I think my boyfriend might have depression.

[Ambiance]

We started dating about two years ago, and we've come to love each other very dearly. So, neither of us have ever been really preppy or anything but we had a rather large group of friends and it was all good. And whenever, we were together at a younger age, he seemed pretty happy. last year, he seemed to be down and kind of cranky some of the time, and he would NEVER talk to me about what was bugging him, and he started disliking some of our friends. At a couple points, though, he really kind of broke down and cried and told me how much better he wanted to treat me, and that he wanted to be more open and all; but he told me some things would change over a year ago, and it seems like they're happening again. It seemed to subside and then we had a good relationship for quite a while. However, we went through a rough patch when he was moving, mostly because moving was scary for him. And like, he's a good-looking guy and everything; he's got lots of charisma, and whenever he lived here, we both had other people to hang out with but we just sort of chose to see each other most of the time. We broke up twice in his moving process; I broke it off both times. The second time, he drank himself silly and tried to commit suicide. :/ We got back together, of course. He told me he wouldn't drink like that by himself and it wouldn't happen again. While we've been back together this past month and a half or so, it's been great. Like, he's been a really great boyfriend and he's done so much to try to make me happy, and he seemed genuinely happy himself! But lately, he's been talking like he just doesn't have anything to do in the city and he doesn't know anybody, and now it's like.. there's always obviously something wrong, and he won't ever talk about it much. I JUST talked to him and he said that he just wanted to check on me and stuff (nice idea and all, YET, but he sounded so freaking down. And I asked what was wrong, and he said he just had some stuff he needed to get over. I'm crying right now, because I thought that our relationship was genuinely better, but I've realized that he has some issues that are just going to continue resurfacing, and whenever they do, he's not really there for me, he doesn't seem very enthused for anything, and he's not very much fun to be around, and he doesn't really let me support him or act like I help at all and I try so fucking hard to help.. and I don't think he would agree to seeing a shrink.


Well, I love him a lot and I want it to work out so bad, but this is hard. I feel this energy being sucked out of me, because it's like, I had a good day today and then I realized this was happpening again and now I could not BE more bummed out. When we're together and both being positive, it's great, but then it changes to this... :/

I don't want to leave him What do I do?

[Aletheia*]

Well, as you know, we can't diagnose your boyfriend. If your truly concerned about his well being, you need to communicate that with him. It may lead to arguments, and it may lead to a break up, but from the sounds of it, something is definitely bothering him. Let him know you want to help, and that no matter what you'll be there for him. With something like this, you don't have to leave him unless it's necessary, and right now, it isn't. You don't know what's going on with him. It could just be typical teenage angst. Just talk to him.