TeenHelp - View Single Post - I need help my parents found out about my self harm?!

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Hey there,

When my parents found out my dad made me go to counseling and I wasn't open to that at all because I didn't want the help. However, looking back I wish I had been more accepting of that offer because I could have gotten the help I deserved and I might have been able to stop before my self harm got as bad as it did.

When parents find out that their child is self harming I think it is really hard to deal with. They see their child suffering yet they are helpless to do anything about it. I think your parents handled it quite well in most respects and I am glad you were able to talk to your mom about it some more.

I think you should definitely try and work on getting in to counseling because it will be an amazing tool in helping you work on getting to a better place. A therapist will also be able to help your parents better understand your struggle with self harm which could be beneficial to you. I know my dad was in therapy when he found out about my self harm so his therapist was able to talk him through some of my struggles. But, with your parents, your counselor might be able to explain it a little bit better, you know?

It also might help if your parents gained some more knowledge on self harm. I know when my parents started realizing what an issue my self harm was my mom read a few books about self harm. I don't know if that would be something you would be comfortable suggesting to your parents but if so maybe you could just tell them "I don't know how to explain it to you but maybe if you read up on it it would help." Also, you could try printing them out educational information about self harm. I don't know how comfortable you would be with that but the more informed they are the better.

Do you know what your triggers are? I think you should try to work on identifying what causes you to want to self harm so that you can work on dealing with those issues. It can be really hard to identify your triggers at times but if you journal when you feel an urge to harm yourself it can help.

I would also like to suggest that you look at the Alternatives to Self Harm and you start turning to those when you feel an urge to self harm. I know that might be hard to do at first but if you use them enough your body can adjust to them.

Lastly, I think it would be good if you continued trying to communicate with your parents about this. I know that might be hard to do but try and be open with them about this. Let them in on your struggles so that they can be there to support you. Your parents love you and they do not want to see you hurting like this. You can overcome your self harm and they can help you with that if you let them. You don't have to do it alone.

I hope this helped and if you need anything please feel free to message me.