[Ghost On The Highway]

Hey, I know you're going through some really tough times right now, but abusing drugs and alcohol really isn't going to help. Believe me, I've been there (borderline alcoholic that is) and it really screwed me up for several years. As for diphenhydramine / benadryl, that can have pretty bad adverse effects in overdose, such as memory loss, motor impairment, and cardiac problems. I used to take a bunch at night to beat insomnia, and I always felt like shit the next day. Do you see a doctor or psych? If so, he or she may be able to prescribe something like xanax for times when you feel out of control or anxious. Personally, I'd recommend an herbal tea, kava kava, etc.

If you're going to take over the counter drugs recreationally, it's really important to know what exactly you're getting yourself into. I've gotten high off OTC's in the past, and I had to make sure the drug didn't also contain acetaminophen (tylenol) for risk of internal organ damage, or antihistamines for other reasons. As an antihistamine, benadryl can be very dangerous recreationally, and honestly it isn't that fun of an experience anyhow. Hope this helps, feel free to PM or VM me.