to person, but 3 months is definitely too early.

Especially if you have the mindset that it's 'annoying.'*
You need to do some emotional maturing yourself before considering such a big life change.

Up until at most (in most cases) one year is when couples may be experiencing feelings of deep infatuation.*
There is a large difference between infatuation and love. You should never marry someone who you're only infatuated with.

You need to ask yourself a lot of questions, and honestly answer them before making this decision.
Those questions include:
• Have you discussed children?*
• Have both of you spent enough time with each other's families to know exactly what kind of people your possible in-laws could be?*
• Are you comfortable talking to him about ANYTHING?*
• Does he make you feel like you want to be a better person all the time, and is he a positive influence regarding all aspects of life?
• What are both of your career/ university options?*
• Over-all, have you discussed incredibly important topics that regard the rest of your lives, and have you taken note of any conflicting problems?

There are many more things that need to be considered, but you need to take this slowly.*
3 months is almost never enough time to cover all of these topics.
Don't be impulsive, and if you don't agree to be engaged to him, he should accept that completely. If he doesn't, it's clear he's desperate for something that you don't want to give.

[Incompris]

In high school at all is too early, in my opinion, but it works for some so more power to them.

I would definitely never propose to a girl after 3 months. As others have said, a year at least.

[Lugez]

I think you're way too young, and 3 months is way too early. I would even say one year is too early too, but I guess it depends.

Just remember that there is literally no rush to get married...You're still young. Live life a little.

side note: I don't even understand how people get engaged that early...The mere thought of doing that right now makes me want to run to the hills.

[efyfseo123]

i would wait till my masters to complete.

[MacGuffin]

High school is way too young to get married in the first place, and three months is way to short a time to get engaged no matter how old you are. You haven't even hardly gotten to know each other in that amount of time. There is so much more you learn about your partner as time goes on, things that are really important to know before you get married to them. It really would be setting yourself up for failure to get engaged before you know all those things. Besides, most relationships from high school do not last. I've known of only two that have where the people have been actually married for over 20 years.

Personally, I think one needs to wait at least a year before getting engaged, preferable longer. In a year, you have a little more time to figure out things with your partner, learn about who they are, etc. In a year you will probably have had a big argument or two. I'm not talking about little ones where you get mad over him playing a video game instead of paying attention to you and both of you getting huffy about it. I'm talking about ones that really impact the relationship. Those kinds of fights need to happen in order to figure out how and if you can deal with conflict. Basically, I think you need to spend time in happy periods together but also weather some really tough challenges together.

Ideally, I would say wait until after college, until you've been together 2 or 3 years, and until your lives are established and you have discussed some very important things that would be deal breakers in a marriage, like how to raise children, how to deal with finances, etc. There is no rush to ever get married, because if it's the person you are supposed to spend your life with, they are not going anywhere.