19 and never dated,been kissed etc :(

[mattc1992]

so im a 19 year old guy, very shy and easily hurt because im super sensitive about everything.. lol

basically i feel incomplete. i want someone to care about, cuddle up and stuff

ive never had any close female friends or anything and it makes me really sad..

its the reason i hated highschool so much, no one was ever mean to me or anything it was seeing couples and stuff that made me feel pathetic

ive liked many girls but i never pursue that interest, i stay silent and sad because i dont want to look like an idiot because well in my opinion im socially retarded.. lol anyways ya....

advice or whatevs would be greatly appreciated

[heather_tate19]

well, since you don't really want to hear (what I think you meant) *good stuff*? I will be honest and say the same thing I tell a lot of people. think of being single as an adventure. You are only 19 years old! the average lifespan of a human being 80+ years, so you have more than enough time.

If you have *somehow* accepted that you're never going to be in a relationship, that DOES NOT mean you can't be happy! You should be happy with your life whether you are in a relationship or not. So, why not do something that can help you be happy? save up money and travel somewhere, go on an adventure, get into some hobby that you really like, or even a job that you really like. I cannot imagine someone living a life in depression because they are not in a relationship.

There is so much out there, and being in a relationship isn't always fun. I've noticed my sister and her boyfriend fight ALL THE TIME and I wonder how she is happy when she is in a relationship like that.

I guess what I'm saying is that, being in a relationship is nice once in a while, but it's not always a smooth road. It can be extremely rough and hurtful as well, probably even more hurtful than being single.

I have been single for over 5 years, and I felt a similar way that you feel right now (once upon a time) and all that I have left to say is, you seem really unhappy in your post, and I think that everyone has the right to happiness, and being in a relationship won't always lead you to happiness. You will find someone to love someday, and if you do something you are interested in, you just might find her in that same area. just be patient, and be happy.

[mattc1992]

idk what my interests are besides gaming alot and wanting a gf lol... ive thought about college but no job interests me in the least.. and goin back to school again makes me winced in agony... not because of bad treatment but.. the same reason im sad... i wanted a gf ... i failed many classes because i just didnt want to see the couples and stuff as it depressed me... i dont get out much... but i have a desire to... i just dont have the kind of friends that wanna do random stuff... or that come over and pull you out of your gaming escape to do watevs... i never had that... i wish i did...
lol so much wishing... and little doing... oh well

heh... im such a wimp... im in tears writing this all ...

and no i havnt accepted that i wont be in a relationship ... its just hard to stay positive when your a wallflower...

[Shawn K.]

Originally Posted by mattc1992

idk what my interests are besides gaming alot and wanting a gf lol... ive thought about college but no job interests me in the least.. and goin back to school again makes me winced in agony... not because of bad treatment but.. the same reason im sad... i wanted a gf ... i failed many classes because i just didnt want to see the couples and stuff as it depressed me... i dont get out much... but i have a desire to... i just dont have the kind of friends that wanna do random stuff... or that come over and pull you out of your gaming escape to do watevs... i never had that... i wish i did...
lol so much wishing... and little doing... oh well

Dude, put the controller down, take a shower, put on some clothes, and go out and get some pussy. If it doesn't work the first time, rinse and repeat. I haven't had sex yet and I can tell you need to get laid.

[chickenonsteroids]

Originally Posted by Shawn K.

Dude, put the controller down, take a shower, put on some clothes, and go out and get some pussy. If it doesn't work the first time, rinse and repeat. I haven't had sex yet and I can tell you need to get laid.

hahahaha is it just me that found this hilarious? Not because it's bad or anything

Well he's sorta right you need to try being more social and you'll get more friends which will hopefully lead to a relationship. Playing games all the time won't increase your chances.

Don't think of yourself as bad or anything but try being more active and you'll feel better about yourself.

[BruceLeeDemarcus]

I agree, you should be more active. Put a smile on your face and walk outside to meet some new people. I bet you aren't the only that is in this situation.

[mattc1992]

Originally Posted by Shawn K.

Dude, put the controller down, take a shower, put on some clothes, and go out and get some pussy. If it doesn't work the first time, rinse and repeat. I haven't had sex yet and I can tell you need to get laid.

heh lol i never go without showerin lol, im not a dirty greaseball lol xD
hmmm, and i dress like a skater with my west49 shirts and skinny jeans... lol i guess i dress like im going to impress but i dont actually go anywere haha.

idk what the hell im doing haha ive got my fav new era flat brimmed hats, my green and white skate shoes. lol i just need to try lol. i want to, but i dont out of fear lol. plus idk what i would wanna go do by myself :S. i live in canada so its really friggen cold right now lol.

[Shawn K.]

Originally Posted by mattc1992

heh lol i never go without showerin lol, im not a dirty greaseball lol xD
hmmm, and i dress like a skater with my west49 shirts and skinny jeans... lol i guess i dress like im going to impress but i dont actually go anywere haha.

idk what the hell im doing haha ive got my fav new era flat brimmed hats, my green and white skate shoes. lol i just need to try lol. i want to, but i dont out of fear lol. plus idk what i would wanna go do by myself :S. i live in canada so its really friggen cold right now lol.

