question for the girls about looks...

[luck fife1]

ok, so I need to know something - how important is it to a girl for a guy to have a great body?

I'm 5'11, XXXlbs, dark haired, pretty thin except for some belly fat (like i'm thin everywhere else and you can see my ribs but i just have more belly fat than i'd like), not much muscle at all, and a lot of acne. I am not an athlete and I don't work out nearly at all because i always feel worse doing it and I'm really weak and unfit so its torture for me ><. I don't have a 6 pack, have pretty thin arms, and generally am a sort of scrawny kid.

I know from experience that I'm pretty decent looking, cause I know lots of girls that think i'm attractive. However, I'm pretty insecure about being so weak, unfit, and having all this awful face acne. I'm worried that when I start at my new private school in January people will judge me for these things. So girls, will you still go out with guys that don't have the greatest bodies in the world?

[Angel]

Have you considered the possibility that your issue isn't quite about your appearances as it is your insecurity? Many men are able to find partners despite their less-than-great physical appearances. It's not to say that looks aren't important since there needs to be a certain level of physical attraction between two people for a romantic relationship to form. What that level is differs from person to person, depending on their personal preferences. Not everyone goes after the built jock on the football team.

As for the exercising, you should try and focus on getting fit instead of getting built. You don't need to be an athlete to work out and get into good shape. If you're totally bent out of shape, the first few sessions will be absolutely brutal but I promise you they do get better as you improve your physical fitness.

[Lifeblood]

Agreed with Angel, and also just to say as long as you have a good personality you'll be absolutely fine
I was attracted to my bf by the time we got together obviously, but he wasn't really my 'type' and I think I became attracted to him physically *because* of being attracted to his personality

[how.we.operate.]

Honestly, it depends on the girl. Looks do play a role in with some people, but with others it is purely personality. I am the type that is mainly personality with a touch of looks.
In terms of you, you sound like most teenagers your age. Most people don't really gain muscle for a few years unless they are athletes/athletic. I agree with Angel, aim to stay fit if that is what you want--I'd suggest aim for fit than muscle. Do what you feel comfortable with, not what others think you should be or what you think others should see you as. Be yourself.

With my boyfriend, he started off as tall, stick skinny but of course a small belly (a lot of people have that), somewhat fit but not, and well he doesn't keep himself groomed very often . I like him for his personality really-the looks are a bonus to me. Now, he has been working out with our friend, so he has been staying in shape and he has gained some muscle.

[MacGuffin]

Personally, looks are important to me, but they are not the main deciding factor. What matters is the person they are and how they treat others. I don't need a guy with a chiseled body to be happy; I've been with plenty of guys that don't have "perfect bodies." The people who are worth being with you are not the ones who would leave you just for your appearance. So thank goodness it's pretty easy to weed that one out.

Keep in mind all girls have a body type, and some have a more wide variety. I've been attracted to men as skinny as XXX lbs and someone as large as XXX. It really depends on the girl. So just know there is always someone out there who will find you attractive, especially if what is on the inside is attractive, too.

We, however, cannot assuage your insecurities. That job is entirely up to you. Know, though, that you can do it, and can come to love the body you have. It really doesn't matter what other people think as long as you are okay with it. If it would feel better to you to work out more often, go for it. But don't do it just because others think you should. It's your body, and your choice, always.

[Sofiee]

I know how u feel!
I am different to u Im 5.11 and im not fat but i defiantly not thin what so ever, whenever people tell me what they like most about me its always my hair or my eyes, never my acually face as I have braces pimples, thin lips that are too small then the normal size for lips which is each end is in a straight line under the middle of each pupil. I feel very insecure and i always cover up as I have stretch marks (puberty and they are in my family genes)

But if I DO know one thing is that majority of the guys i know go for girls without perfect bodies!! And also majority go on personality also. There are the occasional idiots who judge but who cares? I found a saying that goes "Every little imperfection makes even the most unperfect person perfect" So its saying you non existant imperfections (who can judge what is perfect?) makes you perfect.

Judging by what you said, Dark brown hair tall but not tallest, skinny (if u can see ur ribs you dont need to lose ANY more!) and acne? easy use a cream for ur skin and that works like a charm! If ur feeling unfit pick up a school sport its much more fun!! (im super unfit because i roll my ankles and tear muscles in my legs alot) But eat celery also, it takes more calories to eat celery than celery has IN it, its healthy high in vitamins, you annoy people by eating it (which their faces are priceless!) and its just yummy!

[LostAngels]

Hey there.
You really need to realize that every single girl has a different idea as to what she finds 'attractive'.*
Looks are relatively important to us, but it's completely inaccurate to think we all have the same opinion.

I may not be the best person to answer, because my personal ideal appearance for a guy is very, very different.*
I love feminine men, with long styled hair who aren't afraid to wear make up.*
I hate muscles. The disgust me.*
There's nothing attractive to me about a guy with a 6-pack or 'big arms.' Yuck.*

Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder my friend. It doesn't matter what you look like, there will always be people who are attracted to you.*
But like everyone mentioned above, you need to be confident with your appearance. Regardless of what you look like, confidence is sexy.*
That being said, it also doesn't matter how buff a guy is, if he's arrogant and acts like he's the hottest thing around, there aren't a lot of girls who go for that either.

All in all, you really do just have to be proud of what you are. One day someone will be proud to call you theirs.*

Take care

[Aletheia*]

Honestly, it does depend on the girl. We all have different preferences for what we think is 'attractive'. We all don't have the same wiring in terms of who and who isn't attractive. For me, my boyfriend is a little over 6'0", and he's muscular, but he has sort of a beer belly, which he keeps in control since he's in the Army, and he stays fit. It doesn't bother me that he has a belly, considering it's not flab. Even if it were, looks are not the deciding factor for me (and for most woman), and if looks are the deciding factor for someone, that's just shallow and rude. There is more to a person than their outside appearance. There is personality, sense of humor, intelligence, maturity. Those are more important than looks.

[Shnookers]

All girls are different what they consider attractive. I'm not attracted to just looks and body image. Yeah one of my turn on's are muscles but I'm not gonna be attracted to him if he's a total ass and a player. I focus on the personality of the guy. So yeah I would go out with a guy with not such a great body.