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hello giraffie Offline
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Red face Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 26th 2009, 12:41 AM

The first thing you should probably know is that when I fall for a guy I REALLY fall for him, it's also REALLY hard for me to not be obscenely shy around them.

So, I like this guy, let’s call him John.
Anyway, John and I aren’t really friends. We have a class together, and we’re working on a class project together, but the only times we talk, we’re talking about the project. I really want to talk to him ouside of that class, but we don’t see eachother much for the rest of the day, and, more importantly, I can never think of anything to say to him. Every once in a while I’ll make a joke or something in class that’ll make him laugh, so I know he doesn’t HATE me, which is a good sign.
I'm also afraif that if i DON'T say anything to him, he'll eventually find out I like him and be totally creeped out. We go to a super tiny school, so it would be extra awkward if anything went wrong. But if I DO say something and it comes out wrong, or he misinterprates it, or something, it could have the same effect.
Also, John is on the basketball team, which I take stats for, and theres a big party for the team and everyone that helps next week. I’m really hoping I’ll be able to have a real conversation with him then, because it seems like the perfect opportunity.
So does anyone have any advice on what to talk about with someone you’ve never really talked to before, oher than talking about schoolwork?
Thanks

edit:// so in a previous thread i mentioned that this guy possibly likes my friend, who has a boyfriend. well, it turns out he does. and she likes him as well. she's having trouble with her current boyfriend and has been going to "John" for reationship advice, because she wanted an "unbiased oppinion" on what was going on, since niether she nor her boyfriend were friends with "John" before they started having problems. well, i guess one thing led to another and she is "taking a break" with her boyfriend right now, but another of my friends saw her kissing someone before school this morning. hmmm....
so, i don't really know if i like this guy anymore. i mean, he obviously likes her, and she likes him, and she's pretty much perfect. :| so what's the point in me liking him if i have absolutely no chance?



Last edited by hello giraffie; March 27th 2009 at 09:30 PM.
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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 26th 2009, 12:49 AM

Just make a joke - seriously - guys are nervous too. They laugh because they're nervous. Oh , the lines I've come up with. It's not necessary to be really smooth - just conversation is good. Books? Movies? Music? There are many categories in smalltalk for one to choose from.
Hint: Do not talk about basketball if it's not really your forte. Been there with a soccer player before. Eep. :P


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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 26th 2009, 01:48 AM

I agree with Ergg. You can find common ground with him somewhere. I'm sure you have the same interests, but you just haven't found it out yet. Like previously said, guys are nervous too, it's not just us girls. Just try to be comfortable and make him comfortable, and it all should work its self out. Keep us posted as to what happens. :]




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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 26th 2009, 04:07 AM

Well if you can make him laugh, that's a good sign.
Could you possibly IM him? Get his email or whatever. If you're nervous, make the excuse that you think you might run into a problem and need to ask something about your project, then continue a casual convo.
The party deffinately sounds like a good idea.
For things to talk about, you can always use google for ideas, lol.
Personally, when I run out of things to say, I like to ask them what they did the past weekend, or what they're planning on doing next weekend. People usually do so much in a weekend that you can find atleast one thing to elaborate on. Don't hesitate to tell him something cool you did too, as long as you're not talking about yourself 24/7 it'll be fine.
When you find something you have in common, run with it. You can also bring that up whenever there's an awkward silence.


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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 26th 2009, 08:06 PM

well, i really doubt that i make him nervous, or anything like that. he probably doesnt talk to me just because he's nt interested in me whatsoever. but i'm trying to let him know that i'm interested in at least being friends with him, if not more.
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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 26th 2009, 08:11 PM

i live in a small town also, and if ur town is anything like mine, people are generally pretty nice and understanding. I would just walk up to him and say hi, talk about the basketball game, or start with something like "wow that class was a bore," or "that teacher is a spaz" they'll chuckle a little and then go from there. If he's worth it, he'll talk to you.


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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 27th 2009, 09:33 PM

i edited my first post.
read it, please :/
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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 27th 2009, 11:09 PM

That really sucks =( I'm sorry to hear that.
That kind of thing always happens to me, I'm really sick of it.
Not all hope is lost. Keep a close eye on him. Maybe things won't work out between them. But remember, there's tons of other guys out there.


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Re: Uhg. Talking to boys... - March 28th 2009, 10:21 PM

yeah, i know. i just tend to get so caught up on one guy and it takes me foreverr to get over him, even a little bit.
it just seems so unfair, i mean, she already has a boyfriend and all, and now she's going after this guy, too.
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