He's amazing and I'm just a friend.

[The Darkness]

Basically, he's mysterious and wonderful and I really really like him but he's my closest friend. I mean, I don't want to ruin our friendship in any way if he doesn't share the same feelings. I feel he sends mixed signals, but agh I don't know what to do. I'm too shy to go out and tell him because, well like I said. He and I have lots in common and I can't stop thinking about him. I make stuff up to talk to him on facebook (since he lives in the city I used to live in) and I've dreamed about him. Oh what do I do?

[Nicole!]

Well what kinds of mixed signals is he sending?
This is a tricky spot you're in. You have to decide if you're willing to sacrifice your relationship for this. After admitting your feelings, it is possible to remain friends, but that all depends on how he takes it.
I would continue flirting (if that's what you have been doing) and try to give him hints that you are interested in something more.
This isn't a decision that I can make for you, you have to decide if it would be worth it.

[xxpaigiexx]

Hi Jane,

I don't think making things up is going to help you to get to know this guy better. I suggest speaking to him and just ask if he likes any girls or anything like that. I would just see if he wants to hang out, just you two and see how he reacts to that. Get to know him better and see where things go from there.

Paige

[Aletheia*]

Making things up isn't going to do you any good. He could figure you're lying to him, and that could completely turn him off. If you want to speak to him, just say hi or what's going on or how are you? Those are conversation starters that will let the conversation go as it should be WITHOUT the made up things you try to talk about.

It's hard to know about these mixed signals if you only talk on the internet. You could be misinterpreting them completely, and he only likes you as a friend. Or, you could be entirely right and he likes you as more than a friend. It's hard to say.

Right now, I think it's best to continue with how you're handling things minus the lies.

[Chris.]

I agree - the bottom line if you need to build on to the friendship and once you feel really good talking to him maybe just come out and ask him. See the thing about this situation is I think we all have at one point fallen for liked our best friend - and we were all faced with two options: Ignore our feelings, or share our feelings and risk the friendship. Believe it or not, its better to have your heartbroken by him saying no, then you finding out years later that he liked you and you never made a move. So communicate - and then maybe flirt with him and see his reactions. If they are positive make a move.



Best wishes,
Chris