I've broken my own heart...

[adviceseeker94]

I've been off and on for a guy for the past 3 years. I finally called it quits after all the lies. We both still want to be together and both still love each other but we were always fighting and he was always lying. I can't stop crying... I need advice on how to start moving on and just some one to talk to about it all... Can any one help me...?

[Aletheia*]

You just have to remember WHY you broke up. If he was continuously lying, there is little chance that he's going to change his ways (my sister is in the same situation). You need to remove yourself from the situation entirely, so that also means ending your current relationship with him (such as a friendship). You need to end contact until you can finally move on from the situation. It doesn't mean forever, just until you can get over what has happened between the two of you.

[Chris.]

I agree with Shannon. Often people think that they can remain friends after a tuff breakup - but most people cannot handle that. In this case, it is best that you cut all ties, and you move on fully. Meaning: delete his number, facebook, twitter, etc. It sucks, and it is alot of hassle. But these are things that you need to take part in so that the moving on can come easier to you.

After that, I would start getting More involved within friends. Try to stay busy. The busier you are, the less time you have to think about him. Also, maybe even start taking action into someone else you have had feelings for. The main point is - don't be alone as much, get out there and be more socially active - I promise it will make the healing process that much easier.



Best wishes,
Chris

[NewsFly]

Oh boy, I know exactly how you feel and -sort of- dealing with a similar situation. =(

I believe that you can get through this and move on from him. For now, think about all the bad, lies, and pain he's done to you so it makes it easier for you to not want to return. Focus on yourself, friends, and the things you want to do in life. Watch comedies, listen to upbeat awesome music, etc.

When I was still with my boyfriend, he would do something that would -terribly- hurt me such as lying and the premeditated desire to cheat (because he thought I would cheat on him anyway based on his past relationships). I would just as easily take him back and be hurt yet again within 2 weeks. You shouldn't have to deal with such hurt and pain. You deserve better. If you want, send me a private message, and we can be buddies that get through this hard time together!