You know I'm just messing with you man. I'm just saying, you sound like a smart guy who knows exactly what the problem is and exactly what needs to be done. But instead of pulling up your jockstrap and getting it done, you come up with all these details and excuses. Take yourself SOMEWHERE where there are other people and you won't be "by myself."

And about it being cold...C'MON MAN...I'm gonna assume that the temperature is motivation for a whole lotta people in Canada to be makin some heat bonin under a bearskin rug right now.

[mattc1992]

Originally Posted by Shawn K.

You know I'm just messing with you man. I'm just saying, you sound like a smart guy who knows exactly what the problem is and exactly what needs to be done. But instead of pulling up your jockstrap and getting it done, you come up with all these details and excuses. Take yourself SOMEWHERE where there are other people and you won't be "by myself."

And about it being cold...C'MON MAN...I'm gonna assume that the temperature is motivation for a whole lotta people in Canada to be makin some heat bonin under a bearskin rug right now.

haha true , just dont know were to go lol. plus i live in the middle of nowhere.. and dont drive..

[SamMarie]

You see what's wrong, what are you afraid of? Not everyone is going to like you, but that is just life. However, on a positive note, there will be someone that likes you if you step out of your comfort zone. Yeah, easier said than done, but everything usually is. Accept who you are and then people will accept you for who you are. Then, you'll be able to find someone. Everything takes time. Be friends with that person first. The best relationships start out as friends. Play it like a video game. First, you're a "newbie", you have to learn more about the environment, about you, the people you must communicate to win this "game". or in other words, the right person. Everything is competition and just like everyone else, finding the best person is competition. We're all playing in the game of being in a good relationship. It's all about how you play the game to get there. So, that doesn't mean changing completely who you are, but changing yourself in order to be better known and to even feel better about yourself. Good luck!

[mattc1992]

thx everyone i'll see what i can do haha

[xxpaigiexx]

Hi there,

I can understand that this would upset you. I know it's difficult not knowing what to say to girls, but it is honestly just like making friends with guys... girls will like that fact that you're honest and sensitive they just have to see that side of you. Just try speaking to a girl maybe that sits near you in class or something like that, try just smiling, being polite and starting up a basic conversation with them.

It's honestly not difficult. Approaching a girl you like is a completely different ball game, that is harder but what I think you should do is get to know a few girls as friends first to boost your confidence.

Paige

[livinghippo]

Originally Posted by mattc1992

so im a 19 year old guy, very shy and easily hurt because im super sensitive about everything.. lol

basically i feel incomplete. i want someone to care about, cuddle up and stuff

ive never had any close female friends or anything and it makes me really sad..

its the reason i hated highschool so much, no one was ever mean to me or anything it was seeing couples and stuff that made me feel pathetic

ive liked many girls but i never pursue that interest, i stay silent and sad because i dont want to look like an idiot because well in my opinion im socially retarded.. lol anyways ya....

advice or whatevs would be greatly appreciated

dude, you summed up my life in the first para.
neither have i and im close to you soo yeah,
but seriously dont listen to me im just a youngling <.< lol.

dw bout it, put on some overly happy music and forget about your worries, i'm sure we all get our chance one day. theres about.. what? 3 billion women on this planet.. doing further maths leaves an oppertunity of about a couple of hundred million
xD

[PSY]

I want to echo what everyone else has been saying. If you want to meet girls, you have to get out of the house and make a genuine effort to meet them! You'll get as much out of this experience as you put into it... so if you stay home all day and sulk, you won't make any progress. Even if you go to a friend's party, flirt with one or two girls, and they aren't interested, that's SOMETHING. You can learn from it - maybe you can on too strong, maybe you didn't give them enough time to become acquainted with you, maybe your timing was off, etc.

In addition to forcing yourself out of the house (because you're not going to feel very motivated at first), work on your self-esteem. One of the biggest turn-offs for a woman is an insecure man. That doesn't mean you can't have insecurities, because we ALL have them... but blatantly showing them and essentially throwing a "pity party" for yourself is a sure way to scare girls away. Frankly, if you don't think you're good enough for a girl, then you're not. You're only worth as much as you believe you're worth. If you're not in a place where you can love yourself, then you're not ready to be in a relationship.

I wish you all the best. =) You've got a lot of great responses to go off of! Good luck!

[ff.picc]

You need to reconvince yourself of who you are. Your in a slump in your head right now,and all it takes is to reprogram yourself out of that. I know plenty of kids that are HUGE Gamers, that have girlfriends, go out, and enjoy themselves. Sometimes being over the top socially, will reduce the awkwardness. I know a kid that all through highschool, he was WAY Over the top, socially awkward, crazy, weird per say. After graduation I questioned him about it, and he said that he went from having no one to ever talk to, to all these kids that didn't mind him around. He didn't know how to cope with this awkardness in himself, so he just threw it all out there with no content. He didn't care. He said it really helped him find who he was and was able to sense what part of what he was doing started to get awkard, and when was too much. Now, he's in college, and I met a few of his friends, He's just like the rest of us now.

I know this story may not be you, but you can change, all you need to do is tell yourself, I'mma go out, I'mma do me, I'mma change.