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Join Date: July 18th 2012

I deal with emotional neglect and it's killing me - November 24th 2012, 01:57 AM

I face emotional neglect mainly from my mother and somewhat my father, my mother I don't know, once upon a time we got along great and there are episodes where she might give me a little affection, nowadays something is always wrong with me, I need top notch grades, if I get sick my mother would worry about grades or others instead, I rarely get hugs and kisses or any motherly attention since 8 years old, my little brother often get's attention as such, I looked it up on what it was it says it's not my fault and that it's still abuse if I don't get emotional comfort, I've been bullied and lonely for years, I'm always insecure, I don't want to bother my father, I'm a non gay guy and asking your dad for help is dumb, my father is constantly busy tired and probably depressed himself, he deals with alot of things on a daily basis it'd be selfish to go pester him, he has a temper and I'm afraid he'd burst onto me as well, I suffer from constant chest pains, it'd hurt alot and I can't breathe right, one time my mom gave me small attention but I got the same 'deal with it' or 'your gonna take anti dperesetns and go crazy take it like a man' Im still grateful for the food water and no beatings, though I can't help but feel I'm bad, I used to be bullied and made fun of, now it's better after going to a high school a little far, I need help I'm confused I suffer from constant chest pain, I would go on a fiction websites and would be glued and addicted to stories about neglected kids being adopted and getting motherly and some fatherly attention, I just want to know if what's happening to me is bad because I have everything I need, my brother gets attention and love, so is it my fault? am I a burden?