I'm panicking at the thought of moving on, all this time later

[ontheBUS]

[This is a little longer than intended, but ANY kind of advice would be helpful. I'm at my total wits end.]

Over the summer I was in a very brief but wonderful relationship. I was meant to be a rebound, but I ended up getting very close with him and his friends. I've never felt so truly, genuinely loved, or like I could love back so freely. I don't think he intended to or was ready to get that involved, and ended things because he felt guilty. Things were left open ended, and I do believe I was more than a rebound (I should add, there was no sex in this relationship, I was not being used that way).
About once a month since then one of us will say something, but it's killing me now. He usually makes a comment on an old photo on facebook, which always prompts me to write him. He's had many times to stop me from contacting him, but doesn't; I've told him if he doesn't want to "go there" again, I'll stop, but he can't even say yes or no to that. About 2 weeks ago it happened again, and for the first time I got serious. I wrote something unemotional but very, very honest. His response was casual and avoidant-- the only thing he responded to directly was my invite to hang out, which he played out as nearly impossible with his work schedule. I just needed to know if there was anything left for us now or in the future, and he left me hanging again. He's 21, and I just didn't expect him to react so sheepishly.
I got a new job about 2 months ago and I'm in a really nice position because there are only 2 other girls my age and lots of guys, several of whom have shown interest in me. I'm enjoying the attention, but a few of them have gotten more serious about seeing me outside work, and all of a sudden I feel panicky. It's a small environment and most of these people have worked together or known each other out side of work for years. There's no gossip/drama-- it's very family-like, and I can't date any of them casually without there being hurt feelings at work (or without putting myself "off limits"). I'd doing well even after the last exchange with my ex, but suddenly I feel SO depressed and overwhelmed. I'm attracted to these guys, but just feel too indifferent to do that to them or have fun for the sake of getting over my ex.
I have never had this problem before and I am so uncomfortable. I'd go to my ex at this point and get honest-- but I already have and I'm trying to be low drama after all the poking I've done since we split.

[metalheadjessus]

This is crazy. I'm in more or less exactly the same situation; the dude I was with for a few months in the summer had come out of a one and a half year long relationship two months before we got together.

From my experience in this, I wouldn't hold your breath for anything to happen in future, and please please please don't make the same mistake that I did of misinterpreting booty calls to mean something. I'm not saying that you would, I just don't want you to do what I did that caused me even more emotional discomfort! If you can, then move on to someone new and do whatever you've gotta do to make yourself happy.

I hope that this helped somewhat, and I'm sorry if it sounded like a mash of incoherent dribble, I'm just not very good at organising things in a logical way, haha.

[PSY]

His failure to give you a "yes" or "no" answer is, essentially, a "no" answer. I don't know why he's failing to be straightforward with you - maybe he's still feeling guilty about leading you on and wants to "make it up" to you by being friendly occasionally (but, of course, that's just leading to even more confusion on your end). I would let this go. Don't expect anything from him from this point on.

As for your co-workers, I personally wouldn't date them, but that's your call. I would hate to deal with tension at work in the event that things didn't work out.

[Singer180]

I don't know how old you are, but for most guys in their 20's the last thing they want is a committed relationship. I would think that he is talking to you occasionally just to keep you hanging on to him. You have other options so explore them and see where the go